In soaps (mainly) cost never seems to be mentioned. If someone wants to buy property they usually write it down to show the person they are talking to, or worse still no money is mentioned. Take Emmerdale this week, Andy says he is undercharging for some stables, no mention by how much or how much more is owed, and the girl being talked to just replies "I will bring more money next time". Wouldn't she want to know ???

Same goes for wages, everyone excepts a job without asking for wages, or if they do they are told "it'll be enough". I have heard this countless times. "Bloke walks in to pub in a soap, asks for a job, they say yes, you can start right away, person wanting job agrees and starts working". Without even knowing the wages ????

The only time money is mentioned is when tens of thousands are used or something goes wrong so that "where is the other thousand" can be mentioned by the person being ripped off.

Also why is it that a stranger can walk in to a pub and ask for a pint and the barmaid/man just gets them a pint without asking if they want lager, beer, or cider, let alone the makes of the drink.

Also some things I have always wondered about Eastenders..........

1. Why can't anyone ever get a job outside of their own street ??? Even though they have a tube station and bus stop right on their doorstep ? All these people who probably can get well paid jobs end up working at the chippy or video shop for minimum pay. I mean Pat was in dire straits desperate for a job and even begging her enemy for a job (a year or so back now) as she had been left penniless. Yet she only asked people in the street, I mean for heavens sakes, there must have been a cleaning job or something somewhere in a 10 mile radius, without needing to resort to ask your most hated enemy (at the time). Surely Eastenders can afford external sets ?? We nearly had a winner when Kate arrived, she worked at a whole new place, the police station, but wait, it wasn't in the street, so she had to give up and get a shop, yep, in the street.

2. An oldie I know, but why the hell don't they own any washing machines ?

3. Why does everyone eat in the cafe even though they live less then 4 doors down from it ? Why do they also go mad if the cafe is shut ? Also why is the cafe so damn small (and how the hell Oz cabs was ever run from there I will never know).

4. How did Nana moon manage to have a brain operation without having her head shaved at all ? Also why does Nana Moon even exist ?

I am sure there are many more

You make all the points I have wondered myself. How come no-one ever watches Coronation Street too?

And what's all this with everyone falling over themselves to buy drinks at the pub? Even if in the previous scene they've said the were broke.

I remember in Eastenders when there was Dr Legg everyone was going to the doctors then suddenly they reduced the use of that set no-one was ill for months on end.

Bizarre soap world!

Noone ever watches telly, noone ever mentions world events, not even Diana's death or sommat, no wars, just goes to prove ITS NOT REAL.

Heck remember the BIG news it was when they managed to 'tie in' a couple of major footy matches i.e reality into the procedings. Still didn't stop everyone having the usual crises and panics. Don't let anything like that get in the way.

No one works they are only ever seen being STOPPED from working, someone has their head in a car in the garage and someone dashes in and stops the car being worked on. Even in pubs and cafe people are only ever interrupted when taking an order.

As for washing machines AND dishwashers these days I may have the answer, they make too much noise, though they are suspiciously silent in the laundrette, tv doesn't like background noise like that.

Ah, the mysteries of soaps eh!

There are even more interesting things to watch out for.

Many years ago at school, we were told by the English teacher that if an extra says even a single word, they have to be paid at a much higher rate. He told us to watch soaps and see if we could spot instances where they were cutting costs.

Sure enough, if you watched corrie, every time they cut to the news shop (cabin?), the person serving would be saying something to a departing (non main cast member) customer who would nod, or raise a hand. The customer never said a word.

I'm sure you can still see numerous examples of this penny pinching going on.

Yeah, I have seen the "extra" syndrome loads of times, people just nodding or shaking their heads. I seem to remember once a cast member was really angry with a extra character (in the storyline) and all the extra could do was frown and shake his head, in reality you would answer back of course, not just take abuse and walk away silently. Seems like Tracey behind the bar has been an extra for years, no matter who owns the pub, or if they need extra staff, there she is. Also the cafe worker extra who wore HEADPHONES just so they had an excuse why she was silent most of the time. Who wears headphones while working in a cafe ???

Also who looks/looked after Ians kids when he was/is in the pub ? When he was single he was in the pub most nights. The only time a babysitter is ever mentioned is if something is going to go wrong when that babysitter is left alone with the kids.

What a good thread.

In Eastenders they _do_ sometimes watch the TV.

But none of them own washing machines, as you said, which I find very amusing

Yeah cracking stuff really. I've often wondered these things. Another instance is the "MINUTE MART is the only shop in the world so weekly or daily shopping has to be done in there and my fave even if it is old is the washing machines, 21st century and not one person owns one. Don't forget they're all going to spontainously combust as no one ever goes to the toilet!

Haha, yeah, the Minute Mart. That is similar to what I mention about the Cafe, even though everyone lives in the street, they go mad and queue up outside for ages if it is closed, yet all they have to do is walk 2 metres down the road to their front door. With the Minute Mart no one would be able to live, seems they are the only place who sells food. People say "I am off shopping" and all they do is go to the Minute Mart and then the stalls on the market, geeze.

Have they even explained Spencer's disapearing act ? Obviously there was little they could do to stop that, but so far I have heard some lame excuse that Alfie sent him somewhere, god knows where, considering they were pretty much begging on the street a few days earlier. Also isn't Ian concerned his manager has gone ? Also don't get me started on Sam working in the chippy, as if, she could just jump on the bus or tube to another job.

If Ian is such a big shot why does he only ever buy places in the street ? He was eurphoric about getting the chance to buy the Arches, but I am sure there are 100s of places outside the square that would have been better business. No doubt now the nail bar is free he will look at buying that, for heavens sakes. I live in a housing estate, I hardly look out the window at number 15 (for instance) and think what a great place to buy to expand my business.

I love these kind of threads.

When something dramatic happens in the queen vic or the rovers return, or theres a fight, or someone unexpected walks through the door, and it all goes deathly quiet.......who turns off the jukebox?

You're bang on there! It always happens! I even say to my other half get ready for the jukebox to go off!

With the cafe as well it's always extra extra busy when they're short staffed all everyone ques back to Walford East trainstation! see its so big must be a walford central and walford west!

And then the moment the argument is over, as if by magic the jukebox starts up again and everybody carries on talking as though nothing has happened.
Does anybody know a public house where this happens?!

Actually, if a stranger walks into the pub in the village where my parents live, it does go all silent and strange for a moment, but thats more Little Britain/Fast Show than Soapland.

Another Great Soap Mystery*

Why are people from Walford obsessed with Spain? Anything goes wrong, they're off to Spain even if the thing that is wrong is that they are in huge debt and going to be hunted down and killed by a debt collector, they still ship off to Spain in a black cab. Where do they get the money for the ticket? Or the cab? And how does Kat/Sharon/Sam/Zoe/Kelly/Vicki/Pat/Peggy manage to fit their massive wardrobes into one teensy suitcase? How do they get the plane tickets so quickly?

And why is it always Spain?

Three locations exist outside Walford: Leicester, Manchester and Spain.

Also how did the Slaters once house Kelly, Zoe, Little Mo, Lynne, Gary, Mo, Charlie, and Kat ? That is 6 bedrooms if you count Kelly/Zoe sharing and Lynne/Gary sharing as it is very doubtful any of the others would have shared together. Same goes for the Vic, it is a one floor flat, yet they have managed to have loads of people staying at once. I think Kat, Zoe, Nana Moon, Alfie, and Spencer were all living there at one point.

If they turn the telly on (which we know is very rare) they happen to tune in on something on the News that is relevant to the plot, the "TV announcer" then says something like "In other news....." and the TV instantly gets turned off.
Also, the amount of food/drink that get ordered and then after 1 mouthful of it they make a quick exit.

Brighton too, another popular one.

But only when there are gay characters in the show.

Otherwise it drops off the map.

And they once did discover a vortex to a parallel universe Ireland.

Up West, Down South, Manchester, Spain, Scotland (New Year). LOL.

Where did Kate go ? I seem to remember her going to work in the police again, which is yet another case of "characters in square can't have outside jobs", I mean the police station she used to work at is meant to only be a few miles away, couldn't she of still lived in the square and worked there ??

In Brookside, Barry and Terry would always be watching "The Magic Rabbits". Was that an early 90's satellite thing, is it out on DVD?

Ha ha! Her boss told her he was moving his new police team--or whatever they are--to Brighton! I wonder how the council feels about that?

This is a great thread, but it is shattering some of my blissful illusions of EE. I always think about this stuff, but it takes the fun out of it. The way I see it--the Square just "is the way it is".

Yeah, it's in a box set with the CD of Smelly Cat, and the complete first series of Itchy and Scratchy

Four, they went to Ireland once I remember because the BBC got into trouble for suggesting that the Irish were a bunch of comical drunks.
Last edited by {ph[oe]nix} : 02-02-2005 at 10:43