Good morning, here we at Stamford Bridge football stadium. Bridge is also a card game like Poker and Go Fish so this week your task is design a new range of fishing equipment.

"Good morning. You may be wondering why we're standing on the planet Mars. Well Mars is a planet in outer space but it's also the name of a chocolate bar. And that's your task this week - making a new flavour of chocolate bar.
The team that wins will be the one that makes the most profit and in the losing team at least one of you will be fired."

"Good morning. You may be wondering why you're standing on top of an active volcano. Well volcanoes are very hot places - and another place that can be hot is the kitchen. So that's your task this week - creating a new kitchen product".

"You may be wondering why we're standing in the Emirates Stadium. I bloody well am. Well loads of players have played here - including Thierry Henry. His surname would be said like Henry if he was english - and Horrid Henry is a very popular children's book. So that's what you're doing this week - creating a new children's book. Whoever makes the most sales win".


Brilliant. Brilliant. That's all I have to say.

"Hello, you might we wondering why I summoned you to popular clothing retailer River Island. An Island was the location of popular TV series "Lost", a big hit for the network ABC. Those are the first three letters of the alphabet, which was the inspiration for Alphabetti Spaghetti. Yes, today you'll be producing and selling your own brand of tinned food!"

Welcome to London Dungeon. Millions of tourists pass through here every year and get a chill down there spine. Refrigerators containing meat are also chilled. Today you will be producing and selling barbecued meat at street markets in London.

"You may be wondering why you're in the boardroom. Well it's called the boardroom - and quite frankly I'm bored of doing the Apprentice and putting up with you morons. I'm quitting. So your task this week is to find someone to replace me. The winner is the team who comes up with the idea that pleases a selection of viewers the most. Anyway I won't be here so I don't care what you produce."

I remember in the 'rebrand Margate' episode of Series 5, Monkseal said on his blog that the teams have to rebrand Margaret, as she's become a little tired and needs to become cool again. Ironically, in the next series she was replaced by Karren!

Keep em coming folks, my favourite thread on here.

Well, here we are at the lion house at London Zoo. The lions inspired the name Lionel. Lionel Jeffries directed The Railway Children. This week, you'll be selling a selection of items at London tube stations.

Or, alternatively:

Lionel Bart wrote the musical Oliver! For this task, you're going to be starting catering services and selling them to children's homes. And it must be more nutritious than gruel. The first team to get requests for seconds wins.

I've probably forgotten, but have we had Lord Alan's early morning trip to the house?

I haven't read any of Monkseal's series 5 recaps, thanks for reminding me to getting round to it!

"Here we are in a Fish mongers, cod is a type of fish and cod is the abbreviation of the video game Call Of Duty, talking of games, Chess is a type of board game which involves Kings and Queens. Dancing Queen is a popular song by ABBA, the ABBA singers have liver. Talking of liver that reminds me of cod liver oil. Cod liver oil is liver is from a cod fish. Today you will be selling fish. Good luck".

Not that I can think of...


Ha! That made me laugh.

I was so chuffed with myself when I quoted what Sugar would say almost word for word before they got on the ship.....agree it was ridiculously contrived but way the programme is edited now what can we expect....the most contrived prog on modern tv I'd say.

Clever and funny!

Here we are at the House of Lords. I'm a Lord. Lord Sugar. I'm more sour than sweet. Today your task is to run a Chinese restaurant. The team with the most wontons sold will win.

For the next task: " Welcome to my house. On my left you see my cleaner Oscar. The Oscar is an American film prize. For this week's task I want you to go to America and shoot an ad campaign for soft drinks"

Good morning, welcome to the UK headquarters of Kelloggs. Kelloggs are the leading supplier of UK breakfast cereals. Your task is to teach basket weaving to serial killers. James, I especially want you to get involved with this task.

Well, this week they actually had a relevant briefing location.

I know, it was a killjoy.

I was actually kinda disappointed.

Undoubtedly Daniel would be keen to be the star of the film to show Lord Sugar that he isn't just a good salesman. (and would avoid a firing when he cocks up)


This is a photoshop job waiting to happen.

That was such a disappointment. I wanted the passports to be a red herring and for him to say 'Good morning. Today we are at the American Embassy. To get to American you have to cross the water, which is exactly what you'll be doing today. You're going to the Isle of Wight.'

"Well here we are at the Apple Store. As you know, Apple are one of the biggest known technology companies. (Solomon lights up at this point) Your task this week is to go to the Big Apple and flog soft drinks"

Soft drinks... specifically apple juice!