The irony is you probably write better in English than they do!

Supermarkets who slowly, stealthily replace proper branded items with their own-label stuff. First they get rid of the popular sized packets so you have to buy enormous packs, then they start on those too until there are no branded ones left and the shelves are full of their own items.

People (it seems to be mainly scientists so far) who begin almost every sentence with 'So....'. I've heard this quite a lot recently on Radio Four and on Newsnight.

Interviewer: Could you tell us a little about your research?

Scientist: So....what we are doing is....

Grrrr.

The way my partner potters around the house like an old lady!

Yesterday we sat down to watch tv and he wanted something from the kitchen so i paused it while he went out to get it. Then i hear cupboards opening, then washing up being put away. I then get ready to play as he approaches the living room but no hes going upstairs to get something. Then hes back in the kitchen washing up. Then cleaning it. Almost half an hour later hes ready to watch tv!

I can understand the need to be tidy but it couldve waited until after the show!

The audience whooping and hollering on TV shows. It's even started appearing in Question Time now, what's wrong with polite applause?

People who say 'ooh, don't you eat slowly!' No, I eat at a sensible pace rather than slobbering and chewing as though it's some kind of race.

When you have something like a cereal bar that's been squished a bit so it breaks when trying to get it out of the wrapper and the rest of it so so stuck you end up ripping the wrapper up to get the rest of it. Now that's trivial

Forgetting about a cup of coffee/tea and taking a big swig to find it's stone cold bleurgh!

People at traffic lights in the right hand lane who decide to indicate to turn right as the lights change to green, leaving you desperate to go straight ahead, marooned, while the left hand lane sails past!

Also, again at traffic lights (those with a right hand arrow), people who don't move far enough into the junction to trigger the right hand arrow sequence, meaning only one car can turn right per light cycle.

For me, it's "Nom, nom, nom!" Aaarrrrggghhhhhh

TV weather forecasters as a warm/hot spell approaches.They get so excited.

When it's colder in my office than it is outside. Really really annoying.

When the nylon string on the strimmer snaps and disappears into the reel when you only have 8" left of border to trim. Every time!

Accidentally, hoovering a rogue sock into a Dyson, which then gets stuck at the top of the clear plastic bit.

Eating noises. I have no doubt whatsoever that I make them too, but there's just nothing more revolting than hearing food being mulched up in someone's gob....And that's people eating with their mouths SHUT. My GF occasionally opens her gob mid-chew - it normally results in neither of us speaking to each other for the remainder of the evening, such is my nazi-like approach to the act of masticating.

People who complain about being fined for breaking the law whilst driving.

Little tip: Don't want to get a fine? Don't do the opposite of what the road signs tell you.

Yeah, speeders who expect sympathy for being caught

Laptops on trains - The user attached to them tends to hog all the available space, often puts laptop bag on the spare seat, and then looks at you like a moron when you have the audacity to want to sit down in the 'spare' seat.

I always think their bosses must love them too, got em working before they're due start and on the way home.

People who claim not to smoke but bum loads off smokers on a night out. Buy a pack for the night out!!!!!

People who crunch hard boiled sweets i.e. mints, instead of sucking them until the sweet has disappeared.
My wife does this. She unwraps the sweet, puts it in her mouth, and CRUNCH CRUNCH !
3O seconds later, another one goes in her mouth.
Whereas I still have my FIRST sweet 15 minutes later.
It's a wonder she hasn't broken her teeth by now !

That I love where I work except that it is up high on top of a hill and is always, always foggy. the rest of the world can be basking in an Indian summer and I spend all day in the dank dampness.
And it makes my hair frizz!

The monotony of translators on news reports. "What a great day for the Iraqi people. I am so happy." Why can't they convey the emotion with which the person's really talking?

People who use "Hoover" for every type of vaccum cleaner. A Dyson is not a Hoover!!!!

Rant over

People who tap,or poke me on the shoulder.

It does something to me that sends my temper into orbit and really have to grit my teeth to stop myself shouting,'WHAT DO YOU WANT??!!'

Having more than one tab open on my browser, and in one of them I click on a link so it is ready for later. Later, I go to read the page I clicked on, but instead of seeing the new page I wanted the old page is still there with a small blue highlight over it where I accidentally dragged on the link instead of clicking on it.

Ahem!

From the Oxford Dictionary no less....

verb
(hoover) [with object] clean (something) with a vacuum cleaner:he was hoovering the stairs
(hoover something up) suck something up with or as if with a vacuum cleaner:hoover up all the dust
(hoover something up) informal consume something quickly and eagerly:he hoovered up three slices of cake.

Me 1 - Pedant 0

People pronouncing 'escalate' as 'esculate' really annoys me. 'Esculator' as well. It seems to be a common mispronunciation around these parts. It's almost like people say it on purpose!

Opening a new tab in your browser and then forgetting what you were going to do with it.

The 21st Century equivalent of going into a room and forgetting what you went in there for.

It's still using a different brand name for something else. And it's wrong, dammit.