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Worst Facebook status updates (Part 2)


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Old 18-04-2015, 21:23
grimtales1
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There's this really lonely guy who constantly posts shit like
"Sigh I am still single"
"Why am I alone. I am a nice caring boy"
"Going to die a fat virgin"

I feel like paying for a hooker just to shut him up.
That could be why he's probably not getting any if he's fat/obese
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Old 18-04-2015, 21:43
Frankie_Little
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Its a bit hypocritical of me to say this as I feel lonely sometimes too, but "nice guys" constantly moaning all the time annoy me! Dont know why
Guys that proclaim to be 'nice' are usually anything but.

http://geekfeminism.wikia.com/wiki/Nice_Guy_syndrome
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Old 18-04-2015, 21:46
Sweetums
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Totally agree. And the thing that gets me about all these silly selfie us that not one person is actually looking at the camera; their eyes are always very slightly off centre because they're staring at the image of their idiotic faces on their phone screens rather than the actual camera lens.
95% of selfies look so ugly and/or stupid to me for exactly this reason. Then there is the dreaded duck pout. Why does everyone think selfies are cool?
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Old 18-04-2015, 23:14
grimtales1
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Guys that proclaim to be 'nice' are usually anything but.

http://geekfeminism.wikia.com/wiki/Nice_Guy_syndrome
I can relate to a few of those, does that make me an asshole?
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Old 19-04-2015, 08:37
paperplanes_
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I can relate to a few of those, does that make me an asshole?
As long as you don't go around calling women who won't date you sluts and blaming them for not throwing themselves at you, you're probably okay.



That could be why he's probably not getting any if he's fat/obese
He also has a really creepy personality.

Its a bit hypocritical of me to say this as I feel lonely sometimes too, but "nice guys" constantly moaning all the time annoy me! Dont know why
I get bored of being single but "Nice Guys" take it to a whole other level. It's constant...he actually has a tshirt that says "Young, hot and single" which he wears. In public. I used to work with him and he wore it to work.

I have a friend who does that, constantly berating himself and his lack of luck in loving - maybe it's the same chap? Does your bloke's name begin with M? If so, I'll go halves on the prozzie.
Nah this guys name begins with T. Gutted, I could have saved myself a couple of quid
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Old 19-04-2015, 09:00
Frankie_Little
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I can relate to a few of those, does that make me an asshole?
There's a difference between being nice and being a Nice Guy. I'm pretty sure you're in the first category, Grim, you don't come across as raging against humanity because life is so unfair.

Back on topic, someone on my Facebook this morning has simply posted
No doubt there will be plenty of"wots up hun?" over the course of the day.
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Old 19-04-2015, 23:46
Sifter22
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I cud react to ppl bulls**tin bwt me bt the fact they felt the need to do this says mor bwt they issues & life then it does mine. Im too busy living my life to care. Plz feel free to pass this on to them cos i jst dnt av the time to waste.

Got lots of 'whts up hun?' 'welcome to my world hun' 'you're the better person hun'


Naturally she didn't bother replying to all those kind words.
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Old 20-04-2015, 07:07
solarflare
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I cud react to ppl bulls**tin bwt me bt the fact they felt the need to do this says mor bwt they issues & life then it does mine. Im too busy living my life to care. Plz feel free to pass this on to them cos i jst dnt av the time to waste.

Got lots of 'whts up hun?' 'welcome to my world hun' 'you're the better person hun'


Naturally she didn't bother replying to all those kind words.
I suppose it's not worth pointing out that she wasn't too busy living her life not to care to post that...
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Old 20-04-2015, 13:50
cas116
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I cud react to ppl bulls**tin bwt me bt the fact they felt the need to do this says mor bwt they issues & life then it does mine. Im too busy living my life to care. Plz feel free to pass this on to them cos i jst dnt av the time to waste.

Got lots of 'whts up hun?' 'welcome to my world hun' 'you're the better person hun'


Naturally she didn't bother replying to all those kind words.
Apparently she doesn't have the time to use the required number of vowels or anything remotely approaching normal English either.
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Old 23-04-2015, 12:57
My Sweet Life
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A photo that has been shared:

"If u find the angry face then ull get gl for 7 months Iff u find the odd 1 out ull get gl for 7 yrs u have 70 secs to share this or u will have bad luck for 10yrs"

Next to a picture of emoticons. She also writes her status updates using a similar sort of writing style. I'm so tempted to comment with links to local literacy classes.
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Old 23-04-2015, 13:16
Jason100
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When people check themselves in to their local hospital fishing for likes.
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Old 23-04-2015, 14:00
hobbleit
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"Facebook wants to ban this picture" followed by a picture of a knight wearing a cross of St. George.

Somehow I don't think an American based company gives a flying fig about banning it.
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Old 23-04-2015, 14:01
rumpleteazer
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"Facebook wants to ban this picture" followed by a picture of a knight wearing a cross of St. George.

Somehow I don't think an American based company gives a flying fig about banning it.
I've not seen that one, hilarious
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Old 23-04-2015, 14:01
grimtales1
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"Facebook wants to ban this picture" followed by a picture of a knight wearing a cross of St. George.

Somehow I don't think an American based company gives a flying fig about banning it.
Sounds like something Britain First would post.
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Old 24-04-2015, 13:46
BellaRosa
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Someone is not happy I am sure who she is aiming it at is not even on her friends list so will not even see it

She started this yesterday and still going on and on and on ......


"funny hw if smeone didnt love u in the first place they wouldnt of tryed to find u. Wanna b with u at every opitunity. N thats just for starters

I think sme bitch nds to grow the fck up n relise u would always b second best to me always hve n always will b.

If u carnt take the punch in the mouth n the truth let me gve u a punch n u will really relise

If he didnt still want me why is he telling me diffrent. It was never one sided n u just carnt relise he always wanted n did mre with me then u ever wanted u oversly wasnt enough no matter what u tryed or tryed to demand

Sme fat bitch must think im stupid well think again u fat slag

When he gt with me he upgraded nt dwn graded u skank

Do what u do best lie on ur back and let the boys ur shagggin roll u in flour n aim for the damp patch all ur ever b knwn for u fat dirty slag

Think u better gt ur facts right u skank. N while im at it i was single when ur man was wantin me sayin he loved me n sleepin with me. U two was over he was just gttin rid of u

Ouch the truth hurts doesnt it bitch. U was the one who shagged bout n fcked up. Dnt try n put me in the same level as u. Remember this he wanted chased loved n still does love me. He wanted to live together we gt engaged n tryed planned pregancy together. Yes we hve had our problems between us n from other ppl. But why u feel the need to try bulshit n cause shit is beyond me. Stop beein a druggy skanky slag n gt a life that doesnt invole bn on ur back. N stop the hell away from me. U hve always bn jel of me n the fact he wanted a future with me n still does n he never would or intended to commit to u.

N by the way no matter what happens or i choose to do its my life"


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Old 24-04-2015, 19:25
Goaty
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I notice some friends merge into a single Facebook profile with their partners after few months into relationship? Very strange! I can't post to their page as not know whose I am talk to!
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Old 24-04-2015, 19:26
James Frederick
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I notice some friends merge into a single Facebook profile with their partners after few months into relationship? Very strange! I can't post to their page as not know whose I am talk to!
Didn't even know you could do that.
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Old 24-04-2015, 19:33
Tt88
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From a woman on my facebook (background info shes 25, her bf is 30 and they have 3 kids. Neither of them have worked more than a month during their adult life)

On one of those comment page things titled "what would you do if you won the lottery?" Her response: "be able to afford a house where the kids have a room each, afford driving lessons and go on a family holiday".

Surely if either her or her partner (or both) got a job then they could afford to do all of the above without the need to win the lottery?
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Old 26-04-2015, 09:55
shmisk
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this morning lots of people seem to have reposted a picture of dead baby twins on my feed

why would anyone do that?
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Old 26-04-2015, 12:24
Libitina
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Someone is not happy I am sure who she is aiming it at is not even on her friends list so will not even see it

She started this yesterday and still going on and on and on ......


"funny hw if smeone didnt love u in the first place they wouldnt of tryed to find u. Wanna b with u at every opitunity. N thats just for starters


<snip>



N by the way no matter what happens or i choose to do its my life"


I'm sure it must be my age (44), but it takes me about four times longer to read that than it would do if it was written out fully in non text speak. So I don't bother. Surely I'm not the only one?

Not a dig at Bellarosa btw, just the original author.
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Old 26-04-2015, 12:36
Ed R.Marley
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this morning lots of people seem to have reposted a picture of dead baby twins on my feed

why would anyone do that?
Because they're thick as pigshit
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Old 27-04-2015, 12:04
Tt88
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The woman in the on off on off on off engagement has just out some of her bridesmaids dresses up for sale (retail price of course even though theyre second hand!)

Why?

Apparently it seems some of the bridesmaids have had enough off her calling the wedding off, canceling and rearranging dates so theyve pulled out now rather than trying to keep up with the latest is it on? Is it off debacle via facebook!

In addition the bride to be is also very annoyed that some of her family arent going. That would be understandable if it wasnt for last month when she threatened to attack them if they dared show their faces on her big day!
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Old 27-04-2015, 14:18
latinloulou
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I'm beginning to feel rather left out as I don't have any of this drama on my FB feed

I am however, getting very cheesed off with all the "she put this in the microwave and you'll never guess what happened" sort of posts but I suppose it's (marginally) better than some who are still insisting I'm (a) interested enough & (b) thick enough to believe that they get bored, cover themselves in butter and slide along the kitchen floor pretending to be a slug
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Old 27-04-2015, 15:42
Jason100
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One of many silly posts from this user on my timeline:

"OH MY GOD!
GO!
MOVE!
WALK!
GO!
GO!
I HATE YOU ALL!
MOVE!


- Me, stuck in the aisle, trying to get off the bus/train"
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Old 28-04-2015, 16:08
Alan1981
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Facebook these days just seem to be Click bait ads or people trying to sell herbal life/ fuel additives /perfume or forver living health products. And today someone has started badgering me to buy vaping products
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