Klass Of Nuke Em High. mylene gets the bomb and becomes world's 10th nuclear power ............

The Dish. the wimbledon ladies' singles trophy is stolen, and eventually turns up in a balti restaurant in southall .........

Amerika. dokumentary film abowt france kafka's dysleksia .........

Mackenna's Gold - Hypnotist Paul abuses his powers and steals ladies' jewellery when they're under his spell.

Steamboat Willy. originally, walt disney gave micky mouse a huge penis. but the Hayes production code was imposed, so micky got trousers, and huge ears instead.

...... hang on, do mice have tails ?

The Pink Panther Strikes Again. but that's ok, he's french. makes a change from dock workers or air traffic controllers ........

The Birds'. cliff richard takes 3 women out dancing one night. Kinda hard to believe, even back then. Even when he buys one of them an alcoholic drink. Cliff, put that leather jacket back on, it's way past your bedtime ........

The Birds. hitchcock's shocker about the invention of custard powder made audiences go white, somtimes even a bit yelllow ......

The young ones.... a film that a celebrity from the 60/70 doesn't want you to see.

I do recall Jonathon Ross when he did the BBC film programme ranting on about "The Mothman Prohecies",
...mainly as he wanted to see "a man in a giant moth costume".

Mr Turner. biopic of Michael Gambon, who collects lathes.

Nightmare on elm street....

Elm street is one of the most affluent middle class streets in town. One day a lottery winning chav moves in with his oily-looking pitbulls....

Paper Moon. conspiracy theorists break into area 51, and discover the film studios where the moon landings were faked, along with all david attenborough's wildlife documentaries ..........

Pig Hunt - Members of a political party try to find the ideal birthday present for there prime minister.
Dave - Only Fools and horses spin off starring Nicolas Lyndhurst.
TrollHunter - A teenager decides to hunt down and kill people who start arguments online.
The Karate kid - Kung-fu Panda spin off movie about a baby goat.
Kramer vs Kramer - Seinfeld's neighbour moves in with his dad.
Point break - Tennis movie.
V for vendetta - Reading and writing lessons for baby psychopaths.
Philadelphia - Two female friends and there daily discussions about there packed lunch in an office environment 'luvleee'.
My Blue heaven - Some porn fiends discuss and choose there favourite scenes.
Wrong turn - A mans sat-nav comes alive and tries to kill him starring stephen fry.

M. biopic of james bond's boss.

The African Queen. biopic of cleopatra.

Kiss Me Kate. william windsor meets kate middleton ......... i won't say "fairy tail romance", in order not to attract david icke's attention ..........

Ivanhoe. story of a landscape gardener, who's also a bit of a pedant ....

The Glen Miller Story. "i got fed up of playing the same 20 tunes, every day, every nighf, so changed my name to john cage".

The Man Who Shot Liberty Valance - tense thriller about a gunman who goes into a department store on Regent Street and begins gunning down all the sheets with deep pleats or gathered borders that are designed to hang down over the mattresses.

Enigma. elgar decoded. the secret of his musical mustache revealed.

Ryan's Daughter. biopic of tatum o'neal.

Turner & Hooch - sad tale of England's favourite painter who descends into home made alcoholism.

Tucker: The Man and His Dream - big screen follow up to the most famous character from Grange Hill, before he moved to Walford and Sun Hill.

The Colour Purple. biopic of wiilliam perkins.