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Username Silliness (Part 3)


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Old 19-04-2016, 10:54
Picto
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Unfortunately I am very stoopid and very stubborn. Things need doing. There's only me. I've already put new linen on the spare bed for my daughter's visit and a load of washing on

Now I am going to re-lay the fire, and then the wood man is coming to deliver a load of logs I am wondering whether to play the old crock card and see if he would stack them if I offered him a fiver
I really don't think you should get wood in your delicate state.
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Old 19-04-2016, 11:04
twassington
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I really don't think you should get wood in your delicate state.
Too late. I got wood and I put it in my shed.

And that's not a euphemism
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Old 19-04-2016, 11:36
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Too late. I got wood and I put it in my shed.

And that's not a euphemism
You always go against the grain, don't you.
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Old 19-04-2016, 11:40
An Thropologist
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Unfortunately I am very stoopid and very stubborn. Things need doing. There's only me. I've already put new linen on the spare bed for my daughter's visit and a load of washing on

Now I am going to re-lay the fire, and then the wood man is coming to deliver a load of logs I am wondering whether to play the old crock card and see if he would stack them if I offered him a fiver
Yes I don't think some of the above qualify as light or gentle exerecise do they. Won't your daughter stack the wood for you. That's the sort of thing I do when I vist my Mum. SHe keeps a jobs list going (several infact one for each of me and my siblings geared around our inidividual skills) and when I visit I crack through the jobs.
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Old 19-04-2016, 11:42
planets
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WARD ROUNDS...

i see one of the patients is being difficult *tuts* don't make me send Jeremy Hunt round Twass.

my mum's like yours An, i've always got loads of jobs lined up.....she LOVED having me on tap to fix things when i was there!
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Old 19-04-2016, 11:52
twassington
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Yes I don't think some of the above qualify as light or gentle exerecise do they. Won't your daughter stack the wood for you. That's the sort of thing I do when I vist my Mum. SHe keeps a jobs list going (several infact one for each of me and my siblings geared around our inidividual skills) and when I visit I crack through the jobs.
But my daughter won't be here until Friday An, and the wood would get damp. I did it myself. A mixture of parsimony and pride prevented me asking the delivery guy, plus he's a local farmer so I knew he would be busy. I think it actually loosened me up a tad!

WARD ROUNDS...

i see one of the patients is being difficult *tuts* don't make me send Jeremy Hunt round Twass.

my mum's like yours An, i've always got loads of jobs lined up.....she LOVED having me on tap to fix things when i was there!
It wouldn't be safe to send Hunt here. I'd probably smash his crust in with a log.
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Old 19-04-2016, 11:53
twassington
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You always go against the grain, don't you.
I'm known for it
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Old 19-04-2016, 11:55
Picto
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But you're still poplar around these parts.
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Old 19-04-2016, 12:03
twassington
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But you're still poplar around these parts.
Surprising isn't it
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Old 19-04-2016, 12:05
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I was wondering if this was Twass's garden with all the wood in it?

Warning : NSFW.

http://metro.co.uk/2016/04/19/bizarr...rally-5826254/
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Old 19-04-2016, 12:10
planets
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I was wondering if this was Twass's garden with all the wood in it?

Warning : NSFW.

http://metro.co.uk/2016/04/19/bizarr...rally-5826254/
please drive carefully
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Old 19-04-2016, 13:59
twassington
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There are no todgers in my garden

Hobbled into the shop for some milk earlier like an arthritic octogenarian. Woman stopped by the crossing clearly in a hurry sat behind the wheel of her car impatiently. I stopped, smiled sweetly and said " If I could walk any faster, I would, OK?"

It's a miracle I've survived to this age really considering the mouth on me
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Old 19-04-2016, 16:29
Picto
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There are no todgers in my garden
Poppycock?
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Old 19-04-2016, 16:56
twassington
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No poppies either
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Old 19-04-2016, 17:03
Picto
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Do you have a bush in your garden?
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Old 19-04-2016, 17:16
twassington
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Do you have a bush in your garden?
Yes. You ought to see the topiary I've done on it
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Old 19-04-2016, 18:21
planets
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*rings bell for service*
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Old 19-04-2016, 18:42
twassington
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*rings bell for service*
You rang????
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Old 19-04-2016, 19:02
planets
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I'm looking for a delicious something yummy the pub was no good so i wondered if there was anything here?

I picked up my bleeding hearts for the garden today (i'm so excited i've been looking for somewhere that sells them since 2010 ) i bought two one white one and one ink one with white tails they are sooooooo pretty. But all the gardening of late has left me wanting something lovely that isn't salad, that hopefully involved chocolate.....
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Old 19-04-2016, 19:07
twassington
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I have two nukeable chocolate puddings with sauce, they are gluten free, I got them as a treat for my daughter who has IBS and gluten intolerance. You can have one of those with a topping of creme fraiche!
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Old 19-04-2016, 19:12
planets
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I have two nukeable chocolate puddings with sauce, they are gluten free, I got them as a treat for my daughter who has IBS and gluten intolerance. You can have one of those with a topping of creme fraiche!
ooo thanks i'd love the pudding, most kind........but you hang onto the creme fraiche i always thinks it tastes like gone off yoghurt
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Old 19-04-2016, 19:14
twassington
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ooo thanks i'd love the pudding, most kind........but you hang onto the creme fraiche i always thinks it tastes like gone off yoghurt
I also have Lidl magnumalikes in the freezer
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Old 19-04-2016, 19:22
planets
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I also have Lidl magnumalikes in the freezer
now you're talking!!!!

i was just thinking this afternoon i should get something for the freezer in case there's a nice day this summer.....there was one last year i think it was in May?
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Old 19-04-2016, 19:26
twassington
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now you're talking!!!!

i was just thinking this afternoon i should get something for the freezer in case there's a nice day this summer.....there was one last year i think it was in May?
I just thought bugger the weather, I'm getting some! I have ones with almondy bits in the chocolate or just chocolate coated. Or would you just like the whole box....only one's been scoffed!
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Old 19-04-2016, 19:29
planets
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I just thought bugger the weather, I'm getting some! I have ones with almondy bits in the chocolate or just chocolate coated. Or would you just like the whole box....only one's been scoffed!
ooooo almondy bits please, just the one thanks, i'm not greedy

i almost bought a magnum on the way back from the garden centre but i thought it would have melted before i got home and it's all twisty turny roads so best not to drive one handed!
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