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Worst Facebook status updates (Part 2)
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PurpleParachute
25-09-2013
Oh God, so the racist woman I deleted off my facebook is pregnant again. She'd already lost three babies through miscarriages. Apparently, according to her own comments on FB, she lost twin babies because she wasn't eating enough food!

Anyway, here's the latest:

Quote:
“Amazin wot u find ot wen u accept ramdon girls that add ya oh yh n i am pregnant if u dnt lyk suck my big toe c*nts”

I only find this stuff out because people on my friends list comment on this rubbish!
kiviraat
25-09-2013
Originally Posted by PurpleParachute:
“Oh God, so the racist woman I deleted off my facebook is pregnant again. She'd already lost three babies through miscarriages. Apparently, according to her own comments on FB, she lost twin babies because she wasn't eating enough food!

Anyway, here's the latest:



I only find this stuff out because people on my friends list comment on this rubbish! ”

I wish I had some car crashes Thank god for this place!
los.kav
25-09-2013
I had a friend who posted that it was her baby's six month birthday. They had a party and everything. That's not a thing, is it? If it is, I'm 30 and six months and I demand a party!
Dannielle_Howel
25-09-2013
I have this rather odd manchild who seems to think people cannot go back into his history to see what he's said. About a year ago he claimed he was gay, telling everybody, including family members - Now I'm not very close to this person, he just posts enough status daily that I know of him and he's very very annoying. Recently I saw his relationship status change, too in a relationship with a girl and do you know those Askfm things? he posts those to his facebook and people are like "What the hell, we thought you were gay" and he replies with "WTF you ****, I never said I was gay. thats disgusting" and basically posts a whole a status about how he could never be gay... Insulting gays aside, how stupid does he actually think people are?!?
mrsmoose
25-09-2013
Some one on mine has just posted a photo of their child looking sad sporting a cut and bruised face (with no explanation obviously!)

I have visions of her going "Look sad for mummy!", the child's granddad has just posted that he wasn't actually sad, just trying to watch TV while mum took the photo of him for Facebook!

I hate parents posting photos of their child's injury's and tagging them at the hospital for attention for themselves. it's disgusting!
Irishguy123
25-09-2013
Originally Posted by SecretLifeoBees:
“"De-friending time"
"Gonna clean up my friends list"
"Time to delete people from here"


Or any other similar phrase. Cue comments of "I hope it won't be me/I hope I survive the cull." If you are going to delete people just get on with it. The way I see it is that it seems people only announce it so they get all the "I hope it won't be me" type comments.”

I actually love it when people put up those statuses, I always immediately unfriend them

Originally Posted by MissPinotGrigio:
“Oh lord, I was hoping this would happen.

Selfie hotpants girl has responded to a friend's 9/11 tribute with: "Online shopping keeps me alive for another 3-5 days"

When challenged with "don't you know what she's posting about?" she responds with "what's 9/11? A TV series"?

*facepalm/headbutt*”

Is this a spoof profile by any chance? People simply can't be that stupid

Originally Posted by PurpleParachute:
“I joined DS just so I could post in this topic. Anyway, there's one woman on my FB I've just had to delete because she's always coming out with statuses like this:



And this:



Then there's this:



Can you believe she's twenty-six?! And who on earth calls a two-year-old "sexy"? I also can't stand the way she abuses anybody foreign! Christ, I can't believe I went to school with her. ”

Funny thing is, all the "forana's" probably have better Enlgish than she does
designer84
25-09-2013
A friend I knew since school posted a rather racist tirade just after the Lee Rigby incident. I had to delete her because it was disgusting. I barely ever see her anyway but I don't have time for all that. it was unnecessary and I am sure a few people probably weren't impressed
Leicester_Hunk
25-09-2013
Soooo happy at the moment )))

Someone posts this over and over again, then another time she's constantly whingeing about how fed up she is
Tt88
26-09-2013
Someone just uploaded a pic of her son in a buggy with the caption "my lil man! xx"

Hes four for crying out loud! In a buggy in his school uniform! The buggy looks way too small for him and hes capable of running and walking so god knows why she still pushes him around everywhere!
Irishguy123
26-09-2013
Originally Posted by MissPinotGrigio:
“Ditto. I had a FB-enabled school reunion at the end of August and out of the 15 of us there were only 3 I had the time of day for and these are friends who are in my "regular rotation" (excuse the phrase but I'm from Ireland, but live in the UK so don't see them as frequently).

Especially when one of them squealed "Oh I love your FB posts, you're just like Bridget Jones or one of them crazy girls!"



Oh, and (rant continues) the rest of them couldn't speak about anything other than their kids. Please let me never be that person, oh I won't, because I'm not having them! Ever.”

There's a back-handed compliment if ever I heard one!

Originally Posted by Sexbomb:
“Another person posting a pic of there baby scan

PS: facebooks layout has changed yet again so another ”

I see nothing wrong with this.
(Unless it's like a scan update every week or something )

Originally Posted by garyessex:
“Uh oh this status is causing a bit of a stir on my timeline

People who are "Full time mummys" seem to spend an awful lot of time on Facebook.”

Hear hear!
Irishguy123
26-09-2013
Originally Posted by Irishguy123:
“Funny thing is, all the "forana's" probably have better Enlgish than she does ”

Just noticed my typo, too late to edit
Smiley433
26-09-2013
"Don't you just love friends who are soooooooooooo fake NOT. Love the fact facebook has a block button lol xx"

But not as good as the "unfriend" button.
stirlingguy1
26-09-2013
Anyone have the link to this hotpants girl on Facebook, I could do with a laugh?
Jambo_c
26-09-2013
Originally Posted by Irishguy123:
“
"Another person posting a pic of there baby scan"

I see nothing wrong with this.
(Unless it's like a scan update every week or something )

”

But they all look the same,it's a weird blurry black and white blob. If you mixed a load of scan pictures up, nobody would be able to pick out their own. I'm not even bothered by my own babies scan picture so I sure as hell don't give a crap about other peoples. Just write a post saying that you're having a baby.

Had yet another "Happy 4th birthday to my beautiful daughter". I just cannot see the point. It's the equivalent of writing a card to your daughter and then giving it to a random stranger.
chandlerp
26-09-2013
Originally Posted by Tt88:
“Someone just uploaded a pic of her son in a buggy with the caption "my lil man! xx"

Hes four for crying out loud! In a buggy in his school uniform! The buggy looks way too small for him and hes capable of running and walking so god knows why she still pushes him around everywhere!”

Some serious bullying to be contended with if he is being delivered to school in a buggy. Kids remember that shit.
MissPinotGrigio
26-09-2013
Originally Posted by stirlingguy1:
“Anyone have the link to this hotpants girl on Facebook, I could do with a laugh?”

Nice try, perv!
los.kav
26-09-2013
Originally Posted by Irishguy123:
“Just noticed my typo, too late to edit ”

You could have got away with it by pretending to be ironic.
MarzBar85
26-09-2013
Originally Posted by Jambo_c:
“But they all look the same,it's a weird blurry black and white blob. If you mixed a load of scan pictures up, nobody would be able to pick out their own. I'm not even bothered by my own babies scan picture so I sure as hell don't give a crap about other peoples. Just write a post saying that you're having a baby.

Had yet another "Happy 4th birthday to my beautiful daughter". I just cannot see the point. It's the equivalent of writing a card to your daughter and then giving it to a random stranger. ”

Agreed with that! Then the 'where has the time gone?!'

A friend's sister had a baby about a year ago, since then her updates are all about her son. Fair enough. She's said on numerous occasions 'My son is my life!!!' and 'My life is complete.' She's been dating a guy for about 2 weeks now - the other night her update was 'My life is finally complete now' Her new fella and she kept exchanging messages, til her sister chipped in 'Aren't you two together??' She replied 'Lol, Yeah, we're in bed!! Lol!' Really?!

Someone has started doing these 'another fabulous weekend. Highlights include x, y, and z' No one replies so she tries again - I loved doing x, y and z at the weekend, maybe I'll try a, b, and c next weekend!'
MikeySaint859
26-09-2013
Originally Posted by los.kav:
“I had a friend who posted that it was her baby's six month birthday. They had a party and everything. That's not a thing, is it? If it is, I'm 30 and six months and I demand a party!”

Well, these brain dead morons need something to keep them entertained. If they hadn't been celebrating the baby's "six month day" they'd probably have been in town, as usual, slopping beer down themselves, screaming abuse at people and hoiking up their tops to exhibit their breasts. At least their self-indulgent and pointless party might have kept them off the streets for one night.
MikeySaint859
26-09-2013
Originally Posted by Leicester_Hunk:
“Soooo happy at the moment )))

Someone posts this over and over again, then another time she's constantly whingeing about how fed up she is”

The "Sooooo happy" posts will be when she is sitting red-faced and drunk on her settee, trying to work out why she is simultaneously drunk and bored.

Surely being drunk is all about good times? Okay, better post on Facebook that I'm "sooooooo happy" - that should convince me that I am.

Her fed up moments will be when she hasn't got money for drink, or when she's spending the day vomiting and nursing a hangover.


Originally Posted by Tt88:
“Someone just uploaded a pic of her son in a buggy with the caption "my lil man! xx"

Hes four for crying out loud! In a buggy in his school uniform! The buggy looks way too small for him and hes capable of running and walking so god knows why she still pushes him around everywhere!”

He'll still be sitting in it when he's fourteen, and his mum will still be uploading her "My lil man" pics to Facebook.

Originally Posted by stirlingguy1:
“Anyone have the link to this hotpants girl on Facebook, I could do with a laugh?”

Originally Posted by MissPinotGrigio:
“Nice try, perv!”

Haha!
D_bot
26-09-2013
^^^ slight alcohol obsession? Need a vodka?!
Kiko H Fan
26-09-2013
Originally Posted by stirlingguy1:
“Anyone have the link to this hotpants girl on Facebook, I could do with a laugh?”

I'm sure there are plenty like her on there. It shouldn't take you long to find one.
MikeySaint859
26-09-2013
Originally Posted by D_bot:
“^^^ slight alcohol obsession? Need a vodka?!”

You're drunk, aren't you.
burton07
26-09-2013
The FB posts that annoy me most are when someone puts a word in front of the word "times". As in:
"happy times" or "sad times" or "drunk times".
bookaddict
26-09-2013
Originally Posted by paperplanes_:
“It’s not abut de kissing, holdin hands, de d8s, de sex, and showin off. It’s abut been with su1 ho makes u happii in a way that no1 else can. It’s abot being with some1 hoo accepts u and ur werdnss. It’s about bein ureslef around dem and dey can be deir self around you. HAPPIII EIGHT MONFF ANNVERSAY BABY...


The definition of anniversary from Wiki: An anniversary is a day that commemorates or celebrates a past event that occurred on the same date of the year as the initial event.(Hence annunally)


For God's sake.”

The whole anniversary thing to celebrate a random amount of time you've been with someone annoys me generally. I mean you don't celebrate your birthday again just because its 23 days since your last one!

Also, the writing on that status gave me a headache! Why change 'happy' to 'happiiii'.....it is not even quicker to type!
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