Following on from other people's observations that one or other of the twins always seems to be everywhere, listening in on every conversation in the house at any given moment, I'm going to seize the opportunity to ask whether anyone could possibly give me a reliable guide to telling them apart?

I know that one's Jack and one's Joe, one's gay and one's straight, one's slightly slimmer than the other and one of them consistently wheels out the line 'lower your tone and strengthen your argument' but I honestly don't know which is which! Any help would be much appreciated...

Thank you!

Jack - gay, calmer more affable (think he is the main lurker)

Joe - straight, stroppy and confrontational

Jack has a rounder face, slightly bigger.

why do we care which is which both as annoying as each other

Joe always looks to Jack for approval when he makes a 'funny' comment in the diary room.

Thanks very much, all - most helpful!


This did make me laugh! I totally take your point but I do think that one of them appears slightly nicer (less whiny/selfish?) than the other - and though neither of them is anywhere near as funny as they think they are, from time to time one or the other makes me smile (or cringe, depending on the situation!) and I'd just like to be able to tell which one I'm looking at on those occasions!

Got to agree with this.

I see them as one and the same.

Get them out!

Joe looks skinnier.

One is more vile than the other but both are vile. I think the gay one is the most vile.

Jack has a combover to hide the shaved part from the task, Joe wears the sides of his hair shorter. They're both bitchy, but Joe has a harsher tone to it, and Jack is more catty bitchy.

LOL! I despised them both a short while ago but have to admit my opinion has mellowed a little recently. I'm definitely not a fan of theirs by any means but I think there are one or two other HMs I'd prefer to see go before the twins are finally given their marching orders!


Thanks, Amy!


I get what you're saying (and again I'm afraid I laughed!) but I'm not certain that degrees of 'vileness' are apparent when simply looking at one or other of them onscreen for a few seconds at a time!


Ooh, thanks v much for this helpful detail, Flight. I must have missed the task you're referring to so would not have known to look out for the different hairstyles otherwise. Will also now pay closer attention to which type of twin-bitching I'm witnessing at any particular moment...

Thanks again everyone! Think I'm going to head off to bed now so please don't think me rude if I fail to respond to any further Twin Tips tonight!

I really have no inclination to try and figure out which one's which at this point but I do feel quite guilty about it. For all I know it could just be the one of them who does all the things I despise while the other may be quite pleasant, but I happily direct my vitriol towards the two of them as though they are one entity. Having said that; I am quite confident that my vitriol is well directed as even when there are two of them on the screen I'm intensely irritated by both presences, so I suppose I've nothing to be concerned about.

Jack has the fatter face. Joe has the slimer face.

True!

The Twins are really bugging me now, because I don't know the difference either, but I despise them so much that I simply can't be arsed to put the effort into learning which one is which.

It's like bloody Groundhog Day therefore (which I blame them for!)

I wouldn't go that far!

One is slightly less rotund but both are deluded and nasty and are less funny than my cats scratching pole.

Jack is the one all over Charlie/hazel ,fatter and boring

Joe is the one with the mouth , slightly less boring

all i know and im not being nasty is the fatter one is Jack.

Jack (Hazels apparent new best friend / Got hair cut in week 2/3 / Rounder face / Does the hula dance on request)

Joe (The bossier one, dare I say- slimmer? More obsessed with "the game" / The more independent one)

If it helps op, joe is the one who constantly says" lower your tone strengthen your argument", but I agree with most in that it doesn't matter as both are horrible

Jack = Rounder
Joe = Blockier

The fat one is Jack and the other fat one is Joe

I think it's so hilarious when people cautiously refer to joe as the slimmer twin because both are so large. That's one statement where context goes a long way.

I don't see how those boys managed to get that size while their parents are much smaller. Doesn't help that they work in a grocery store. I bet their granny plies them with treats all the time.

They remind me of Bob Hoskins' character in Felicia's Journey - the overweight food loving psychopath with an obsession for women (hazel).

In a world of depressing fat c****s, the fatter, and more depressing c*** is king.

Jack's the bigger Blooby - that's all you need to know.

(And yes I hope they are reading this, damn them!)

Grandmother, I think you may have gone a bit far there. I'm not sure that I've ever seen that word used in a general public forum, asterisked or not.

Still, I'm sure you're not alone in thinking that they're a 'fat pair of c...haps'