Arnold Schwarzenegger will be rather surprised .

One of the things that has appalled me is the use of this word - predatory. Its unleashed a real wave of homophobia which would not be agreeable if it was directed at women, blacks, disabled.

Underneath they are wells of homophobia...shame really...

What are you on about? I've made no comment about the James/Austin relationship. In fact tbh i haven't even thought about it. Your comment about actions only being disrespectful if the partner objects was what caught my eye. Many an abused male/female would most likely disagree i'd imagine.

Understand your point and agree to an extent. See my post above.

I'm just saying although predatory is s trigger word/ code homophobic term it's not proof of homophobia.

I'm going to use another example. It's like calling someone a monkey being racist. But if someone calls someone a cheeky monkey, even if they are black, it's not proof of racism. It's an indicator but I'd need other such indicators in order to conclude that's why they are using the term. It's an indicator of homophobia but it's not conclusive like faggot etc

I don't think Austen is in the least predatory but I do think people have the right to think he is without assuming they are homophobic. It's can be a difference of opinion based on his behaviour rather than his sexuality.

People agreeing/disagreeing with you thinking it wrong to use 'predatory' toward Austin is just fine . It's just opinions on a forum , but to try to claim the word as a homophobic slur is simply bizarre and not on .

I know you agree with me. But klook at the start of the thread. They are very homophobic opinions - generally from people who cant string one sentence together...

Thats fine


Sorry, but thats the old use of the word. I don't believe people want to be called homophobes and you are letting them off the hook..

That I agree with .
Personal example , in the Strictly thread I referred to Ainsley Harriot as "a possible dark horse" . Then I thought maybe someone might think it a comment on his colour and was about to delete it . I changed my mind and left it in as it was exactly what I wanted to get across and is a perfectly acceptable thing to say .. I despise homophobia but it grinds my gears when people see it round every corner or hidden in simple basic words or phrases .

Yet nowhere online can I find it used in such a way . Nowhere . Just from you .
I'd never let homophobes off the hook .

Its good that you despise homophobia but I am of the generation who recognises homophobia and stamps it out.

Been doing it all my life..

Well good for you , that can't have been an easy row to hoe and I commend your spirit and determination . But honestly, the word predatory is not homophobic in the present day .
Anyway , I've said my piece , so I'll bow out .

I think when we overaccuse it can lessen the impact do we should be very certain when we label something like homophobic. If someone is in the grey area I'll try and wait until they give conclusive evidence before calling them out.

Hang on, what has abuse got to do with anything?! That has even less to do with flirting than cheating.

What's next in your list of ever-escalating false equivalences, I wonder, genocide?

Not predatory! But he's been taking his chances slowly with James till then James let it go and played along and because he's by nature calm, composed soft appearing and deceptive appearance wise which made Austin bolder but today if you saw the live feed when they're both in the Swimming pool and Austin was getting all touchy feely with him, James offered a wrestling match picked him up and tossed into the water a subtle playful way of telling him it's not gonna work now and he backed off immediately to the other end of the pool http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qtWizFh2OuI&t=8m33s

The idea of predatory homosexuals is quite established. It's the philosophy behind banning people "promoting being gay", different ages of consent etc. it's associated with imagining gay people converting and influencing youths to be gay or assuming they are more prone to sexually exploit.

Well said

I'm bowing out...

Sorry Heatherbell, but you don't convince me.Calling someone a homophobe is short, succinct and gets my point across...

It has a long history of pejorative use with regard to gay men, especially in media representation. Media representation helps shape public perception/opinion/discourse. Therefore it's use in this context warrants examination at least, whether used innocently or not.

I don't have encyclopedic knowledge on the subject by any means, but even I know that 'predatory' is something regularly aimed at homosexuals, along with the idea that they are always 'trying to convert' and are somehow dangerous to anyone giving them the slightest 'opportunity'.


Exactly.

And saying it's not so is actually just not true, it's being ignorant of the use of the word in this context.

In fact, it's not a phrase that would be used if it was a straight friendship, people would say - 'he does fancy her a bit, and it shows' or something, or reverse the genders.

'Predatory' would NOT be used - especially 'a little bit predatory', how does that work?

Only in some homophobic context I'm afraid. As it's a very odd usage as the word 'predatory' is extreme in itself, and 'a little bit' sort of oxymoronic.

But sometimes people are ignorant in the sense that they just are unaware of oruneducated about a terms nuances. It doesn't mean they have a hidden agenda. I think that's why discussing it rather than labelling them can be constructive

That's true enough, but just look at the construction of that OP - 'a little bit predatory'.

Perhaps some actually don't realise that how they say things reveal what they themselves haven't really understood about their attitudes.

That happens a lot with a lot of things though and no harm actually meant, but, nevertheless, it makes it understandable that some will be very offended by it.

It's rude unjust and provocative and unfair

He's a hectoring bully, full of his own importance, the great I-Am. And he is creepy round James.

That's simply not true . We see and read it about BB a lot .
Tila was called predatory and creepy for her blatant OTT behaviour with James .
Chris (in the Helen Woods BB) was called predatory regarding his friendship with the much younger Ashling .
Michelle Bass was labelled predatory in her pursuit of Chicken Stewart .
Jade Goody with Pete .
So many I can't recall them all , but the word gets used on here every time and it's never been an issue until today .
I totally resent it being hijacked to make a point and rewrite dictionaries .

How can you be 'a little bit' predatory though? Why use the word in this strange oxymoronic way?

Somebody has to be OBVIOUSLY stalkerish and aggressive about it to be called predatory.

And Austin isn't at all - they appear to have an easy going but real friendship and they flirt a bit harmlessly in an ordinary way. So why shove in that term that doesn't fit? Even by the lights of the person that wrote it?