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Ben must be desperate for sex


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Old 30-04-2015, 11:37
radyag
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Its just so unrealistic that a young horny gay guy would be sex free for so long. And also why haven't we heard anything about his time in prison? Did he meet a lad and get some shags in their? After all these things happen with like minded guys in prison.

I hate the way soap show gays as being non-sexual, its just so unreal, meanwhile the straights are busy having affairs all over the place. When I was a young gay man I had plenty, its such a waste.
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Old 30-04-2015, 11:47
stud u like
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I am surprised his character hasn't used the saunas, gym changing rooms, public toilets, trolling grounds and dark rooms by now.
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Old 30-04-2015, 11:54
bass55
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We've already seen him messaging a guy through Grindr or something similar, so presumably he has been meeting up with someone for sex.
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Old 30-04-2015, 11:55
joe gillott
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Its just so unrealistic that a young horny gay guy would be sex free for so long. And also why haven't we heard anything about his time in prison? Did he meet a lad and get some shags in their? After all these things happen with like minded guys in prison.

I hate the way soap show gays as being non-sexual, its just so unreal, meanwhile the straights are busy having affairs all over the place. When I was a young gay man I had plenty, its such a waste.
I'm bens age and still am. Not something I feel the need to rush into.
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Old 30-04-2015, 11:59
shrinkingviolet
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I can't tell if this thread is a wind-up or not so if it is I'm going to look like an idiot for responding to it as if you're serious, but I'll live with it.

Not everyone has the same sex drive, & sexuality doesn't have anything to do with it. Jay's straight and we haven't seen him overly eager to sleep around either so he's not having affairs all over the place.

Ben obviously isn't settling for Abbie - he's made a pass at both Johnny & Jay since he's been back & looking at guys online, so I think it's pretty clear he's not opposed to looking elsewhere.

As for showing gay guys as non-sexual - Christian was quite active before he settled down with Sayid, so I don't really think your criticism is overly fair or accurate.
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Old 30-04-2015, 12:01
MrJames
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I don't know how 'unrealistic' it is.
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Old 30-04-2015, 12:14
Bitoftreakle
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Are they going to follow up the whole Grindr thing? Would be funny if the guy he was messaging turned up on the square for like an episode and Abi found out. I still reckon Paul Coker is coming in as a love interest who is very 'comfortable with himself'.
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Old 30-04-2015, 12:18
joe gillott
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Johnny never went overly crazy to find someone either. He also wasn't fussed about the dating site idea when Nancy and Whitney put him up.
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Old 30-04-2015, 12:23
bass55
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Johnny never went overly crazy to find someone either. He also wasn't fussed about the dating site idea when Nancy and Whitney put him up.
Yes, in fact I would challenge the OP's claim that young gay men are all desperate for sex (and the implication that if they aren't there's something wrong with them). I would suggest most of them probably aren't that fussed.
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Old 30-04-2015, 12:34
radyag
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Yes, in fact I would challenge the OP's claim that young gay men are all desperate for sex (and the implication that if they aren't there's something wrong with them). I would suggest most of them probably aren't that fussed.
Trust me, all teen boys are, and if not, then their is something wrong, it's natural to be a horny teen.
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Old 30-04-2015, 12:43
bass55
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Trust me, all teen boys are, and if not, then their is something wrong, it's natural to be a horny teen.
I was a teenage boy not too long ago and I certainly wasn't like that, and neither were most others I knew. You are making a sweeping generalisation.
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Old 30-04-2015, 12:50
GeekInfected
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Just because we don't see the characters sleeping or going to the toilet - doesn't mean they don't. So I think we can safely assume that Prince Benneth the Confused Crusadr is getting up to all sorts of bumfun in his spare time. Just like we can safely assume Dot Cotton is Queen B in prison.
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Old 30-04-2015, 12:53
Carly_Thompson
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Trust me, all teen boys are, and if not, then their is something wrong, it's natural to be a horny teen.
I have a few gay friends and they're not into casual sex or hook-ups, and dating isn't a massive priority for them either. You're being incredibly small minded.
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Old 30-04-2015, 13:01
craig_25
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Ben and Johnny are both good representations of young gay men who are not comfortable with their sexuality, which prevents them from forging any kind of relationship with other men.

I knew I was gay when I was about 13 but I didn't have any kind of sexual contact with a man until I was 26!!! Being a 'horny teenager' doesn't factor into it when you're full of self loathing, and hate that being gay is a part of who you are. Even thinking about sex fills you with guilt and fear.

The idea that all young gay men just accept they are gay, get on Grindr and shag about is pretty unrealistic.
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Old 30-04-2015, 13:25
little-monster
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Sometimes people come out once they are in a relationship, otherwise you are essentially giving yourself a label.
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Old 30-04-2015, 15:02
broadshoulder
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Trust me, all teen boys are, and if not, then their is something wrong, it's natural to be a horny teen.
I agree. He'd be gagging for it. He must have tried sauna's and the like...
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Old 30-04-2015, 15:04
broadshoulder
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I have a few gay friends and they're not into casual sex or hook-ups, and dating isn't a massive priority for them either. You're being incredibly small minded.
'Having gay friends' isn't the same as being gay. How would you know? Seriously, how would you know?
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Old 30-04-2015, 15:10
Hankshaw
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'Having gay friends' isn't the same as being gay. How would you know? Seriously, how would you know?
Are you suggesting her friends are hiding their secret lovers from her?
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Old 30-04-2015, 15:11
craig_25
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I agree. He'd be gagging for it. He must have tried sauna's and the like...
He really wouldn't! (Where's the vom emoji when you need it?!?)

That's like saying straight teenage boys who can't get a shag, must just end up visiting a brothel!

I am a young gay man, who has never been inclined to visit a sauna, and know of no one in my straight friends, that have been desperate enough to go to a prostitute!
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Old 30-04-2015, 15:11
firefly_irl
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I have a few gay friends and they're not into casual sex or hook-ups, and dating isn't a massive priority for them either. You're being incredibly small minded.
As a gay guy I can cosign on this, not everyone is having sex week in week out, this hyper sexualised stereotype of gay guys is inaccurate, sure some are but so are some straight people just like how straight people have long dry spells too.
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Old 30-04-2015, 15:16
broadshoulder
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He really wouldn't! (Where's the vom emoji when you need it?!?)

That's like saying straight teenage boys who can't get a shag, must just end up visiting a brothel!

I am a young gay man, who has never been inclined to visit a sauna, and know of no one in my straight friends, that have been desperate enough to go to a prostitute!
The Eastend is full of queer places ie The White Swan, Hoxton, Shoreditch etc surely he would know of such places?
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Old 30-04-2015, 15:17
broadshoulder
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As a gay guy I can cosign on this, not everyone is having sex week in week out, this hyper sexualised stereotype of gay guys is inaccurate, sure some are but so are some straight people just like how straight people have long dry spells too.
Alot do. But others explode. They catch up on the sex they missed out on in the teenage years.
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Old 30-04-2015, 15:19
Ozboz3
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Well we've seen that he's a member of Grindr so who's to say that he hasn't met some gay guys for a one night stand? I don't agree with the stereotype however that all teenage boys are only sex driven regardless of being straight or gay....
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Old 30-04-2015, 15:26
eejm
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Has it ever been addressed whether or not Ben and Abi are having sex? I'd presume they are as they live together. I know Ben is into men so it may not be quite as satisfying, but it would be an outlet of sorts for him.

For whatever it's worth, a close guy friend of mine who is gay has said that he's never been one for casual hook ups, and that he's always been relationship-minded (he and his husband started dating in their mid-twenties and have been together for about 15 years). I think the desire for casual sex with multiple partners or sex with a more serious partner boils down to personality rather than sexual orientation.
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Old 30-04-2015, 15:46
ChatterFace
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Its just so unrealistic that a young horny gay guy would be sex free for so long. And also why haven't we heard anything about his time in prison? Did he meet a lad and get some shags in their? After all these things happen with like minded guys in prison.

I hate the way soap show gays as being non-sexual, its just so unreal, meanwhile the straights are busy having affairs all over the place. When I was a young gay man I had plenty, its such a waste.
Not everyone is the same, I know straight people who are single and don't go sleeping around just because they want sex. I also know gay people who are single and have been for a long time. I have been single for over 2 years now and most certainly will not be looking for sex. I'm sure soon enough Ben will find a partner but we don't all have the sex drive of Max Branning you know
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