I'm beginning to believe King Philth is threatened by the local hard man Alfie Moon. He wants him on side so that he can keep his King of the Square title for as long as possible until the inevitable happens and Alfie claims it for himself.

I wouldn't want to be in an alleyway at night with Alfie Moon. The amount of shirts he would try and flog would be unbearable

This thread has made me laugh so hard and in my opinion it's way too late at night for that Saying that it's the only plausible reason why Phil would rope him in to be his henchman that I can think of, maybe Phil witnessed Alfie flogging that spare stock the other day and decided it best to keep him on side

Alfie fights dirty, everyone knows that. He uses his ridiculous shirts to blind his opponent and then proceeds to beat the crap out of them.

I'm still pondering why Alfie was standing there with Phil trying to look all moral when his other half tried to send down the lovely innocent Alice.

Or that only a few weeks before that he was fleecing women of their money.

What makes you say that? I must have missed something?! Please elaborate. What's happened between the two of them?

#Memory like a goldfish
Last edited by Pumuckl : 28-05-2014 at 01:00

Alfie told Max where he stands using his puppet Phil

Without a smidgen of a doubt Rob.

Phil only acted hard to Max to try and impress Alfie. It didn't work.

Philth is Alfie's bitch, just look at the way he waddles sometimes.

Alfie is really putting it to the poor bloke behind closed doors - he learned his technique from Derek!

I heard the next two handed will be Phil and Alfie facing off with each other.

Lmfao!

The OP is being sarcastic surely, otherwise no of course not!

No one is scared of Alfie and if they are I'll chin him for you!

Alfie Moon is MY bitch and nobody else's!

That scene in last Tuesday's ep where Phil and Alfie went to Max's and warned him to stay away from Ian and started dictating to him where he couldn't go, it was a farce.

The OP is being sarcastic, NO ONE is scared of Alfie apart from himself!

lol Alfie a hard man

Pmsl at the sarcasm in this thread!

Alfie hard? He couldn't be hard if he was reinforced with stainless steel!

He's as soft as shite!

The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was to convince the world he didn't exist

No!

Alfie's character is written as a soppy doormat, I hardly think DTC would turn him into the devil.

That scene in last Tues ep was just Alfie and Phil uniting against Max in aid of Ian, nothing more and it was farcical because they're sworn enemies under other circumstances Phil would have hammered Alfie into the ground and that doesn't take any effort when it's a soft arse like Alfie!

That's my bloody line!

Lol! Hang your washing on it!

Then he's got you right where he wants you. Max got the message - when Alfie told him that he doesn't stop for cups of tea, he didn't mean 'I'm not stopping for a cup of tea', he meant 'if I come in there I'm gonna drown you in a vat of tea and break every bone in your bald ginger body'.

That ginger baked bean alike won't take any notice of funny mr potato head and the fashion disaster on legs!

And Alfie can whistle for his tea!

Pmsl!

http://weknowmemes.com/generator/upl...9857853609.jpg

Silly? Well you're certainly not 'lion'!

Yes. I never have a 'giraffe' about these kind of things

lol