"I'll see myself out"
Do people say this in real life?
Do people say this in real life?
The Soaps Most Annoying Cliches
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The horribly unfair miscarriage of justice where everyone instantly turns on the innocent party and no one can see through the guilty one.
Someone's been completely shunned for doing something awful, then something bad happens to them and everyone instantly forgets what they did.
"I'm going to miss (departing character) so much, don't know what I'll do without you"
*Never mentions them again*
The "hug someone just after lying to them and look guilty over their shoulder."
Every wedding reception being in the local grotty pub. Especially when there's been relatively (for a soap) loads of wedding organisation and everything else is very carefully chosen, a fuss is made about what a big, expensive do it is... then they just don't bother to have a proper venue.
Weddings also take five seconds to organise and can be rearranged at a moment's notice. Laughable.
Someone gets diagnosed with a perfectly common, well known illness and a friend/family member has never heard of it. Most recently Maxine in Hollyoaks asked "what's Motor Neurone Disease?" Erm… what the actual ****?
Someone's been completely shunned for doing something awful, then something bad happens to them and everyone instantly forgets what they did.
"I'm going to miss (departing character) so much, don't know what I'll do without you"
*Never mentions them again*
The "hug someone just after lying to them and look guilty over their shoulder."
Every wedding reception being in the local grotty pub. Especially when there's been relatively (for a soap) loads of wedding organisation and everything else is very carefully chosen, a fuss is made about what a big, expensive do it is... then they just don't bother to have a proper venue.
Weddings also take five seconds to organise and can be rearranged at a moment's notice. Laughable.
Someone gets diagnosed with a perfectly common, well known illness and a friend/family member has never heard of it. Most recently Maxine in Hollyoaks asked "what's Motor Neurone Disease?" Erm… what the actual ****?
everything to do with relationships in soaps is clichéd;
"It just happened" - someone I'd never even given a second glance to before just 'fell into my bed' and we couldn't stop it happening ..again and again ..even though we're both really down-to-earth, cynical , unemotional types ( see Debbie and Ross, ED )
Nobody can just get fed up with a relationship and quietly move on ( which is what happens in real life 9 times out of 10 ) A break up always has to be a big drama, with one or both parties getting ridiculously upset / angry about it, even if it was a pretty brief fling.
"It just happened" - someone I'd never even given a second glance to before just 'fell into my bed' and we couldn't stop it happening ..again and again ..even though we're both really down-to-earth, cynical , unemotional types ( see Debbie and Ross, ED )
Nobody can just get fed up with a relationship and quietly move on ( which is what happens in real life 9 times out of 10 ) A break up always has to be a big drama, with one or both parties getting ridiculously upset / angry about it, even if it was a pretty brief fling.
"I'll send for my things"
Who will they send? How will that person know exactly what to pick up, without a very detailed list (the frilly pink knickers, not the ones with braiding, and the black ones. But not the black ones with the hole)? Wouldn't it be easier for the departee to pick their own stuff up when the other person in the house is out?
Who will they send? How will that person know exactly what to pick up, without a very detailed list (the frilly pink knickers, not the ones with braiding, and the black ones. But not the black ones with the hole)? Wouldn't it be easier for the departee to pick their own stuff up when the other person in the house is out?
Wish EE would stop using the annoying "Dazed Market Walk". You know the one, it's happening just about every week. Where to show a character is confused or shocked he/she must for no reason stumble through the market whilst every Tom, Dick & Harry stares/knocks into/passes comment whilst hearing out of focus noise and the screeching sound of a passing tube train. MAKE IT STOP.
When characters sit against the front door in a puddle of tears after an argument, normally sliding down the door on their way to the floor.
When people want a private conversation they head for the nearest public place, usually the café or the Vic.
Want to sob your heart out...forget about going to your bedroom, take yourself off to Arthur's bench where you can be sure of an audience.
Want to sob your heart out...forget about going to your bedroom, take yourself off to Arthur's bench where you can be sure of an audience.
Every secret/affair you DO NOT want people to find out, particularly in EE, has been recorded on a tape/video/cctv and finally gets revealed at a party/Christmas, to a packed room/pub.
After a one night stand with some one inappropriate, the pregnant character gets as far as the abortion clinic, they go into the room and inevitably change their mind.
Two characters are having a conversation. Instead of facing each other, they both face the camera.
No pregnancy is ever planned.
If you are having an affair with your partner's father/brother/son/best friend, you still don't use contraception.
If you are having a secret relationship, you snog in the middle of the village/square/street in broad daylight.
If one character wants to hug another, instead of just hugging them, they say 'Come here', so the huggee goes to the hugger to be hugged. Do people really say this? Is it a Northern thing or just a soap thing? (They do it in Emmerdale and Corrie.)
Especially in Hollyoaks, young women with no visible source of income always have lots of new, fashionable clothes.
Long-lost, or previously unknown, relatives always arrive to stay indefinitely without first phoning, writing, texting or emailing to ask if it's OK.
No pregnancy is ever planned.
If you are having an affair with your partner's father/brother/son/best friend, you still don't use contraception.
If you are having a secret relationship, you snog in the middle of the village/square/street in broad daylight.
If one character wants to hug another, instead of just hugging them, they say 'Come here', so the huggee goes to the hugger to be hugged. Do people really say this? Is it a Northern thing or just a soap thing? (They do it in Emmerdale and Corrie.)
Especially in Hollyoaks, young women with no visible source of income always have lots of new, fashionable clothes.
Long-lost, or previously unknown, relatives always arrive to stay indefinitely without first phoning, writing, texting or emailing to ask if it's OK.
Originally Posted by attitude99:
“Every one of Phil Mitchell's wives being a doormat”
“Every one of Phil Mitchell's wives being a doormat”
Understandable though - if they had an ounce of backbone or self-respect they wouldn't be with Phil
Originally Posted by casualtyno1fan:
“9.) Everyone always seems to work in the same street. (Corrie's particularly bad at this - does anyone on this forum live in a street where everyone else who lives in that street work in the exact same street?!)
”
“9.) Everyone always seems to work in the same street. (Corrie's particularly bad at this - does anyone on this forum live in a street where everyone else who lives in that street work in the exact same street?!)
”
On the same theme...
if a character does have a decent job away from the village/street/square they will inevitably lose it and have to take any old job in the pub or market and never consider going back to their old career again.
Originally Posted by Howverydareyou:
“Wish EE would stop using the annoying "Dazed Market Walk". You know the one, it's happening just about every week. Where to show a character is confused or shocked he/she must for no reason stumble through the market whilst every Tom, Dick & Harry stares/knocks into/passes comment whilst hearing out of focus noise and the screeching sound of a passing tube train. MAKE IT STOP.”
“Wish EE would stop using the annoying "Dazed Market Walk". You know the one, it's happening just about every week. Where to show a character is confused or shocked he/she must for no reason stumble through the market whilst every Tom, Dick & Harry stares/knocks into/passes comment whilst hearing out of focus noise and the screeching sound of a passing tube train. MAKE IT STOP.”
That really is very annoying.
Originally Posted by EML:
“When someone buys a bunch of flowers, the recipient shoves them straight in the bin!”
“When someone buys a bunch of flowers, the recipient shoves them straight in the bin!”
Reminds me when someone makes shepherd's pie, the partner they have made it for comes in slightly late, so the person who spent time preparing it scoops the whole lot into the bin!
Whenever a hen or stag do takes place, the inevitable stripper must always single out the most unlikely character in attendance ie: the shyest/fattest/busybody/gossip/religious do-gooder by writhing with and depositing an item of clothing on them before continuing with the routine. The victim then throws off the clothing item in disgust while all the others present point and fall about in hysterics. In the case of a male stripper, he must also always seek out the gay character, who will love the one-to-one encounter.
For a start, stag & hen-do's have moved on greatly since the 70s. However, you do see an occasional departure from this - one of the best being Liam's in Corrie.
For a start, stag & hen-do's have moved on greatly since the 70s. However, you do see an occasional departure from this - one of the best being Liam's in Corrie.
Originally Posted by attitude99:
“Every one of Phil Mitchell's wives being a doormat”
“Every one of Phil Mitchell's wives being a doormat”
Agreed.
And Billy being Phil's doormat/gofer/bitch.
Originally Posted by kevin75uk:
“People pay for tea/coffee in a cafe 30 seconds away from their house.”
“People pay for tea/coffee in a cafe 30 seconds away from their house.”
I do that too
Originally Posted by Howverydareyou:
“Wish EE would stop using the annoying "Dazed Market Walk". You know the one, it's happening just about every week. Where to show a character is confused or shocked he/she must for no reason stumble through the market whilst every Tom, Dick & Harry stares/knocks into/passes comment whilst hearing out of focus noise and the screeching sound of a passing tube train. MAKE IT STOP.”
“Wish EE would stop using the annoying "Dazed Market Walk". You know the one, it's happening just about every week. Where to show a character is confused or shocked he/she must for no reason stumble through the market whilst every Tom, Dick & Harry stares/knocks into/passes comment whilst hearing out of focus noise and the screeching sound of a passing tube train. MAKE IT STOP.”
Ian did this last night!
To be fair I've done the same when Aldi are out of Hob Nobs.
People committing the most outrageous things, murder, arson, theft, adultery, etc etc, have the most horrendous rows with friends and neighbours, and the following week, all is forgiven and no one mentions it again.
Except when a long established character is accused of something terrible. is accused by someone who has been in the show about five minutes and everyone believes the newcomer against someone they have known for years and not one of the friends/neighbours ever stands up for the accused or has a good word to say for them.
Except when a long established character is accused of something terrible. is accused by someone who has been in the show about five minutes and everyone believes the newcomer against someone they have known for years and not one of the friends/neighbours ever stands up for the accused or has a good word to say for them.
Originally Posted by Makson:
“"I'll see myself out"
Do people say this in real life?”
“"I'll see myself out"
Do people say this in real life?”
Never.
It ranks right up there with that other stupid soap saying 'I'll get that' when there is a knock on the door.
The last-minute dash to the airport, train station, bus station, etc. to stop someone from leaving. Then the pursuer will get stuck in traffic and typically end up jumping in a taxi, or they'll steal a bike/skateboard/scooter and zoom recklessly through the streets ...
A character needs money so they go straight to the local gangster. No one can ever just agree an overdraft or a creditor agreement or go to a debt advisor ...
Everyone everywhere has slept with at least one other member of their current partner's family.
Most of the guests at weddings and funerals are completely random people we've never seen before. Close family and friends who have left the show will rarely if ever be there - even if, realistically, they'd be perfectly able to travel down for it.
A character needs money so they go straight to the local gangster. No one can ever just agree an overdraft or a creditor agreement or go to a debt advisor ...
Everyone everywhere has slept with at least one other member of their current partner's family.
Most of the guests at weddings and funerals are completely random people we've never seen before. Close family and friends who have left the show will rarely if ever be there - even if, realistically, they'd be perfectly able to travel down for it.
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