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The No Hollyoaks Saturday Thread: The Wonky Weekly Round Up


View Poll Results: If you could choose ONE character to throw in the pond, never to return again?
Tony 'The Hutch' Hutchinson 2 4.00%
Cindy ' Drama' Cunningham 0 0%
'King' Jack Osborne 0 0%
Darren 'Dazzle' Osborne 0 0%
'Giant' Holly Cunningham 0 0%
Tom 'Grim Reaper' Cunningham 0 0%
Frankie 'Hankie-Pankie' Osborne 0 0%
Nancy 'Short-Arse' Osborne 2 4.00%
Ste 'Woe is me' Hay 1 2.00%
Mercedes 'Drives me round the Benz' McQueen 0 0%
Myra 'The cake isn't a lie' McQueen 0 0%
John-Paul 'Sorry Ste' McQueen 1 2.00%
Marlena 'Nana' 'Motability' McQueen 0 0%
'Is Harry on the boat?' Thompson 0 0%
Sinead ' Banshee' O'Connor 1 2.00%
Diane 'Moan Moan' O'Connor 6 12.00%
Esther Bloom(ing) 0 0%
Dirk 'Gentle Giant' Savage 0 0%
Phoebe 'Not Feeble' McQueen 0 0%
Maxine 'Things can only get better' Minniver 0 0%
Sienna 'Fruit Loops' Blake 0 0%
Patrick 'Ratprick' Blake 0 0%
Robbie 'Better than the other twin' Roscoe 0 0%
Freddie ' ' Roscoe 20 40.00%
Joe 'Boring' Roscoe 0 0%
Ziggy 'Arse-dust' Roscoe 0 0%
Lindsey 'Poor Lynsey replacement' Butterfield 1 2.00%
Peri 'Nandos' Lomax 2 4.00%
Tegan 'Teabag' Lomax 1 2.00%
Leela 'Never at work' Lomax 0 0%
Grace Black (Sheep) 1 2.00%
Nico 'Please no speako' Blake 0 0%
Cameron 'Killer' Campbell 4 8.00%
Kim 'Instant Psycho' Butterfield 0 0%
Dr. Charles 'Snugglepuss' S'Avage 1 2.00%
Lockie 'If they're breathing, I'll have a crack at it' Campbell 1 2.00%
Porsche 'No Turbo' McQueen 2 4.00%
'Wonderful' Celine McQueen 1 2.00%
Dylan 'Dude looks like a lady' Jenkins 0 0%
Cleo 'Renault' McQueen 0 0%
Simone 'Price-Slice dictator' Loveday 1 2.00%
Zack 'Please don't come back' Loveday 2 4.00%
Louis 'Who' Loveday 0 0%
Reenie 'Yet another' McQueen 0 0%
Voters: 50. You can't vote on this poll right now - are you signed in?

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Old 18-04-2015, 15:45
DJ Jimmy
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Happy Saturday Oaksters and fellow nutters

No Hollyoaks today so I thought I'd set up a thread that can tide us up until Monday with a few bits and pieces.

It wasn't a particularly amazing week with the rubbish school ball thingy, Darren's beer mat nonsense, and worst of all, Cameron getting a piece of Celine

However it wasn't all bad, with the introduction of Reenie, some good innuendo from Tony, and best of all, Cameron bizarrely getting knocked out

But that was last week, so what's coming up?

More Kim and Joe drama

Sarah George wants Kim to be the gloved hand killer (Warning Chewy, if you click on this one, it's near impossible to close the page )

Twinnie-Lee Moore: 'Porsche abuse story is an honour'

Torchwood star to play Hollyoaks child abuser

Other Bits 'N' Pieces

The Story of Darren's Dating Disasters

On This Day...

Justin is traumatised by events (2007)

Poll up soon

Also, I was thinking of doing a predictions thingy similar to the Coronation Street threads, anyone interested?

Enjoy!
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Old 18-04-2015, 15:53
srhgts
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Fantastic thread idea Wonky-Winky, I love it! I guess it's the logical alternative to keeping the ep thread going all weekend.

It really has been a shit week. I did chuckle at Sienna and Theresa fighting over conditioner, though, and of course Porsche's scene about the abuse was stunning.
Lomax/Roscoe and Cindy/Darren/Jason stuff was all ****ing awful.
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Old 18-04-2015, 16:11
DJ Jimmy
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Fantastic thread idea Wonky-Winky, I love it! I guess it's the logical alternative to keeping the ep thread going all weekend.

It really has been a shit week. I did chuckle at Sienna and Theresa fighting over conditioner, though, and of course Porsche's scene about the abuse was stunning.
Lomax/Roscoe and Cindy/Darren/Jason stuff was all ****ing awful.
Thanks

I haven't seen Monday's yet but Sienna and Theresa fighting does sound good
you are right though, not a great week. Porsche's scene about the abuse was the best bit. It was really well done.
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Old 18-04-2015, 16:27
lulu g
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I was unable to vote in the poll, owing to the absence of Theresa 'Blow-Up Doll' McQueen from the list.
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Old 18-04-2015, 16:29
DJ Jimmy
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I was unable to vote in the poll, wing to the absence of Theresa 'Blow-Up Doll' McQueen.
Sorry Lulu, I knew I'd miss someone out, and I can't edit the poll

I just realised I missed out Jason 'Non-Robbie' Roscoe.

Must try harder...
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Old 18-04-2015, 16:34
srhgts
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It's not an actual catfight or anything, Theresa's trying to be mates really, but Sienna's hilarious in her revulsion. Sienna really is great sometimes, it's a shame they do so much of the moustache-twirling eyebrow-plotting abduction rubbish with her. I think the best scene she's ever had was that "I was head girl " bit in the club with Maxine and Mercedes. Something actually character driven for once.
Porsche is just great generally. I can't believe the contrast between the character I was expecting and how she actually is. To be fair though, surely no one was expecting much from current Oaks. All recent additions I can think of apart from the McQueen sisters have been pretty awful.
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Old 18-04-2015, 16:35
winter99
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I love that Cindy's settled with Dirk and she's developed as a character I do miss bitchy Cindy. We're probably going to have to accept a Jason/Cindy affair which I don't think will be horrid as it's better than Jason & Holly.
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Old 18-04-2015, 16:36
Chaseta
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Only one? That is a hard choice Wonky-Winky! Well in that case, can go in the pond, cameron and lockie can go on a road trip that ends up falling of a cliff (sorry Madness i know you like Cam), and Lindsey can decide shes actually in love with Grace so Kim gets jealous and bumps her off!
Love the thread idea! A weekly roundup for the weekend fix
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Old 18-04-2015, 16:41
cfc86
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What a great idea Wonky-Winky

Ah the beautiful Sarah George *swoon* She has really stunning eyes. She looked particularly beautiful in Tuesdays episode. Just a shame it was for Cameron/Celine crap

This week was a very dire week. The only highlights were Cameron and Lockie both getting knocked out though pity Lockie wasn't knocked as bad as Cameron, Tony being Tony and Porsche. Twinnie Lee Moore was exceptional this week and her scenes with Phoebe were beautifully done. I also enjoyed her scenes with Reenie too.

As for the poll. It's so unfair we only have one option There's so many I could pick but ultimately it has to be Freddie.
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Old 18-04-2015, 16:47
DJ Jimmy
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I'm liking it that the poll is unfair
That's why I made it one character only! Remember, it's only a small pond!

You are right Chewy, even putting up with
Cameron ruining everything wasn't enough to distract from Celine's beauty

I'm liking your ideas Chaseta, good ideas to get rid of those morons
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Old 18-04-2015, 16:51
winter99
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This seems like quite a good thread to plug something.
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Old 18-04-2015, 16:52
winter99
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That's why I made it one character only! Remember, it's only a small pond!
It seemed to expand when the Savages brought a houseboat.
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Old 18-04-2015, 17:19
DJ Jimmy
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It seemed to expand when the Savages brought a houseboat.
You're not meant to remember that

Has it ever been mentioned since the fire?
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Old 18-04-2015, 18:25
cfc86
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I'm liking it that the poll is unfair
That's why I made it one character only! Remember, it's only a small pond!

You are right Chewy, even putting up with
Cameron ruining everything wasn't enough to distract from Celine's beauty

I'm liking your ideas Chaseta, good ideas to get rid of those morons
I'd bury the rest elsewhere then Their is just too many too list.

I just ignored that arse and focused on Celine. She is the thing of beauty that is beautiful
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Old 18-04-2015, 18:34
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I love this idea!

It's pretty unusual to say with the usual fast pace of Hollyoaks, but this week has been unbearably dull.
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Old 18-04-2015, 19:09
srhgts
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In the absence of the execrable Jason as an option, and safe in the knowledge that surely loads of folk will vote for and Lindsey, I went for Nandos. "I hate yer!"
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Old 18-04-2015, 19:28
cfc86
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In the absence of the execrable Jason as an option, and safe in the knowledge that surely loads of folk will vote for and Lindsey, I went for Nandos. "I hate yer!"
That's exactly what she'll say to you
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Old 18-04-2015, 19:31
Chaseta
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Umm I musnt have been paying full attention somewhere along the line but I thought Dirk and Cindy were also getting married because Cindy had booked Leelas cancelled slot? Did they decide not to go ahead or did i just mishear?
And where was Joe when all the Roscoes were getting ready for Ziggys wedding?
This week was obviously so interesting that I've been paying THAT close attention to it
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Old 18-04-2015, 19:34
srhgts
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That's exactly what she'll say to you
It's what she says to everyone! To be fair I wouldn't want such an odious child to like me.
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Old 18-04-2015, 19:38
srhgts
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Umm I musnt have been paying full attention somewhere along the line but I thought Dirk and Cindy were also getting married because Cindy had booked Leelas cancelled slot? Did they decide not to go ahead or did i just mishear?
And where was Joe when all the Roscoes were getting ready for Ziggys wedding?
This week was obviously so interesting that I've been paying THAT close attention to it
It wasn't really made very clear at all but Dirk indicated he didn't want to marry her while she was supposedly having a bipolar episode. What a lovely message for Oaks to put across.

Joe was just not there with no explanation. I mean it's only his brother's wedding, why on earth should he bother to go? Ditto anyone Leela knows other than Peri and Tegan failing to go to her "hen night." She's a 20 something with a job (that she never goes to but whatevs) and she can't produce a single friend to have at it? Wtf? What happened to her and Sienna being bezzies not so long ago. Sienna didn't even know Leela was getting married.
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Old 18-04-2015, 20:29
cfc86
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Umm I musnt have been paying full attention somewhere along the line but I thought Dirk and Cindy were also getting married because Cindy had booked Leelas cancelled slot? Did they decide not to go ahead or did i just mishear?
And where was Joe when all the Roscoes were getting ready for Ziggys wedding?
This week was obviously so interesting that I've been paying THAT close attention to it
I forgot about the Dirk/Cindy stuff too so I'm glad Daffy remembered. I tend to zone out a lot when Oaks is on unless it's Celine

Joe I found laughable wasn't at the wedding yet he'll turn up to his ex wife and brother getting married. On that note did Joe and Lindsey ever get married? And if so I'm pretty sure they aren't divorced.

It's what she says to everyone! To be fair I wouldn't want such an odious child to like me.
I wouldn't want her liking me either

To be fair I wouldn't want any of the Lomax lot to like me.
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Old 18-04-2015, 20:57
srhgts
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I forgot about the Dirk/Cindy stuff too so I'm glad Daffy remembered. I tend to zone out a lot when Oaks is on unless it's Celine

Joe I found laughable wasn't at the wedding yet he'll turn up to his ex wife and brother getting married. On that note did Joe and Lindsey ever get married? And if so I'm pretty sure they aren't divorced.



I wouldn't want her liking me either

To be fair I wouldn't want any of the Lomax lot to like me.
Joe and Lindsey never got married. I can't remember how many failed attempts they had, I tend to get them muddled up with Tony and Diane who had something ridiculous like 4 attempts before the successful sham wedding. Surely anyone else by that point would have got the message that it wasn't meant to be.
As a person struggling to afford to have one wedding and waiting several years for it it does annoy me to see the silliness in soaps about them. Oh nevermind that one's gone wrong, you can just rebook it for a week later or something. It's ludicrous. The amount of time, money, effort, sanity that goes into planning a wedding, it's hardly rearranging a trip to the cinema. I mean I don't exactly expect realism from Oaks (surely no one does?) but it's galling how there are so many weddings that get scrapped and rearranged like it's nothing. They seem to be organised in about half an hour, usually on a whim, of course with no mention of the declaration of intent to marry beforehand or anything like that.
Then there's that other soap staple; the marriage in order to con someone out of money. Also galling since I desperately want to do it for the right reasons. Aaaargh, it all just really gets on my nerves.
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Old 18-04-2015, 20:58
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Why is there so many votes for MyCameron
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Old 18-04-2015, 21:18
Chaseta
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It wasn't really made very clear at all but Dirk indicated he didn't want to marry her while she was supposedly having a bipolar episode. What a lovely message for Oaks to put across.

Joe was just not there with no explanation. I mean it's only his brother's wedding, why on earth should he bother to go? Ditto anyone Leela knows other than Peri and Tegan failing to go to her "hen night." She's a 20 something with a job (that she never goes to but whatevs) and she can't produce a single friend to have at it? Wtf? What happened to her and Sienna being bezzies not so long ago. Sienna didn't even know Leela was getting married.
Thank you, most kind
That seems weird for Dirk to say that, Cindy has always been quite impulsive anyway. I get that he would want her to be thinking clearly and not just rushing ahead on all cylinders but he could have just said the truth- that 2 days is no time at all to plan a wedding!
They even had cut out Robbie so I was sure Id missed an explanation for Joes absence. Yea Leela is supposed to have been a bit of a wild independent social girl when she first came in but I suppose like any soap- once your in the village you must never have any connections to your past or step foot outside the village!
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Old 18-04-2015, 21:27
Chaseta
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I forgot about the Dirk/Cindy stuff too so I'm glad Daffy remembered. I tend to zone out a lot when Oaks is on unless it's Celine

Joe I found laughable wasn't at the wedding yet he'll turn up to his ex wife and brother getting married. On that note did Joe and Lindsey ever get married? And if so I'm pretty sure they aren't divorced.



I wouldn't want her liking me either

To be fair I wouldn't want any of the Lomax lot to like me.
Celine is fab, I hope they keep her away from Cameron. In fact all the fellas in oaks, none of them are right for her!
I suppose Joe just forgot Ziggy was his brother
Pfft Peri doesnt like anybody! Well unless they are leaving like she told them to, then its all "noo you cant go. How can you do this to me? I need ya"
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