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Username Silliness (Part 3)


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Old 29-12-2016, 17:08
twassington
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I suspect what ails you is drastic ham withdrawal it's very dangerous and an underestimated side effect of vegetarianism

*brings tray of tasty sandwiches and biscuits, cakes and fruit*
Thank you nurse planets, how very thoughtful! I am defrosting another bag of my mini ham as we speak I may also ransack the freezer for bacon!
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Old 29-12-2016, 17:10
planets
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Thank you nurse planets, how very thoughtful! I am defrosting another bag of my mini ham as we speak I may also ransack the freezer for bacon!
Very wise. Just ring the bell if you need anything I am on duty this evening
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Old 29-12-2016, 17:14
twassington
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Very wise. Just ring the bell if you need anything I am on duty this evening
Fabulous! I'll think of a list of stuff I needs
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Old 29-12-2016, 19:06
planets
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*brings in bowl of stewed apple and double cream for the patient*
*takes temperature issues two paracetamol and gives bed bath*
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Old 29-12-2016, 19:15
An Thropologist
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http://forums.digitalspy.co.uk/showthread.php?t=1574994

This is one of the nuttier threads from the SCD forum. Someone posted a link to it earlier - God Bless 'em. Its is possibly only out nuttied by the Every thought Terry M22 had about SCD eva and Pixie was robbed mega merged thread

This one explains how the entire population of Scotland were out on a grassy knoll one Bonfire night without a mobile phone between them. This meant the 5 million people who would have voted for Lulu, couldn't. This was obviously a conspiracy because everyone knows that a festival that commemorates a foiled Catholic plot to blow up the English parliament is naturally the MOST important festival in Scotland after Burns Night.

I love DS.
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Old 29-12-2016, 19:19
twassington
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*brings in bowl of stewed apple and double cream for the patient*
*takes temperature issues two paracetamol and gives bed bath*
My first experience of that was after having my son and his attempt to kill me in the process, I had both arms hooked up to blood transfusions so this whopping nurse arrived with a trolley and a steaming bowl of water and I lay there helpless while she scrubbed me
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Old 29-12-2016, 19:22
planets
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http://forums.digitalspy.co.uk/showthread.php?t=1574994

This is one of the nuttier threads from the SCD forum. Someone posted a link to it earlier - God Bless 'em. Its is possibly only out nuttied by the Every thought Terry M22 had about SCD eva and Pixie was robbed mega merged thread

This one explains how the entire population of Scotland were out on a grassy knoll one Bonfire night without a mobile phone between them. This meant the 5 million people who would have voted for Lulu, couldn't. This was obviously a conspiracy because everyone knows that a festival that commemorates a foiled Catholic plot to blow up the English parliment is naturally the MOST important festival in Scotland after Burns Night.

I love DS.
I remember those threads!!!! I think, i got a mention in the post of the day/week thread for something i wrote about Pixie i remember the weird Lulu Delusion. When this stuff happens it's like the mods have pumped LSD into the SCD Forum
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Old 29-12-2016, 19:24
planets
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My first experience of that was after having my son and his attempt to kill me in the process, I had both arms hooked up to blood transfusions so this whopping nurse arrived with a trolley and a steaming bowl of water and I lay there helpless while she scrubbed me
They aren't pleasant are they? i had loads of them when i was in with my large hole the nurses are so brusque, it felt like i was being sanded apart form the male nurse who took too long and made me feel there should have been dim lighting and scented candles
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Old 29-12-2016, 19:26
twassington
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They aren't pleasant are they? i had loads of them when i was in with my large hole the nurses are so brusque, it felt like i was being sanded apart form the male nurse who took too long and made me feel there should have been dim lighting and scented candles
You were lucky. I got the sandpaper treatment. She also remarked that my nether regions looked like they'd been hit by a bus and that I'd make a lovely corpse. The latter remark as I still managed to have rosy cheeks despite having just been relieved of about four quarts of claret Funny the things that stay with you
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Old 30-12-2016, 11:14
planets
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*brings in tray of crumpets and jam, pot of tea, fresh squeezed lime in tonic water, two paracetamol*
*plumps pillows*
*shakes out slanket*
and how is the patient this morning?
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Old 30-12-2016, 12:44
twassington
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*brings in tray of crumpets and jam, pot of tea, fresh squeezed lime in tonic water, two paracetamol*
*plumps pillows*
*shakes out slanket*
and how is the patient this morning?
I'm tempted to say still very ill so I continue to get this treatment I am improved for sure. I had to take my DIL to the doc this morning as she has to be careful due to the heart condition. She got an inhaler and antibiotics but it was me who got stared at in horror in the waiting room as I really do have a graveyard cough However, it's shifting. I know I don't have anything serious, not short of breath and no chest pain. It just sounds awful

*munches crumpets* I think I feel a decline coming on.....*slurps tea*....yes I need several days more sofa rest......
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Old 30-12-2016, 15:46
planets
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I'm tempted to say still very ill so I continue to get this treatment I am improved for sure. I had to take my DIL to the doc this morning as she has to be careful due to the heart condition. She got an inhaler and antibiotics but it was me who got stared at in horror in the waiting room as I really do have a graveyard cough However, it's shifting. I know I don't have anything serious, not short of breath and no chest pain. It just sounds awful

*munches crumpets* I think I feel a decline coming on.....*slurps tea*....yes I need several days more sofa rest......
*brings in tray of tea and christmas cake*
That's probably very wise you can't be too careful.
I have made it back home. I had a team of sherpas drive my stuff back in another car and unload it and carry everything upstairs for me
I am now in my pjs in bed
However i have a feezer full of delicious turkey rissoles and a massive jug of turkey broth i am not moving till after New Year!!!
Now I'm not old lady sitting i can concentrate on your care
*takes temperature* hmmmmmm *shakes head*
bed rest and turkey broth for you.....
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Old 30-12-2016, 15:59
twassington
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*brings in tray of tea and christmas cake*
That's probably very wise you can't be too careful.
I have made it back home. I had a team of sherpas drive my stuff back in another car and unload it and carry everything upstairs for me
I am now in my pjs in bed
However i have a feezer full of delicious turkey rissoles and a massive jug of turkey broth i am not moving till after New Year!!!
Now I'm not old lady sitting i can concentrate on your care
*takes temperature* hmmmmmm *shakes head*
bed rest and turkey broth for you.....
Oh how lush! Just what I needs. I made a broccoli and leek cheese earlier which I will have with two rashers of bacon for dinner tonight. What with that and the turkey broth I'll be well in no time!

Welcome home, I bet you've been looking forward to the peace and quiet
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Old 30-12-2016, 16:09
planets
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Oh how lush! Just what I needs. I made a broccoli and leek cheese earlier which I will have with two rashers of bacon for dinner tonight. What with that and the turkey broth I'll be well in no time!

Welcome home, I bet you've been looking forward to the peace and quiet
oooo that sounds lovely!!
I bought an emergency ham on the way home
i also smuggled 6 sprouts out they are still on the stalk and look like a bell stick for a dwarf (or my height) morris dancer

hehehehehe old ladies are very hard to wrangle they are so willful!
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Old 30-12-2016, 16:53
twassington
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oooo that sounds lovely!!
I bought an emergency ham on the way home
i also smuggled 6 sprouts out they are still on the stalk and look like a bell stick for a dwarf (or my height) morris dancer

hehehehehe old ladies are very hard to wrangle they are so willful!
That reminds me, I still have about ten sprouts still on the stalk sitting outside the back door keeping fresh

An emergency ham The great thing about hams is, they KEEP. It's in their nature. So one can be loitering in your fridge for a while waiting til the turkey rissoles run out
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Old 30-12-2016, 21:45
planets
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*brings in tray of tea and christmas amaretti biscuits*
*two paracetamol*
*keeps eye on captain america*
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Old 30-12-2016, 21:48
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Oh my gods, it's carnage round here. Glad you're home p, and twass that cold sounds awful, but I am NOT doing bed baths. I've left the hosepipe, yardbrush and febreze if nothing else works.

Kettle on for enough hot whiskey's until you fall asleep. (Thanks An for thread, will enjoy that later).
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Old 30-12-2016, 21:52
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*brings in tray of tea and christmas amaretti biscuits*
*two paracetamol*
*keeps eye on captain america*
Ha I see you're taking the nursing duties seriously. Is that any good? My favourite night out in 1970's Dublin was Captain America's.

Watching old crew trying out Japan for retirement.
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Old 30-12-2016, 21:55
twassington
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Ah thank you nurse planets. Normality is certainly returning tonight. I feel almost human again
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Old 30-12-2016, 21:57
twassington
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Thank you tk for the hot whiskey! Slainte and may your gods go with you
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Old 30-12-2016, 22:06
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Thank you tk for the hot whiskey! Slainte and may your gods go with you
Ah bless Dave Allen
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Old 30-12-2016, 22:16
twassington
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Ah bless Dave Allen
Indeed. My Dad's favourite, and a very funny man. I'll never forget the coffin race
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Old 30-12-2016, 22:25
tk096
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Indeed. My Dad's favourite, and a very funny man. I'll never forget the coffin race
My dad's favourite too, and think planets has a connection there.

More hot whiskey's everyone
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Old 31-12-2016, 01:16
planets
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My dad's favourite too, and think planets has a connection there.

More hot whiskey's everyone
evening folks! yes well remembered tk my best at school was his god daughter.
Funnily enough i bought my mum a Dave Allen dvd as a stocking filler this year!

Dylan Moran's delivery often reminds me of Dave Allen , the rhythm in his speech the construction of his anecdotes. (i adore Dylan )

*silently checks patient's obs and turns up hot hoddy I.V.*
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Old 31-12-2016, 07:27
twassington
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No wonder I slept so well, I was hooked up to IV whiskey all night Normal life is certainly returning
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