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Worst Facebook status updates (Part 2)


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Old 12-05-2016, 08:35
TrollHunter
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She does this at least twice a week. Why in hell would you want to put your dirty laundry all over Facebook like that? It's cringe worthy in the extreme.
Desperate need for attention?
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Old 12-05-2016, 13:49
cas116
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Everyone might want to delete Facebook! Seems to be a new fad 'motherhood Dare' post a pic of your kid. Yawn 😴 Like people don't do that every day anyway. What a bore.
They are driving me mad. How is it a dare? How is it a challenge?
I really don't mind people putting pics of their kids on Facebook but this is a daft spin on it.
Still seeing lots of the copy and pasted ones with the usual 'let's see which friends do this blah blah blah' rubbish. .

And the current one that's driving me mad is the photo of a pint on a sunny day with something like 'RIP the British Summer, 07/05/16 to 09/05/2016' on it. Bog off, IT'S STILL SPRING! MAY IS NOT SUMMER! I haven't actually done a shouty reply to anyone yet but I'm on the brink
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Old 13-05-2016, 15:42
mrsmoose
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Little Miss attention Seeker on mine has surpassed herself.
She had to go to hospital and took a photo of her arm with a cannula in with morphine going into her.

The very next day, I was in hospital with chest pains and had to have a Cannula, not once did I think "OMG I need to post a pic of this to Facebook!", I was more concerned about what was wrong with me and how I couldn't move my damn arm because it was so uncomfortable, I just kept thinking about this photo she had uploaded the day before and thought how utterly attention seeky it was!
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Old 21-05-2016, 21:20
Jason100
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Has anyone tried the new Facebook live app? It appears to be used by mostly teenage girls who don't understand how to use the privacy settings. I ended up watching a live stream near Bradford where some older foreign bloke from Casablanca kept saying that he wanted to marry the both of them and fight for them until the near death. He even went as far as adding one of the lasses on their snapchat.

They kept getting excited when their view count went up but when they asked who was watching, if someone they didn't know typed a comment to them they were suddenly like "who are you, I don't him/her" or "get off our live stream you pervert"
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Old 22-05-2016, 01:20
Lyceum
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Had this gem pop up on my feed tonight. Have read it three times and I'm still non the wiser.


'Got me gawk niece stayin Tonyt, she's gabbed the legal of me, tellin me she Cnt wait til she get a bf haha AV just nearly strangled her, she on her way out now tho all redy 4 the fair Tomoz'
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Old 22-05-2016, 06:33
himerus
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Had this gem pop up on my feed tonight. Have read it three times and I'm still non the wiser.


'Got me gawk niece stayin Tonyt, she's gabbed the legal of me, tellin me she Cnt wait til she get a bf haha AV just nearly strangled her, she on her way out now tho all redy 4 the fair Tomoz'
I assume that this is a coded message from Outer Mongolia.
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Old 22-05-2016, 06:45
Cornish_Piskie
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Just seen this one on my feed just now

Cant believe just been caught having a wank by my mate
At least he didn't whip his out and join you. Or did he.........??

Or did you mean that a third party walked in on you and your mate while he was polishing your porky in his palm...?



Ambiguous statements: They can cause embarrassment.
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Old 22-05-2016, 12:58
Lowri_J
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Status : Sooooooooo fed up!

Comment : Awh hun what's up? x

Reply : Don't want to talk about it hun. x

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Old 22-05-2016, 13:29
GamerGirl
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I only have around 15 people that I know (mostly close family) on the despised FB .

I would love to slow the flood of baby pics from one person, stop the food pr0n from another and never see the 'inspirational' quotes from someone else...but I can't ignore them completely and even feel forced to Like some of the posts occasionally .

Do. Not. Want. but can't leave...... yet.
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Old 22-05-2016, 13:36
Tiger Rag
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Status : Sooooooooo fed up!

Comment : Awh hun what's up? x

Reply : Don't want to talk about it hun. x

A relative does this a lot.

I'm not sure that I should really admit this one:
I once posted that I claimed that Cardiff was in England. To make that slightly worse, we hadn't that ong visited Cardiff, and yes, I did see that some of the signs were in Welsh... My friend just looked at me, rolls his eyes and tells me that Cardiff is in a different country.
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Old 22-05-2016, 13:46
Lowri_J
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A relative does this a lot.

I'm not sure that I should really admit this one:
I once posted that I claimed that Cardiff was in England. To make that slightly worse, we hadn't that ong visited Cardiff, and yes, I did see that some of the signs were in Welsh... My friend just looked at me, rolls his eyes and tells me that Cardiff is in a different country.
Well we all make mistakes.
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Old 22-05-2016, 16:39
tartan-belle
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I've been feeling a bit with life recently but found this thread and it's hilarious.

My own contributions: I'm at the stage of life where people are having children. While I like my friends and children is REALLY wish you could hide/unfollow picture albums because I don't need to see a 'day in the life of child' every single day!!

There's someone on my FB who refreshingly does not post pictures of her kids or if she does, it's not of them themselves, it's like a schoolbag/shoes for the oldest starting school.

Another one is I have a friend who #everything #so #many #times #on #every #facebook #status. I do like a good # but more than 3 is far too many!!
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Old 22-05-2016, 17:54
SuperAPJ
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'Got me gawk niece stayin Tonyt, she's gabbed the legal of me, tellin me she Cnt wait til she get a bf haha AV just nearly strangled her, she on her way out now tho all redy 4 the fair Tomoz'
At first I thought that meant the niece has snatched her legal 'high' drugs! I'm guessing she means she's talking too much.

'Gawk' might be a mispelling of 'gawj' as in 'gawjuss'.
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Old 23-05-2016, 20:07
ChrisJamesSats
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I've come to hate the word 'ladies' because of Facebook.

"Ladies!!! I'm placing orders for amazing toothpaste let me know what your wantingxxxx"
"Ladies!!!!! I was stopped by a male in his 30s offering a balloon to my precious Chantelle-Mae please share!!xxxxx"
"Let's all do the motherhood challenge!! I DARE you to put a picture of your amazing kids on Facebook. I will tag some other fabulous mothers to rise to the challenge. Come on ladiessss!! I cudnt off done it without the support of you fellow mothers!xxxxxx"
"Bully challenge time ladiess!! Let's post an ugly chavvy picture of ourselves five years ago before we had four kids to four different men and an ugly chavvy picture of ourselves now with our precious darlings in the background!! You'll be amazed at the 'woaaah' reaction from other ladiessss!!xxx"

'Ladies' to me now just means single, chavvy, unemployed mothers.
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Old 23-05-2016, 20:13
Relly
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At first I thought that meant the niece has snatched her legal 'high' drugs! I'm guessing she means she's talking too much.

'Gawk' might be a mispelling of 'gawj' as in 'gawjuss'.
I reckon you're right. It seems to mean "...gabbed the legs off me". I suppose it's more polite than saying, "...gabbed the arse off me," which is what we say around our way.
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Old 23-05-2016, 22:46
GamerGirl
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Had one of those crap 'Amen' things appear today because some nitwit decided to jump on that bandwagon.

I've decided that I 've been inspired by some of the posters on here and I shall begin replying with snarky comments for things like that
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Old 23-05-2016, 22:51
maidinscotland
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A Facebook friend regularly makes posts like 'you never know when someone has depression cos we don't ask for help' etc. Tonight she posted a long status but the gist of it was 'Did you know the people that are the strongest are usually the most sensitive?
Did you know the people who exhibit the most kindness are the first to get mistreated? Did you know the ones who take care of others all the time are usually the ones who need it the most? Did you know the three hardest things to say are I love you, I'm sorry, and help me? '

My fingers were poised to type 'YES!! Because you constantly tell us!'............but I resisted the temptation.
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Old 24-05-2016, 00:22
Alan1981
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I've come to hate the word 'ladies' because of Facebook.

"Ladies!!! I'm placing orders for amazing toothpaste let me know what your wantingxxxx"
I had someone remove me after I made a sarcastic comment about some magical aloe vera toothpaste that she bombarded people with about 15 times a day.
Aloe vera toothpaste. Aloe vera drink. Aloe vera cream. Aloe vera shampoo and you can make ££££ as well by pressurising your friends and family to buy and sell it 15 times a day.
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Old 24-05-2016, 06:25
Tiger Rag
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Does anyone else have that friend who constantly whinges about shit their life is? it's stuff they can do things about as well. We had this discussion on FB last week. One of my friends has been told she has fibromyalgia and now amongst other things, has to have accupuncture. I then replied and said I agreed with her, having just learnt within the last few days that one of my friends has died. She leaves behind 2 young children.
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Old 24-05-2016, 18:53
tartan-belle
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A friend posted:

i know nobody will read my status but sometimes when I'm bored, I get wrapped up in my tutu, put a giant horn on my head, lather sparkles all over myself and prance around the kitchen pretending I'm a magical unicorn!

Massive eyeroll
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Old 24-05-2016, 19:41
Lyceum
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At first I thought that meant the niece has snatched her legal 'high' drugs! I'm guessing she means she's talking too much.

'Gawk' might be a mispelling of 'gawj' as in 'gawjuss'.
I was being a tad sarcastic saying I didn't know what it meant.

I genuinely can not abide the use of the bastardisation (I refuse to call it a word) gawj or gawjuss.

I'm not exaggerating when I say I could quite happily punch anyone who uses that word in the throat. It sets my teeth on edge. I see it as the height of sheer thickness and utter laziness.

Did I mention it really annoys me?
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Old 24-05-2016, 22:14
grimtales1
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People on FB who use words like "Lulz!" and "Lulzabub", WTF?
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Old 25-05-2016, 09:29
TrollHunter
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A friend posted:

i know nobody will read my status but sometimes when I'm bored, I get wrapped up in my tutu, put a giant horn on my head, lather sparkles all over myself and prance around the kitchen pretending I'm a magical unicorn!

Massive eyeroll
That's just the latest copy and paste status/comment that s̶h̶e̶e̶p̶ i̶d̶i̶o̶t̶s̶ people are posting. I say it's the latest but it originated in 2015 and was one of these supposed viral things. If you comment, you invariably get the following response:
As per the rules! Dear fellow unicorn I am really, really sorry. I have lost at this game and now so have you! You liked or commented on my status so you must now post the following message as your status to continue the game for Breast Cancer Awareness (unless you have lost your sense of humour). [followed by aforementioned status update]
Oh, didn't I mention. It's to raise awareness of Breast Cancer (now you can insert a rolleyes smilie)
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Old 25-05-2016, 09:40
rumpleteazer
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That's just the latest copy and paste status/comment that s̶h̶e̶e̶p̶ i̶d̶i̶o̶t̶s̶ people are posting. I say it's the latest but it originated in 2015 and was one of these supposed viral things. If you comment, you invariably get the following response:


Oh, didn't I mention. It's to raise awareness of Breast Cancer (now you can insert a rolleyes smilie)
These things infuriate me. Firstly how is it raising awareness for breast cancer if no-one knows its about breast cancer until they receive a second message.

Secondly why is it always breast cancer. I'm not saying breast cancer awareness isn't important but of all the cancers I think it's safe to say we're all aware of it. How about a bit more awareness for other forms of cancer? My Nanny died of oesophageal cancer, something I had never heard of before she was diagnosed. If more forms of cancer and the symptoms were made more well known perhaps people would catch them quicker and less people would die.

Rant over, it's been one of those days and it's not even 10 o'clock yet
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Old 25-05-2016, 22:07
Jarrow Lad
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"how can anyone appear on BRITONS GOT TALANT but cant speak a word of engish ????"

I'd like to think this was irony but suspect it wasn't !
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