It's worth clicking on just to see James' drawn on '8 pack'

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz...-campaign.html

Exits thread, screaming

Reminds me that my brother once drew a sooty moustache on my uncle when he fell asleep in front of the coal fire

Good morning and welcome, Annie

Pull up a chaise. I get the feeling it's going to get messy out there.

Thanks Aggs. I've been a long term appreciator of non-appreciating. Forgot my user name and password so had to reregister. I blame the grape juice

So,
the longjumper, Will and Ballsup are tall enough for Natalie.

Which one will she get?

I'm thinking it might be Will.

Why did I look??? Why???? Yup, that 8 pack is 100% natural 🤔. Is it too early to drink to forget?

It's just sad that this is the route they're taking, instead of dancing, something they were respected for. He's a meedja genius that James Jordan!

Hello to Annie!

I wonder what Dr Hammy would have to say

Agreed.
Sad and seedy.

The Jordans are plumbing the depths of tackiness aren't they. And looking at those pictures (my eyes!) he looks positively creepy.

I'm certainly not appreciating all the hero worship of Greg going on at the moment. Fair enough that people like the bloke, but the way some seem to have his entire 'journey' on the show mapped out is seriously grating on me already... I just hope that he ranks based on what he does in this show, rather than preconceptions.

I'd say he's looking far more of an early candidate for 'got it in the bag' status than Jay did!

And it just got seedier...

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz...sing-room.html

With Bruce in the next room

The whole thing just reeks of desperation It's one thing when you see people from Geordie Shore doing things like this, but it's sad when they have an actual talent.

I like the bloke, but I don't see him as a dancer. I'm kind of hoping he gets Nat and then we get a Michael Vaughan-style series - a jive of epicness in week 2/3 followed by some dodgy latin then an awesome ballroom dance around week 5/6.

*wafts in*

Afternoon to one and all, and welcome to the new non-appers. Have there been discussions on staff requirements, so far? Are we retaining any from last year?

I'm quite looking forward to this series. I don't know half of them and will be too drunk to really care.

Not sure about the Olympian bloke. Didn't he whine about not getting more than a bronze?

Mrs Jordan was doing her best to appear sultry and seductive on one of the tabloids this morning.

Oh I don't really see him as a dancer, but it's been sooooo long since there's been any AK approved totty I'm in heaven, although this may change rapidly if he does as Iwan

* sashays in with Shemar and Idris in close attendance* (Well, someone had to drive me)

Staff auditions are on. Let's have some names. You know what we like. Nominees will have to:

1. Mix a perfect Negroni and a Manhattan
2.Be able to whip up Eggs Benedict or the perfect omelette at the drop of a fingernail
3. Dance like Usher
4. Carry two DOTS effortlessly, one under each arm.
5. Handle flawless back, shoulder and foot rubs
6. Hand wash pashminas.
7. Remove a suit jacket and tie with enough elan, bump and 'slither' to make us weep.
8. Be as funny as Clive James and Dara O'Briain.
9. Have fabulous legs. Shorts may be worn on occasion.
10. Tell wicked stories.

Got that? Splendid. Send names in please. P.S. Shemar and Idris are already in, so no repetition please.

Thank you darlings.

If Shemar is in, then I'm sorted

👏🎉🎉🎉🎉👏It's officially Strictly - Sofs is here
<mwah> Sofs - how are you doing?

It's like the bad promo for something like 'Confessions of an Ex-Strictly Dancer' with the part of James Jordan being played by Robin Askwith

I expect a Dissertation as long as the Chilcot Report on the topic.

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz...s-trailer.html

What has Louise done to Ward Robe and Vicky Giggles?

Saw that earlier. Louise has got a great figure, so why they dressed her in that frumpy mish-mash horror is beyond me. Bet Lesley Joseph refused to wear it as too 'old' for her. And, it also looks like they washed her hair in chip fat as well, poor Louise.

Still, it's marginally better than what they did to Chelsee Healey when she did the show.

Chelsee-Healey.jpg (630×850)
http://the-void.co.uk/wp-content/upl...see-Healey.jpg

She also looks like someone has poked her in the eye

Neither half is OK on it's own, but together.......

Is Tameka like a sparkly security guard, holding on to her to make sure she doesn't run off?

Glad to see that War Drobe are on top form. Clearly, Daisy is going to get all of the gorgeous, glamorous dresses while the others make do with the remnants. Claudia could wear Louise's top as a dress...

Poor Louise


Daisy, on the other hand looks fab. I don't know a thing about her, but she looks like a DOT