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Old 28-05-2016, 01:22
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Oliver Twist ........educational video, in which tv chef jamie oliver shows how to make a perfect pretzel.
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Old 28-05-2016, 05:09
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Scott Of The Ant Arctic ........ '' we need more power, scottie, more power to transport out of here ......'' ''....... och aye, but capt'in, the poor sleekit six legged beasties are pulling as hard as they can, and are freezin', can we nae give them a wee bit more porridge?'' .......
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Old 29-05-2016, 00:16
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Deaf In Venice ..........hey, mr gondolier ...... yes sir, i mean you in the stripey shirt with a big pole ....... can't you hear the speedboat behind you, catching up quickly? ......... CRUNCH .........
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Old 29-05-2016, 21:29
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Trainspotting....bunch of middle aged men stand on a train platform and spot trains!
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Old 29-05-2016, 22:56
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Fire Maidens From Outer Space - A group of former women astronauts go into the flame
extinguishing business.

Norm of the North - "Cheers" spinoff with George Wendt's character moving from Boston to Vancouver.
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Old 30-05-2016, 00:32
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My Left Foot - a wife reminiscences on the life of her husband, the Labour party leader from 1980 to 1983
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Old 30-05-2016, 01:50
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Twelfth Knight ....... film version of shakespeare's recently discovered play about king arthur.
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Old 30-05-2016, 01:54
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Ram Bow ........ sheep suddenly learn how to make crude projectile weapons. fried chicken becomes much more popular .......
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Old 30-05-2016, 01:59
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Son Of Ram Bow ........ nobody ever thought that sheep would develop nuclear weapons .......
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Old 30-05-2016, 02:05
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Hello Dolly. a genetically engineered sheep develops faster than light space travel. Those sheep who want to, leave planet earth to start a new life elsewhere. Things return to normal. But stephen hawking predicts that one day, robot sheep will take over ........
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Old 30-05-2016, 12:32
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MISTAKE OOPS SORRY. ''hello dolly'' is a song, from either Funny Girl, or Funny Lady. it was 4am, brain in shutdown mode .......,,
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Old 30-05-2016, 23:51
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A Knight To Remember ......... "well, they all wear those skirt things. That's just the standard costume, it allows them to get on their horses quickly. but what did you think about his flowery hat ? too many daffodils, maybe ...... "
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Old 01-06-2016, 05:27
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How To Murder Your Y-Fronts ........ having both reached middle age, and aquiring a lazy lifestyle related middle age spread, both jack lemmon and terry thomas start having weird problems with their underwear not fitting properly. Underpants round ankles at the most awkward moments. Perhaps they should consider boxers, or even g strings, or just keep the darn things up with belt and braces ? or just do without underwear altogether and thrill the ladies ......
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Old 01-06-2016, 23:34
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Silver ...... what makes the lone ranger such a potent force for good ? well, underneath every cowboy, there is a horse .........
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Old 02-06-2016, 23:13
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Thunder Rock ..... a pop group kidnaps a mad scientist, to work on a new type of amplifier, where you can turn the volume all the way up to ..... not just 10 ....... not just 11, but (best to sit down before reading further) ....... A FULL TWELVE. YES THAT'S RIGHT, T-W-E-L-V-E. YES, YOU DID READ THAT CORRECTLY .......
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Old 02-06-2016, 23:27
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The Lady Vanishes. sequel to My Fair Lady. after 3 months with eliza dolittle, professer higgins is thoroughly henpecked, and fed up. So he uses hypnotism to change her back to as he found her, and dumps her back in covent garden ........
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Old 03-06-2016, 00:41
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Operation Dumbo Drop - a plan to parachute circus elephants back into the wild goes horribly wrong when one elephant flies off.
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Old 03-06-2016, 07:02
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Heaven's Gait ........hey, it's the archangel gabriel, and he has a divine way of walking, the exact opposite of a silly walk .........
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Old 03-06-2016, 23:08
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Twenty Thousand Leagues Under The Sea, ....... as global warming continues, and sea levels slowly rise, usa style baseball (schoolgirls' ''rounders'', to us brits) gradually becomes a more underwater sport ........
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Old 03-06-2016, 23:15
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The Danish girl.

The story of a little fat girl, who can't stop eating pastries..... She's just sad she wasn't born with a cock.
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Old 03-06-2016, 23:28
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Universal Soldier - major film studio exec gets fed up making films that lose money, so employs a mercenary to take out the heads of all the other major film companies.
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Old 04-06-2016, 00:22
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Cry baby....

The Paul gascoin story.
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Old 04-06-2016, 00:25
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A funny thing happened on the way to the forum.

A grammar Nazi get the bus from work in order to log on to the digital spy forums. But he gets raped by a clown instead....
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Old 07-06-2016, 05:12
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Knight Mail ........ delivered on horseback. Includes some letters for ''lance''. No chain mail letters allowed ........
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Old 07-06-2016, 08:16
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Pay Per Moon ...... for a small fee, outraged council tax payers can expose their buttocks to the local lord mayor, to show exactly what they think ........
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