Sorry to inform you Emma haters but she now has a record deal. Simon Cowell has heard her and he has signed her..................

The above post must be a wind up.

As usual.

Observant FMs would know who "kazzor" really is!

Comes out to defend/push/publicise the super-talentless and gobby Emma Greenwood and to simultaneously rubbish Victor. Originally claimed to be Emma's mum.

she's got many different personalities depending on the circumstances when I want to read some rubbish I look out for her posts!

Looks like we have our next nominee for the Naomi singing award then .... a bigger singing star than Nadia



And I had thought that Simon had more sense than that ... did he give her a contract as part of a joke or bet?

April 1 (April Fools' day) is still to come!

Did Simon get his dates mixed up?

i think she is emmas mum!
congrats to emma! She does have a really good voice

She isn't.....she hasn't....

Purleeze. If we're gonna do this, let's do it right.

Simon Cowell was walking down a corridor of a recording studio one day and the voice of an angel reached his ear.

"Who is that?" he demanded gruffly, as is his way. "That voice, it's the best I have ever heard or I'm ever likely to hear. I'm going to sign whoever that is and I'm going to do it right now, whatever it takes! Who is she?!"

His entourage were unable to answer Simon's question so he quickened his pace and finally arrived at a slightly ajar door, leading into a small recording room.

He gasped. Not only was the creature before him blessed with the most amazing voice, she had a beauty seldom seen outside of pages of glossy fashion magazines. His eyes travelled up and down her body. "Damn, you're perfect," he growled, sensing his pulse quicken at the discovery that he was just about to sign the most beautiful woman ever created who just happened to be called Emma Greenwood - the most amazingly appropriate name for anyone wanting to break into showbusiness. It was too good to be true.

"Right," Simon's voice was tense. The negotiations were about to being. "How much will it take? Will you sign with me if I offer you a three album deal worth a million?"

"No," the soft, perfectly formed lips uttered. "I know my worth. Please don't insult me with such a pathetic offer."

"You're right," Simon blushed at his own stupidity. "How about five albums and 5 million?"

"No," the shiny hair swung around the graceful shoulders as Emma shook her lovely head.

"Okay," Simon sighed, "I'll give you the best deal in the whole world, ever. A 500 album deal worth 1.83 billion pounds. I know," he looked deep into her eyes, "that you'll be worth every penny."

"Okay," Emma nodded, her razor sharp brain calculating what such an amount would do for her life... but then she stopped. "One thing Simon. It is a fantastic deal and I think both you and I know that every single and album I make will reach the number one spot in record time. Also, that all my singles and albums will remain at their number one spots for a record amount of time. But that's not important right now. What's important is to say that I want all the money I make to go to charity. Not only am I beautiful, smart and talented, but my heart is made of gold. I think the selling of my suitcase on Ebay and donating a proportion of the money to charity amply demonstrated that. This time, all the money must go to the needy. All of it!"

Simon was gobsmacked. She was right!

"Emma," he shouted with mounting excitement, "I have so much to learn from you! From now on all the money I make will also go to charity. And I will also convince all my rich friends to do the same."

And so it was that Emma Greenwood single-handedly solved all the world's problems while becoming the best selling recording artist of all time.

The End

yes...sure.. and you got yourself banned for that.
nice one

Oh . I'll never find out if she liked my story...

well i did. and im sure that once kazzor looks up all the big words she will like it too

Thank you.

Emma's got a record deal? I thought she already had one and was working on her album with Whitney Houston's producer?

I personally can't wait to hear her work with the huge fanbase she has I'm sure she'll reach top 100! I bet Jim's yellow website is hysterical at this news I reckon it'll probably reach meltdown

I've just been to have a look but it's down. Probably crashed because of the number of hits it was getting.

I owe Jim a pint when she gets to number one. A duet with Whitney would be nice.

Whats the site name Jim has for Emma?

I agree it definately must have collapsed due to demand surely Jim wouldn't have got fed up and ditched Emma in favour of some other reality TV star

Not Jim Floyd. It would be nice if he popped back for a chat. I might mail him once the site has recovered from the stampede.

Stewart249 - it's www.emma-greenwood.net It's very yellow.

It would be lovely to hear from him I don't think I'll pester him though because he's likely to be so busy leading up to the launch of the new single. I mean he'll have webchats to organise and parties organised by magazines to go to, poor Jim it must be all go at the moment BB will be back in a few months so we'll probably hear from him on day2 when he launches his website dedicated to one of the next HM's

Try http://www.officialemma.com/index2.html
From this site:

Great, Jim is still alive and kicking afterall I love it how Emma keeps it real and still takes time to chat to the legions of fans, can't you just tell this is Emma and no hoax....

Helloooooooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Its Me emxxxxxxxxxx
Am so sorry i havent been replying i lov u all xxxxx
Av been so biz its mad ness i lov u all and wish i could speck to u gys more x
Am going to start coming on to the sight and have a lagh with u all. My cussan comes on the beb sight Karl greenwood ,am still her and still loving life i wont to thank everone hew is on the sight and to jim lov u all loads and loads sorry about the spelling am crap!!! lots of love and snogs em xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Just seen this at the bottom of other webpages on that site (Pity it's not on the news page!)


Read into that what you will

Oh right That'll mean there'll be no album in the immediate future then

Oh ye of little faith! Emma's website was definitely working when I went there a few minutes ago.

However, at the foot of the forum index page on the site there is the following information: "Most users ever online was 22 on Thu Aug 19, 2004 4:37 pm." A mere 22? I fear that even the eternally optimistic Jim Floyd must surely be losing heart...

Incidentally, those who remember Emma's charity parachute jump for Mencap will be heartened to learn that the total raised online was a marvellous £102 (or, with tax relief, £122.87), while the total raised offline was an impressive £0.00!

(But seriously though, it's surprising just how little was actually raised. Surely, despite Emma's fine words about how close the Mencap cause is to her heart, there can't have been too much effort put into the fund-raising?)

Details at
http://www.justgiving.com/emmagreenwood

That was the day Jim organised a webchat and Emma forgot to turn up