Derek caused the volcano to erupt in Pompeii. He'd just found out that Alice had slept with Michael.
The Derek Branning in every bloody SL thread......
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Originally Posted by maurice45:
“Derek caused the volcano to erupt in Pompeii. He'd just found out that Alice had slept with Michael.”
“Derek caused the volcano to erupt in Pompeii. He'd just found out that Alice had slept with Michael.”
Derek caused the extinction of all the dinosaurs, they caught a whiff of his greasey hair and they all killed themselves to get away from the smell.
Originally Posted by T.K. Mazin:
“Derek gave birth to Piers Morgan.
”
“Derek gave birth to Piers Morgan.
”
I KNEW it! 
Derek is the reason Simon Cowell is so bitter. See, when Simon Cowell was just starting out and needed a loan to kick-start his business...
Originally Posted by Scrabbler:
“Derek caused the extinction of all the dinosaurs, they caught a whiff of his greasey hair and they all killed themselves to get away from the smell.”
“Derek caused the extinction of all the dinosaurs, they caught a whiff of his greasey hair and they all killed themselves to get away from the smell.”
Originally Posted by J-B:
“Never forget the order of Henry VIII's wives:
Divorced, beheaded, died, divorced, derek, survived.”
“Never forget the order of Henry VIII's wives:
Divorced, beheaded, died, divorced, derek, survived.”
Originally Posted by Scrabbler:
“Derek and Jack were actually Laurel and Hardy.”
“Derek and Jack were actually Laurel and Hardy.”
Derek shot the sherrif. He then had the deputy relate the news so Bob Marley could write his song.
it was actually Derek who set Zainab on fire in Pakistan. Yusuf just took the credit for it just as Jim took credit for locking Max in the coffin 
.
.
Originally Posted by sorcha_healy27:
“Derek created the world in 7 days”
“Derek created the world in 7 days”
I think you will find that was me.
Actually it couldn't have been because I'd have created Adam and Steve not Adam and Eve.
Originally Posted by sorcha_healy27:
“Derek created the world in 7 days”
“Derek created the world in 7 days”
Day 1: let there be faaamily!
Originally Posted by maurice45:
“Derek caused the volcano to erupt in Pompeii. He'd just found out that Alice had slept with Michael.”
“Derek caused the volcano to erupt in Pompeii. He'd just found out that Alice had slept with Michael.”
When Derek fiddled, Rome burned
Originally Posted by maurice45:
“Day 1: let there be faaamily!”
“Day 1: let there be faaamily!”
Day 2: Let there be "just a little bitta' respect."
Originally Posted by Scrabbler:
“I think you will find that was me.
Actually it couldn't have been because I'd have created Adam and Steve not Adam and Eve.”
“I think you will find that was me.
Actually it couldn't have been because I'd have created Adam and Steve not Adam and Eve.
”
And the serpent tempted me to sin. All it took was a packet of B&H and a glass of prosecco
Originally Posted by T.K. Mazin:
“Derek is the douche banker on Deal Or No Deal”
“Derek is the douche banker on Deal Or No Deal”
Derek is Noel's father.
Can't forget Mel Gibson's epic speech in his biopic of the life and work of Derek Branning:
"Ya' can take our lives, but ya'll never take My Alice!
"
"Ya' can take our lives, but ya'll never take My Alice!
"
Originally Posted by sorcha_healy27:
“[/b]
And the serpent tempted me to sin. All it took was a packet of B&H and a glass of prosecco”
“[/b]
And the serpent tempted me to sin. All it took was a packet of B&H and a glass of prosecco
”
Derek slapped David Cameron so hard he made is forehead 7 inches bigger .
I knew there was a reason why Cameron's forehead was so big
.I knew there was a reason why Cameron's forehead was so big
Derek was the true author of the Harry Potter series, he let JK take the credit. Peter Pettigrew was based on himself.
Derek beat up Ghandi and set him on fire. What an unfair fight I tell you. Everybody knows Ghandi would never fight back. I guess it's the only way Derek can win a fight .
.
Originally Posted by Scrabbler:
“Derek was the true author of the Harry Potter series, he let JK take the credit. Peter Pettigrew was based on himself.”
“Derek was the true author of the Harry Potter series, he let JK take the credit. Peter Pettigrew was based on himself.”
He was Wormtail but aspired to be Severus. However, he got so upset that Severus Snape turned out to be such a popular character that he went on to write Twilight.
Realising Twilight was rubbish, he went nuts and began his rape escapade through Walford.
Originally Posted by J-B:
“Can't forget Mel Gibson's epic speech in his biopic of the life and work of Derek Branning:
"Ya' can take our lives, but ya'll never take My Alice!"”
“Can't forget Mel Gibson's epic speech in his biopic of the life and work of Derek Branning:
"Ya' can take our lives, but ya'll never take My Alice!
"”
Derek Branning is the reason Leo DiCaprio didnt win the Oscar
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