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Old 15-11-2014, 19:30
mimi dlc
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Re Iveta's dress in the opening pro dance

Iveta will have the leopard print version of that dress knocked up by Monday.
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Old 16-11-2014, 10:17
mimi dlc
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Discussing the War of the Worlds theme for Pixie's Paso
In fairness, Rome is a more dramatic setting for a paso than Woking. I'm not sure bringing Horsell Common to the dancefloor would have done much for the dramatic tension.
Didn't Martians land all over the world? So sure there must have been some near Rome.
They would never get through the traffic.
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Old 16-11-2014, 11:40
mimi dlc
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Waiting for the spoiler result last night...
Fred v Ginger. Fred out
That Ginger's a dirty ringah.
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Old 16-11-2014, 12:52
mimi dlc
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Poor Trent in that costume too He's lovely but not gladiator material. The lions would have used him for a toothpick.
Aw bless....
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Old 16-11-2014, 21:14
tortoiseperson
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Ewww ...

I wonder if Mark has heard that Steve is studying herpetology and sidled up to him in a quiet moment saying 'Uhhhh, Steve, mate, I've got this, like, really red itch ..... ummmm, down there, you know .....'
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Old 16-11-2014, 21:27
planets
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I'd like to nominate this post about Steve Backshall

He's like the anti-Mark.
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Old 16-11-2014, 22:18
Glanbraint
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From Len's run out of critiques thread

I get the idea that he's just got a random phrase generator under the desk
Yeah. He forgot to enable the parental guidance module on it this week!
Let's hope it doesn't break otherwise we'll get some disturbing mishmash -

"YER CAHM AHHTTT and pickled me walnuts and it's harder for men... *trails off*... rumba... waltz... very hard for men... walnuts... pickled... heel lead... samba... hard for men... *to audience* SHAATT AHHHPP! I'M DOIN' ME JOB! that rumbletango wuz great... need more pampers... sweaty gauchos... walnuts are harder for men..."
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Old 16-11-2014, 23:50
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Nominating Monkseal on the Shirley Bassey thread. I know he has a blog to spread out in and doesn't need name-checking here but he's captured the whole blummin' thing:

Love Shirley. Love how she BOOMED that first "GOLDFINNNNNNNGAH" like it was whale song. She's got the finesse of an oil tanker bless her, but always such fun. Give her to Anton next series.
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Old 17-11-2014, 14:17
Alleycat666
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This, from the thread discussing why Blackpool doesn't have a dance named after it

You are forgetting the Blackpool Bedhop, whereby you travel to the resort to pick up drunk Northern hens and their entourages, and visit varius run down bed and breakfasts.

This often leads to the Blackpool Itch a frantic leg crossing affair with body spasms.
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Old 17-11-2014, 23:34
RoseAnne
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From the Week 9 dances thread. Daziechain's comment made me laugh. I almost wish it was true!

Yes, I'm looking forward to Sunetras Waltz too, with fab choreo by Brendan no doubt. She is an elegant dancer and it will be a good dance for her.
Pity it's going to be to 'Smells Like Teen Spirit'
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Old 19-11-2014, 08:40
Alleycat666
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Two pieces of brilliance from the Not an Appreciation thread discussing Mark's injury and potential showdance:

Oh, I'm sure it will be by Saturday

I expect nothing less than a pack of frozen peas, wheelchair and hospital visit, while Steve peers, Chad like, over a wall of his own painkillers and anti-inflammatories.
Oh me too, there isn't enough vodka in the world to get me through his showdance to a mashup of There's no one quite like Grandma/Cry me a river and Michelle My Belle
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Old 23-11-2014, 16:15
mimi dlc
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Discussing using classical music for Strictly..
I would have them dance to The Ring Cycle - all of it. Anyone who gets to the end of the 19 hours (is it?) is the winner.
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Old 23-11-2014, 20:18
mimi dlc
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On Barry Manilow's face...
he seems to have turned into an elf. possibly dobby's older cousin.
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Old 23-11-2014, 20:43
mimi dlc
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How about a 'themed' week of dancing to appropriate effing music. That'll confuse the producers.
If only...
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Old 23-11-2014, 22:09
thengp12
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About Around the World dances

Dunno about Around the World.
Some of these ideas are Around the Bend
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Old 26-11-2014, 14:32
mimi dlc
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From the Which celebrity dancers were non-dancers before the programme?

MDF (Mark) had to ask Karen to point out the dance floor as he had never seen one before
Yeah, right!
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Old 26-11-2014, 20:01
mimi dlc
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On the subject of Jake's Greek themed Argentine Tango

Two countries who already have it in for us over the Elgin marbles and the Falklands will now have something else to hate us for.
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Old 27-11-2014, 10:10
Kmc1978
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On the idea of a warning system about possible Lisa Riley appearances on ITT...

. I'm in favour of a code phrase or Safe Word to denote an imminent Riley visitation. Might I suggest 'there's Klingons on the starboard bow'?
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Old 27-11-2014, 13:42
Monaogg
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From the ITT thread
Ahahah me too, I didn't want to add that though as I still wanna be down wit da kidz!
Ah, I can still be down wit da kidz - I just can't get up again
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Old 27-11-2014, 18:37
BuddyBontheNet
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Hah! You did beat me to it!
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Old 29-11-2014, 20:16
BuddyBontheNet
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From the live show thread...

Producers, or who ever at BBC that says lets do an Argentine in Greece to Greek music should be looking for a new job.
Could have been worse, they could have dressed them as kebabs
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Old 29-11-2014, 23:18
*Topaz*
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From the 'What songs would you dance to?' thread.

I posted this a few days ago about my fantasy Strictly experience. I think people thought I was joking but this is truly what I would want to dance to -

Week 1 - Waltz
Aljaz - Coles Corner (Richard Hawley)
It's so romantic the national birth rate goes up 50% nine months after my performance. The rehearsals go well except Aljaz keeps stopping to propose to me. It's embarrassing! We've only just met.

Week 2 - Cha Cha Cha
Iveta - La Bamba - (Ritchie Valens)
Gosh, Iveta and I are practically body doubles! We each wear dresses that weigh 50lbs but it doesn't matter because we're fabulous. It's all going well until someone in the canteen asks if he can have a selfie with The Cheeky Girls. Iveta is from Lithuania, she doesn't understand why I'm crying.

Week 3 - Foxtrot
Brendan - The Very Thought of You (Ella Fitzgerald)
Brendan gets his mojo back and we're like Fred and Ginge! Aljaz can't cope with me dancing with another man. There are fisticuffs. The Daily Mail reports of 'backstage tensions' don't even cover half of it.

Week 4 - Jive
Pasha - Dreaming (Blondie)
We're Debbie Harry and Andy Warhol at CBGBs and we're soooo cool! The comedy VT involves Pasha in a Warhol-esque film called The Dance Factory. He's so happy he cries.

Week 5 - Tango
Aliona - This Town Ain't Big Enough for the Both of Us (Sparks)
God, Aliona seems sooooo scary but it turns out she's just really, really method and, in fact, I'm the only person she's ever liked in her life. We become BFF, and by that I mean Mean Girls.

Week 6 - Samba
Ian - Going Back to My Roots (Odyssey)
It's so incredible the viewers feel like they've worn a polyester jumpsuit but been let into Studio 54 anyway. Ian wears those red trousers. He decides he's also my BFF and we're going to do everything together and go everywhere together and never leave each other's side.

Week 7 - Rumba
Vincent - Help Me Make It Through the Night (Rita Coolidge and Kris Kristofferson)
It's so sensual teenagers can't bear to watch with their parents. The Daily Star's front page asks if two Strictly stars 'did it' on live television. We did.

Blackpool Week - American Smooth
Anton - Everything's Coming Up Roses (Ethel Merman)
The entire tower is turned into a giant helter-skelter. Anton and I slide down from the top and land in the ballroom. We do the entire routine while simultaneously keeping 100 plates spinning on poles and never break a single one. It's so camp from henceforth Anton and I are asked to front every single Eurovision Song Contest ever.

Week 9 - Charleston
Aliona - The Charleston (Mack and Johnson)
We're literally possessed by the spirit of Josephine Baker. There is a slight wardrobe malfunction with a black widow infestation in our banana costumes but Aliona just kills them with her bare hands and carries on. Aliona rocks!

Week 10 - Quickstep
Natalie - Lust for Life (Iggy Pop)
Our legs are so long and elegant we're like a pair of Sapphic gazelles leaping across the plains. It's all going well until she keeps stopping to propose to me in rehearsals. Oh god, not the women too!

Quarter Finals - Salsa and Argentine Tango
Flavia (Salsa) - Bamboleo (Celia Cruz)
It's so authentic viewers write to Raul Castro to demand he invades the UK. The US Ambassador leaves the country in protest. Aljaz begins to style himself as Che Guevara in an attempt to impress me. It's kind of hot.
Vincent (Argentine Tango) - Theme from Bullitt (Lalo Schifrin)
Vincent arrives on a Vespa he's ridden from the West End. It's a cool, jazzy interpretation. Viewers tuning in halfway through wonder why primetime Saturday evening BBC1 is showing a Fellini film. Others complain the dry ice means they can't see our footwork. That's not dry ice, it's the smoke our legs are generating.

Semi Finals - Paso Doble and Viennese Waltz
Tristan (Paso Doble) - Prince Charming (Adam and the Ants)
I'm originally partnered with Kristina but we catfight over who gets to be Diana Dors. I'm jealous that she actually looks like her and demand she is replaced by Tristan who is just so rock 'n' roll. When Pasha see Tristan's costume he silently weeps in a corner.
Aljaz (Viennese Waltz) - Mad About the Boy (Dinah Washington)
I'm a mature Joan Crawford, he's a young Montgomery Clift, he steps from a silvery-screen and we dance. As we whirl around the dance-floor he whispers from a folio of poetry he has written about me entitled 'Your Milky-White Thighs'. I wonder about getting the police involved.

The Final - Showdance
Aljaz - Jump (Van Halen)
After reprising my quickstep, rumba and waltz I perform my showdance. The original Van Halen reforms just for this moment and they've used a time machine so they're not all old and wrinkly. I arrive atop a motorcycle pyramid, comprising Austin Healey, Colin Jackson, Ramps, Michael Vaughn and Mark Benton, and leap through a firey hoop. Halfway through the routine we pause as a newly-ordained Ian performs a marriage ceremony for Aljaz and I. It's a move that blasts the classic 'dead nan' out of the water. Unfortunately I have entered Strictly in the same year as Jonny Wilkinson who is good-looking and a bloke and a sportsman and, surprisingly, half-decent at dancing and I am merely runner-up. DS Spy will debate this moment for the next decade.

I think I have thought about this way too much.
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Old 29-11-2014, 23:24
planets
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From the 'What songs would you dance to?' thread.
excellent choice
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Old 30-11-2014, 19:41
mimi dlc
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Discussing the ladies in Andre Rieu's orchestra
To think none of them came to work wearing the same outfit. What are the odds?
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Old 01-12-2014, 00:09
perdiedumpling
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On Pixie:

I do wish someone just would tell her if she got the job at Euro Disney though. I swear she's auditioned for it about 3 times now and I'm getting a little tired of Disney Princess Mode Pixie. It's very pretty but I had a brief moment of fear that they were somehow going to be dancing their waltz to It's a Small, Small World last night, what with the costumes, the hair, the clogs, the windmill, the basket of tulips and the kitchen sink. I far preferred Futuristic Gladiator Warrior Pixie, Electric Hair Pixie, 1940s Housewife Pixie and maybe even Carmen Miranda Pixie to Disney Princess Pixie. (Auditioning For The Role of Roxie Hart Pixie was vaguely terrifying, still not sure if I liked that one or not.)
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