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The difference between a romance and a showmance...


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Old 17-07-2014, 23:40
who, me?
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...is being demonstrated by Steven and Christopher.

Showmancing is all about 'me'. It thrives on drama and power struggle.

Romancing is about caring how the other feels. It thrives on sensitivity and appreciation.

In a showmance, the other person is an object, a trophy.

In a romance, the other person is an 'other' with feelings.

In a showmance, one person is only interested in asking questions of the other when the outcome affects THEM.

In a romance, one person asks another questions because they are genuinely interested in the other person.

Showmancing rushes in. Romancing takes it slow.

I am glad that this difference is being so clearly demonstrated. Gives me hope!
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Old 17-07-2014, 23:44
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Absolutely OP. Mark and Christopher are natural. They actually look like thy enjoy each other's company. They flirt. They SMILE.

Contrast that with the bullsh*t that Steven and Kimberly have half-baked up. Jeez, there's no comparison.

I believe that Steven wants Kimberly as a trophy. And Kimberly USED to want Steven as a meal ticket, but now he's revealing himself to be such a nauseating, petulant, self pitying baby that she is starting to think he isn't even worth it.
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Old 17-07-2014, 23:49
CLL Dodge
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A showmance is a romance that is on a TV show.

That's all.
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Old 17-07-2014, 23:59
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Absolutely OP. Mark and Christopher are natural. They actually look like thy enjoy each other's company. They flirt. They SMILE.

Contrast that with the bullsh*t that Steven and Kimberly have half-baked up. Jeez, there's no comparison.

I believe that Steven wants Kimberly as a trophy. And Kimberly USED to want Steven as a meal ticket, but now he's revealing himself to be such a nauseating, petulant, self pitying baby that she is starting to think he isn't even worth it.
Agree. Though I don't think either Steven or Kimberly are consciously showmancing. Steven is enthralled by the idea of 'love' because 'love' means being at the centre of things. I think Kim was enthralled by Steven because he appeared to be all that she isnt - he shows emotion while she keeps her emotions buttoned up. It's what they say about 'other halves' - Steven and Kim are two half people looking for someoneto complete them. Christopher and Mark are coming together as two whole people who can enhance one another's lives.
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Old 18-07-2014, 00:01
Alrightmate
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Great post OP.

I think you've got it in a nutshell.

Most of the couplings on BB which have stood the test of time appear to have been slow burners, and also very awkward and clumsy. Just like real life.
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Old 18-07-2014, 00:02
Alrightmate
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A showmance is a romance that is on a TV show.

That's all.
I think that when people refer to a showmance they don't mean that it's a romance on a show, they mean it's a romance just for show.
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Old 18-07-2014, 00:03
cazziekay
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Absolutely OP. Mark and Christopher are natural. They actually look like thy enjoy each other's company. They flirt. They SMILE.

Contrast that with the bullsh*t that Steven and Kimberly have half-baked up. Jeez, there's no comparison.

I believe that Steven wants Kimberly as a trophy. And Kimberly USED to want Steven as a meal ticket, but now he's revealing himself to be such a nauseating, petulant, self pitying baby that she is starting to think he isn't even worth it.
Mark and Christopher as an example nothing genuine there. And Steve and Kim are not 'in love' there isn't even a friendship...false false false ...imo
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Old 18-07-2014, 00:06
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Great post OP.

I think you've got it in a nutshell.

Most of the couplings on BB which have stood the test of time appear to have been slow burners, and also very awkward and clumsy. Just like real life.
'awkward and clumsy' - exactly! That's what's so endearing about Christopherand Mark - they are trying to learn how to relate to one another but not always getting it 'right'.
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Old 18-07-2014, 00:08
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...is being demonstrated by Steven and Christopher.

Showmancing is all about 'me'. It thrives on drama and power struggle.

Romancing is about caring how the other feels. It thrives on sensitivity and appreciation.

In a showmance, the other person is an object, a trophy.

In a romance, the other person is an 'other' with feelings.

In a showmance, one person is only interested in asking questions of the other when the outcome affects THEM.

In a romance, one person asks another questions because they are genuinely interested in the other person.

Showmancing rushes in. Romancing takes it slow.

I am glad that this difference is being so clearly demonstrated. Gives me hope!
You could still see the show-mance as a real relationship that's dysfunctional. Especially if that viewer doesn't understand the concept of "the game"
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Old 18-07-2014, 00:11
Groundhogal
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Mark and Christopher as an example nothing genuine there. And Steve and Kim are not 'in love' there isn't even a friendship...false false false ...imo
I believe Christopher believes it's real but you just can't trust Mark. Jonty and Munkety Tunkety was a better love story than C&M.
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Old 18-07-2014, 00:14
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You could still see the show-mance as a real relationship that's dysfunctional. Especially if that viewer doesn't understand the concept of "the game"
Don't follow - say more?
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Old 18-07-2014, 00:43
Bacon&Eggs
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Showmancing is all about 'me'. It thrives on drama and power struggle.

Romancing is about caring how the other feels. It thrives on sensitivity and appreciation.
I agree a show-mance does that, but so does a genuine relationship which is dysfunctional, for example - Stee could be genuinely trying to control Kim because that is his nature as a person (scary bf). On the other hand he could just be "playing a game" (acting to create drama for our entertainment) perhaps the scaryness is the residual effect of trying to act a certain way.

How does one tell the difference? I know it's possible because you have imo correctly identified it as a show-mance as opposed to anything scarily real but the option is their to see it either way.
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Old 18-07-2014, 00:56
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Sometimes it is hard to tell. Like I thought for sure Aaron was using Faye for a showmance and yet they dated/moved in together (i don't know if they are still together) when they came out.
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Old 18-07-2014, 00:57
Richard_Smith4
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What i don't understand is when you go on Big Brother and you like someone why does it have to be for mag deals etc people IMO can fall in love on reality TV but get so much abuse i don't understand.
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Old 18-07-2014, 01:18
Bacon&Eggs
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Sometimes it is hard to tell. Like I thought for sure Aaron was using Faye for a showmance and yet they dated/moved in together (i don't know if they are still together) when they came out.
Perhaps he was using a girl he liked as part of a showmance, simple as that. I'v never understood why people use the fact that their still together as proof that he didn't use her.

I did underestimate his true feelings for Faye though.
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Old 18-07-2014, 01:26
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Good opening post. Despite what Luke said tonight on BBBOTS, and I take his point about Mark being desperate for fame, I do think that the relationship between Mark and Christopher seems genuine. They seem like an old married couple and there does seem to be real affection. I also see chemistry between Helen and Ash. But the thing with Kim and Steven has zero chemistry, it is cold and creepy.
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Old 18-07-2014, 11:34
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I agree a show-mance does that, but so does a genuine relationship which is dysfunctional, for example - Stee could be genuinely trying to control Kim because that is his nature as a person (scary bf). On the other hand he could just be "playing a game" (acting to create drama for our entertainment) perhaps the scaryness is the residual effect of trying to act a certain way.

How does one tell the difference? I know it's possible because you have imo correctly identified it as a show-mance as opposed to anything scarily real but the option is their to see it either way.
Good point. I thnk the Stephen/Kim relationship is dysfunctional - by which I would mean that they bring out the worst inone another, but it is also very influenced by the fact they are 'on show', which adds another dimension to their interractions because they know they are being watched and assessed.
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Old 18-07-2014, 11:37
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Good opening post. Despite what Luke said tonight on BBBOTS, and I take his point about Mark being desperate for fame, I do think that the relationship between Mark and Christopher seems genuine. They seem like an old married couple and there does seem to be real affection. I also see chemistry between Helen and Ash. But the thing with Kim and Steven has zero chemistry, it is cold and creepy.
Yes, Anthro, I thnk the same about Mark and Christopher. Hmm, intereseting about Ash and Helen - i see respect and affection, and Helen is undoubtedly attracted to Ash, but he seems very passive and I thnk just sees her as a mate.
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Old 18-07-2014, 11:40
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A romance to me, was Paul and Helen.......you could see they were attracted to each other.......it slowly built up and you could see how much they wanted to be with each other.........so much so that it lasted for a good time after they left.........not done just for the camera and mag deals and stories.......

I keep changing my mind on the Steven/Kim thing......think he does care about her, but sure it is not reciprocated.......
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Old 18-07-2014, 11:42
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Trouble is viewers generally don't have a very good record in telling the difference. They're far too influenced by whether or not they like the protagonists.

My default position is to give the benefit of the doubt.
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Old 18-07-2014, 11:44
Blondie X
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A romance is two people genuinely falling for each other - example is Helen and Paul

A showmance is people who may be attracted to each other but rush into things for screen time

A fauxmance is two people who wouldn't touch each other with a bargepole off camera but get together just to get camera time and lie back and think of the magazine deals
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Old 18-07-2014, 11:49
who, me?
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A romance is two people genuinely falling for each other - example is Helen and Paul

A showmance is people who may be attracted to each other but rush into things for screen time

A fauxmance is two people who wouldn't touch each other with a bargepole off camera but get together just to get camera time and lie back and think of the magazine deals
Great descriptions!
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Old 18-07-2014, 11:55
Richard_Smith4
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A romance is two people genuinely falling for each other - example is Helen and Paul

A showmance is people who may be attracted to each other but rush into things for screen time

A fauxmance is two people who wouldn't touch each other with a bargepole off camera but get together just to get camera time and lie back and think of the magazine deals
Very good post and this is how i see it Blondie
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Old 18-07-2014, 12:18
sheils1
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Wow alot of experts on here lmao.
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Old 18-07-2014, 12:20
didgital_spy
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Showmance - Pretend relationship just for show
Fauxmance - Pretend relationship for other reasons - perhaps getting a passport?
Blowmance - Sex acts based relationship
Woemance - A sad relationship where nother ever seems to go well
Homance - Returning to the same prostitute regularly
Nomance - Not currently in a relationship
Slowmance - A relationship that builds slowly over time, often starting out as a friendship
Flowmance - A very natural relationship that comes almost without noticing
Growmance - A love the gets deeper all the time
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