Imagine James Jordan and Peter Andre engaged in a battle of wits - that really would be the definition of unarmed combat.
Give it a while and Pdull will be denying he said any such thing, and it will be blamed on malevolent, jealous strangers trying to cause trouble. ( AKA the 99.999% of people who aren't Pdull fans).



I guarantee it will be topless, and the cringiest, cheesiest thing ever to be seen on Strictly. It will make the Vorderumba look classy, sensual and erotic.
I don't really know how to explain it in dance terms, but for me the difference between Jay and Peter is that Jay seems to take on the character of the dance he's doing and becomes completely absorbed by it, whereas Peter just learns the steps and gallops about the dance floor being absorbed by Peter Andre.
( I've just read that back and it makes no sense at all - if anyone can work out what the heck I'm on about could you let me know? )

Tranquilliser gun, please

Right-o, how many darts would you like with that?

The night that P'duh does his rumba is the night that I'm opting for an alcohol induced coma

Please tell me that's not true!
Jack Sparrow is sex on legs. Peter is bromide on stumps.
Can you imagine the eyeliner overload?
I suppose it could be worse though - at least it's not anything from Dirty Dancing, or the pottery scene from Ghost. Unless Peter's playing the inanimate lump of clay.

No, I get that, Jay looked completely in the dance, the audience was irrelevant


For me or him

Ten, please.

(Five for P.Duh. Five for me in case the first five don't work on him)

I'm thinking 'charming'

It does make sense... that is, it made sense once I'd stopped retching at the thought of topless P'duh

It's the night I phone Dignitas

Hardly the Algonquin Round Table, eh?

Unfortunate but true, DS has been reporting it as direct from Peter himself.

Perhaps we should come up with alternative options? Like the inanimate lump of clay.

It's so inevitable that he's going to do one .

Well, it might fall on 80s night, and they'll have him in a mullet? Or perhaps someone with a sense of humour will make him do it to A Whole New World?

I'm not actually sure I can watch it, whatever the getup or music. *shudder*

He might achieve the impossible: if I'm subjected to his sex face, I might actually manage to summon up an atom of sympathy for Pwicey

I honestly think those two are as appalling as each other, he's just had better PR since the split.

You just know he won't duck the rhumba, just so he can show us his super, sexy sincere sex faces *throws up slightly*

Seeing as he's a huge Wacko Jacko fan, Peter could do his rumba to 'Ben', with Janette dressed as a rat.
I think he may chicken out and refuse to unleash his orange moobs on the viewing public. He'll say it's out of deference to his new wife, and because he doesn't want to drive the women of Britain into a sex crazed frenzy, but it'll really be because he doesn't want to be unfavourably compared to Alijaz. Or Artem. Or Gavin.

It may bum Gavin's cred if I remind you he said he did not want to be eliminated the week his idol, one P. Andre Esq, was a guest on the show....

Too many to quote, but you guys are flipping hilarious - unarmed combat! Tranx for him and you! Digitas!

lump of clay!



Thanks for giving my manic Monday a lift...

Like Pduh's shoes.

Meh I saw that I felt he was doing irony

Actually every idol has to have feet of clay, but oh Gavin

Noooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!

(To be fair, they are roughly the same colour.)

Yeah. Let's go with irony. And then never speak of it again.

Stingray shoes

Meh, everyone has their flaws.