. I love your posts Sally. Shame there are not more like you.

Go Sophie , Brendan was so patronising and came across as a right prat .

I didn't really notice that comment but he is becoming nauseating with his comments about Sophie. I prefer the relationships where there's a bit of banter rather than him fawning (sp) all over her.

Just imagine being on the receiving end of someone gushing all over you in that over-weening patronising way at every opportunity. Makes my skin crawl and makes me like Sophie more and Brendan less lol.

I really like Sophie and after that Charleston, I was really excited for her and I liked her partnership with Brendan but I have gone right off him again. His bleating on ITT when marks didn't go his way - Sophie looks uncomfortable a lot of the time - he needs to learn when to keep it shut.

Well, he can come and gush all over me anytime he wants. He is fab.

She may be popular with her fellow contestants, but I don't think she's a favourite with the judges, nor the camera crew.

The judges seem to mark her down for the slightest thing, then mark up others who may have made the exact same error in their dancing. And as for camera shots, I don't think she gets so many as most of the others.

BIB - I think this is true of many comments about Strictly.

Three examples:

Ben - somebody (a self styled expert) commented that he was executing quite competent dance moves on Saturday; I saw a big bloke lumbering about with a frenetic pole dancer twirling around him

Susannah - more than one person has stated that she was just stomping around and gurning; I saw a terrific dramatic Paso in which Susannah played her part extremely well (but KFG deserves huge credit for the work he has done with her.)

Natalie - 3 of the judges saw perfection; I saw a pretty forgettable Charleston with poor timing.

But I suppose if we all agreed that we just see what we want to see, this forum wouldn't have a lot to talk about!

Brendan can't help shoehorning in these gushy over the top speeches when either he is desperate for votes or the dance hasn't gone as well as he hoped. Usually he gets away with it but he was floundering badly on Saturday night and I think more people saw it for what it was. He made himself look a right pillock and ended up just bouncing on the spot like a bunny having a breakdown.

I'm sure Sophie was only joking but the tedium of being called " his girl " or " my girl " must have got to her.

It was probably the 'little girl' that made the 34 year old mum of 3 think - hold on

She is not a morning person?

This. ^^

I wonder if Sophie's husband might have something to do with the lack of chemistry. In one of the training videos a while ago, he seemed uncomfortable with Brendan holding Sophie in a more intimate way and even said something like do you need to hold her that way?

Do you think her husband has put his foot down and doesn't want Sophie and Brendan developing any kind of relationship?

Gosh Brendan has got very worthy & preachy this year. He never misses an opportunity to drone on. Sophie's interjection was perfectly timed & much needed. It was her version of 'whatever'

Do you think this happens even 1% as often?

Tee hee! When he started speaking I was already squirming on his behalf . Good on Sophie for putting a pin in his balloon (affectionately or otherwise ). I think Brendan sees himself as a bit of an 'elder statesman' amongst the pros and wants to say something profound or make these grand gesture speeches on everyone's behalf. Sadly he's not very eloquent and just affles and caffles and makes himself a bit ridiculous. Funny though

Karen from The Apprentice talked about 'the boys'.

Abbey in the week one show before her waltz talked about the 'hot one from the boys' if I recalled.

I am sure Claudia did the same during her stint in ITT...

Real life examples I have heard it. But how can I prove it here?

I think it happens all the time both ways. If it feels more patronising going in one direction, it's probably to do with the (perceived) balance of power in society at large or in a particular group (in the sense that it's hard to patronise someone of higher 'status' unless you know their achilles heel). In Brendan's case though, 'girls' might have been fine but little girls was just plain cringe. (And boys as an afterthought when he realised he'd gone down a silly path and couldn't go back )

Did they use the term little boys ? Then Brendan called her his little girl .

There is no (perceived) about it.

This is just a silly show and a silly man of course, but don't for an instant think it's always silliness.

I don't disagree "little girl" is OTT?

I was originally responding to peeve's post:

BIB That depends on the society or sub-group and who's doing the perceiving . I have a friend who maintains it's impossible to be patronised unless you allow yourself to be - as in, if you feel no inequality or inadequacy, other people may look down their noses at you or attempt to diminish you, but if you're confident and care not what they think, it's irrelevant. I don't entirely agree, but it's an interesting perspective

I don't agree either.
But then my experience is not positive... and that feels more like being blamed for it.


Actually i can't even find the words for what i'm trying to say. It's just not as simple as your friend seems to suggest.

I'm sorry you've had a bad experience . I've probably oversimplified what she means (and as I say, it isn't my view, but I think there's something in it worth thinking about). So if someone makes a patronising remark, it doesn't mean they are not being mean or rude and that you have no reason to be offended, but that if you feel diminished by what they say, that comes from your own view of yourself or your own sensitivities. A bit harsh, perhaps, and I daresay, depends very much on the situation and the people .... (If someone knows just where to stick the knife in to deliberately make a person feel inadequate, they're doing something much nastier than being patronising imo ).

Not saying this applies in Sophie's case, but I agree with your explanation (with some teeny reservations). My dad (bless his soul) always told me "don't let them get you no matter what they say". Wise words...