Originally Posted by SusieSagitarius:
“He's fearful because he doesn't think he deserves her. Aunt Ruth got it right. In everyday stuff, he dances around her a lot. Only in dire circumstances, can he move past his fear as we've seen a few times (rescuing the baby, L having the baby, after Holly's accident).”
I agree that Aunt Ruth did get it right. I wonder if that is part of the reason that he concealed his anxiety about his health/phobia from her -- that if she knew how "weak" and vulnerable he was, she would realize that he in fact did not deserve her.
Meanwhile, I guess we are left to surmise that Louisa believes that his withdrawal and shut down is about his unhappiness with her and their marriage, and that belief is behind her decision to leave him.
But this is the point about which I really have problems with Louisa this series, and what the creative powers that be have done with the plot. (I don't find Louisa "shrewish" -- frustrated and snappish sometimes, but not shrewish.)
It seems inherently implausible that Louisa could believe that in the space of roughly 3 months after the wedding, that her husband could regret their marriage and/or stop loving her. Because that's just not a credible scenario, which Louisa, aside from the necessity of the plot, would have recognized.
But leaving aside whether or not it's plausible, if that's what we are meant to believe, it suggests that we also have to think that Louisa is either remarkably insecure, or very self-centered (because in fact, it's not always about her, contrary to this belief) or both. And that really doesn't fit with the way that Louisa has been presented prior to this.
And what I really have problems with, is that she flips from wanting to go away with him for a long weekend, trying to console him and get him to open up, right to "I'm outta here. With your son. " Surely, there's a middle ground before she bails -- namely, a conversation where she tells him that they cannot continue like this, that he has to share with her what the problem is -- either decide that it can be fixed or not, but unless he can begin to open up to her, she'll have to think seriously about whether they can stay together. As shaken and contrite as he was after the accident, I think that might have begun a process that ultimately would have brought them to a better place.
But the fact is that she did not do that -- that she made a unilateral decision, without any further input from him, based largely on a misjudgment (apparently) of what was going on with him, on a matter that affected them both, deeply. Shrewishness or not -- that's a minor issue to me. The impulsive decision basically to take their son and abandon her husband in the midst of a breakdown (hateful Margaret had it right in this instance) is what I fault her for. And I don't like that they made Louisa into someone who would do this.
I know this is awfully censorious and judgmental of me, and actually, I feel bad about that, but that's how I've been feeling about Louisa, so I thought I would just get it off my chest!