I have now sadly, come to a decision that my cat's tail needs to be amputated. I am looking for advice or experience about the best way to deal with it, for him and me.

BEFORE you reply, please consider this, of course I will ask the vet and go there, that's not in question. So that suggestion is not needed, however well meant. (The vet has been in consultation all along)
Secondly, the issue about my cat has been on another thread, potted history he got hit by a car, broke his pelvis and had 'tail pull' which has left him incontinent. Issues about 'quality of life' and having him PTS have been extensively discussed, the same vet that suggested PTS a couple of months ago now says 'no' and congratulated us, and him, for how well he is.

The issue now is that he has 'found his feet' and I cannot stop him jumping over the fence (His pelvis is better LOL), and I have to wash his tail daily but he gets uncomfortable when I get near his bum. So, he has no feeling in his tail, he tries to groom it but the wee and poo gets caught in it and it's too much for him, and if he is out his tail may get trapped or something.(He is not a 'house cat' and certainly his quality of life will be affected if I try to keep him in)

So, my main question is what to expect when he has his tail amputated? Will he have to stay in for a while? How do they adjust? Will he miss it even though he can't feel it? Is there anything I need to consider to help him? Will it be stitches, or glue, will he need to wear a collar? Will he have full anaesthetic? I'm also sad that this will have to happen, as it is selfish of me to not want his tail off, but I have come to terms that it is the best thing for him.
Experiences and advice would be appreciated. Thanks.

Our late cat had his tail amputated as he had a broken vertebrate in it and kept biting it.

I understand that it's a tricky operation, one vet had a go and it didn't work, they caused more damage and we changed vets and had to go through it again so it's a decision not to be taken lightly and, whilst you've said you'll see vet advice, please do. Be 100% that it's appropriate.

Recovery was for several weeks, your cat will have a tiny shaven stump that will be bandaged and he'll have to wear a collar for a while and be kept indoors during that time with the collar on. He will have general anaesthetic.

This was about 10 years ago and Shadow (hence my name here!) died from renal failure and old age, not his tail. But it was a big thing to go through.

Thanks for this. I do trust the vet as they have been very good with him so far. It is a decision I am not taking lightly, I need to know what will happen, so I know what to expect. And how to deal with it. In the circmstances I still feel it is the right decision even though it hurts.
And sorry to hear about Shadow.

One of my previous cats had to have her tail amputated following an abscess. This was probably about 15 years ago, so to be honest, I don't really remember the recovery process, but once it was healed, there was no problem. It didn't affect her at all, either in communication (her little stump would still wag when she was displeased!) or balance. She died 3 years ago aged about 13, so lived most of her life tail-less.

I'm sure your cat will find things much easier to manage without a tail.

My cat had her tail amputated when she was quite young, so about 15 years ago now. She came home with it sort of hanging and we could only guess that she'd got it trapped somewhere. She had to have about 2/3 amputated.
I don't remember a huge amount about the time immediately following the procedure, but I don't remember it being especially difficult. She had a collar and her tail took a little while to heal. It was stitched rather than glued but as I say, this was a while ago so things may be different now. We just had to make sure that it was kept clean and that she was keeping ok. It never really affected her after it was healed and she didn't seem to have any problem with getting used to it.

Glad to hear that your cat is doing well, this tail issue aside

Aarggh, got reset as I was trying to post. Anyway, I trust my vet as he saw Brian from the start. Thank you for all your posts, they helped a lot. I have taken advise and he will have the operation as soon as possible, within the next few days.

Cats adapt incredibly quickly.

My 14 odd (exact age unknown, she was a stray) year old mog had to have one of her rear legs amputated about 3 weeks ago and she's pretty much back to her old self, if a little less spritely. She was a house cat anyway which probably helps but she didn't even have to wear a collar. Left the stitches pretty much alone until they came out after two weeks.

So, once again thanks for all your replies, it made me more prepared about what to expect. The vet said pretty much what most of you said, he had his pre op consultation today, and is booked in for Tuesday for the op. I feel very sad, but it has to be done for his benefit. At least he is alive,

Loads of love to Brian, i'm sure his op will be fine.
I think most of the time we worry about them more than we need to and if they could talk they would tell us to chill out lol

I am sure he will be fine too. Cats seem to adapt incredibly easily. My cat lost half her tail years ago due to an accident. There was no option - the damaged part was cold and dead and got the chop. I remember her wearing a collar for a week, but after that - no problems. Also - in my extended family, two cats both lost a leg (different families and locations) and both lived an active life for many years. One of them was actually a pretty good mouser!

My Roger had his tail off last year in similarish circumstances...he had a broken pelvis as well and was in a cage with a collar on and yowled for 6 weeks. He is fine now and looks a bit like a bunny from behind when he runs. Hope Brian is ok