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Old 01-10-2013, 11:36
Jessica_Hamby
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Each judge is assigned a foreign accent at the first audition and has to speak in that accent until the end of the series.

Louis Walsh gets gratuitously slapped in the face once every episode.

Contestants on live shows are allowed to try to put each other off.

Judges have to use a dalek voicechanger when sending people home.

Dermott has to wear a chicken suit.

Louis gets a face tattoo which reads "Walshatron 5000".
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Old 01-10-2013, 11:48
Jessica_Hamby
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Any pause in a sentence announcing a contestant's fate should be filled by giving the announcer an electric shock lasting as long as the pause.
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Old 01-10-2013, 12:03
paperplanes_
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Contestants have to perform in front of the judges who are allowed to make the contestant feel awkward (i.e singing along, dancing, getting their lighters out)

Louis is only allowed to speak in song lyrics

Gary has to speak in riddles for the rest of the show "Riddle me this riddle me that, a contestant has fallen but who will it be," etc

Sharon must actually take over 'Mother' role and spoon feed Giles during the ad breaks

Nicole to dress up as a different superhero every single week and remain in character.

Contestants must choose who they boot off the seats. As well as nominating their own personal worst performances of the night.

Theme song night where contestants must perform Doctor Who theme, Game of Thrones theme etc etc in full costume.

An actual cliche klaxon is placed into the stage. This klaxon will be the inception noise. "I want to be the next Take That" *INCEPTION NOISE* "I'm doing this for my goldfish" *BRAAAAAAAWRRRHMMMM*

Deadlock to be settled by a tug of war.

Caroline, Matt and Dermot all must act as if they are in a musical at all times.

Also: Have Steve Brookstein on the end of the stage reacting in real time....call it Steve-Cam
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Old 01-10-2013, 12:41
Mr_Eye
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Show a test card for 3 hours instead.
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Old 01-10-2013, 12:51
gazzathered
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Show a test card for 3 hours instead.
I agree with this post......
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Old 01-10-2013, 13:30
Jessica_Hamby
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Gary has to speak in riddles for the rest of the show "Riddle me this riddle me that, a contestant has fallen but who will it be," etc
Yes. And he has to wear a hat and those long pointy shoes, both made of coloured felt and with bells on them and carry a pigs bladder on a stick that he waves about to emphasise his points and bonks people on the head with.


An actual cliche klaxon is placed into the stage. This klaxon will be the inception noise. "I want to be the next Take That" *INCEPTION NOISE* "I'm doing this for my goldfish" *BRAAAAAAAWRRRHMMMM*
Genius. I wish I'd thought of this. It should have been brought in a long time ago.

Deadlock to be settled by a tug of war.
Or some sort of endurance competition. Certainly if they've been voted so low then no-one really wants to hear them again.

Also: Have Steve Brookstein on the end of the stage reacting in real time....call it Steve-Cam
Oh yes please. Dermott saying "Let's have a loook at the reaction from Steve-Cam" would achieve cult status.
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Old 01-10-2013, 13:31
earldbest
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In case of deadlock, make the surviving contestants vote. Only refer to the public vote if this fails to give a majority.

Before the start of a live show, randomly choose a judge whose vote will count thrice as much for the week, then reveal who it is after they've voted in the showdown.

Reset the vote count in the middle of the voting period.

Attach polygraphs to the judges so people will see if they're lying with their critiques. Don't let them know about it.

Have a rap week where the acts rap, except the "urban" acts who will sing ballads.
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Old 01-10-2013, 14:25
bionicfrank
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the sing off is decided, not by a sing off, but by jumping over a tank full of sharks on a motorbike whilst blindfolded. the bottom 2 acts keep jumping the shark until one of them lands in the tank....
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Old 01-10-2013, 14:35
ChloeBobbyLexi
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1) Think they should all have 1 boy, 1 girl, 1 overs and 1 group...
2)They should have a member of the public every week sit on the panel and give a honest appraisal of how the show actually went and let them choose who goes after the sing off....
3) Scrap the theme weeks (except for maybe the group song if they want a theme) let them sing the type of song they would release so they can grow, and then there will be no acts vulnerable to certain genres...
4) Scrap the novelty act.. if you cannot sing to a standard good enough to be on tv you should be let go at the auditions..
5) Get Keith Lemon to present the show..
6) get the judges to take notes so they know what they have said to acts... cos they are forever contradicting themselves!!
7) Scrap the Judges houses.. cos it is pointless!!! And this visa lark is not helping.. how can they put a group through to JH when they lost a member cos of it? read there is 2 there this year 1 member short....
8) **** it scrap the show.. fed up of the fix factor!
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Old 01-10-2013, 14:40
earldbest
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1) Think they should all have 1 boy, 1 girl, 1 overs and 1 group...
2)They should have a member of the public every week sit on the panel and give a honest appraisal of how the show actually went and let them choose who goes after the sing off....
3) Scrap the theme weeks (except for maybe the group song if they want a theme) let them sing the type of song they would release so they can grow, and then there will be no acts vulnerable to certain genres...
4) Scrap the novelty act.. if you cannot sing to a standard good enough to be on tv you should be let go at the auditions..
5) Get Keith Lemon to present the show..
6) get the judges to take notes so they know what they have said to acts... cos they are forever contradicting themselves!!
7) Scrap the Judges houses.. cos it is pointless!!! And this visa lark is not helping.. how can they put a group through to JH when they lost a member cos of it? read there is 2 there this year 1 member short....
8) **** it scrap the show.. fed up of the fix factor!
One member of "the public"? This sounds like America's Next Top Model adding "social media scores" in their criteria: a disaster.
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Old 01-10-2013, 14:43
Jessica_Hamby
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They should have a member of the public every week sit on the panel and give a honest appraisal of how the show actually went
This would be hilarious. Can you imagine?

"World class? WORLD EFFING CLASS? Are you deaf? She sounded like a cow giving birth and as for the dancing.... She looked like a dog having a difficult sh*t."


Scrap the theme weeks (except for maybe the group song if they want a theme) let them sing the type of song they would release so they can grow, and then there will be no acts vulnerable to certain genres.
This is actually a good idea (which is kind of against the spirit of the thread but never mind). I don't like the theme weeks at all. We're not looking an all rounder. We're looking for a pop star.
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Old 01-10-2013, 15:27
LW09
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Scrap the chairs and replace them with trap doors.

Also, and they'd be able to sign up Lily Allen if they did this as it was her idea, they should do a pop songs in a foreign language theme.
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Old 01-10-2013, 16:19
paperplanes_
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5) Get Keith Lemon to present the show..
Yes! "Roll VT, that stands for Video Tape" at the start of every act
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Old 01-10-2013, 16:32
julie2009
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Contestants have to perform in front of the judges who are allowed to make the contestant feel awkward (i.e singing along, dancing, getting their lighters out)

Louis is only allowed to speak in song lyrics

Gary has to speak in riddles for the rest of the show "Riddle me this riddle me that, a contestant has fallen but who will it be," etc

Sharon must actually take over 'Mother' role and spoon feed Giles during the ad breaks

Nicole to dress up as a different superhero every single week and remain in character.

Contestants must choose who they boot off the seats. As well as nominating their own personal worst performances of the night.

Theme song night where contestants must perform Doctor Who theme, Game of Thrones theme etc etc in full costume.

An actual cliche klaxon is placed into the stage. This klaxon will be the inception noise. "I want to be the next Take That" *INCEPTION NOISE* "I'm doing this for my goldfish" *BRAAAAAAAWRRRHMMMM*

Deadlock to be settled by a tug of war.

Caroline, Matt and Dermot all must act as if they are in a musical at all times.

Also: Have Steve Brookstein on the end of the stage reacting in real time....call it Steve-Cam
Love your suggestions. Only thing is I think Nicole would be up for that suggestion dressing up as a super hero every week - wonder woman all the way.
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Old 01-10-2013, 16:34
julie2009
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In case of deadlock, make the surviving contestants vote. Only refer to the public vote if this fails to give a majority.

Before the start of a live show, randomly choose a judge whose vote will count thrice as much for the week, then reveal who it is after they've voted in the showdown.

Reset the vote count in the middle of the voting period.

Attach polygraphs to the judges so people will see if they're lying with their critiques. Don't let them know about it.

Have a rap week where the acts rap, except the "urban" acts who will sing ballads.
Why not have a bit of yodelling to go with it.
I am sure the guy the other night would win it hands down.

Like the idea about the polygraphs though
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Old 01-10-2013, 16:36
julie2009
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the sing off is decided, not by a sing off, but by jumping over a tank full of sharks on a motorbike whilst blindfolded. the bottom 2 acts keep jumping the shark until one of them lands in the tank....
i am laughing my leg off at these suggestions.

We are an evil lot sometimes.

Don't let Simon know about that one it could become his top act for the next series of BGT
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Old 01-10-2013, 16:41
paperplanes_
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Love your suggestions. Only thing is I think Nicole would be up for that suggestion dressing up as a super hero every week - wonder woman all the way.
I think she'd make a convincing Batgirl



Oh to add to mine: The Winners Song should be this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cvDkpga4Grs
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Old 01-10-2013, 22:57
bionicfrank
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1)
5) Get Keith Lemon to present the show..
!
yeah that would be the death knell. I cant figure out ITVs obsession with this moron. is he supposed to be funny or something
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