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The Pub (Part 48) |
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#2751 |
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Forum Member
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: Alba Gu Brąth
Posts: 125,162
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Morning twassock. That farmer bob has been reading my fortune and he says that Sr will be my employee soon and also I am due a big pay rise!!!!!!
![]() In yer dreams........Now go & get that snug hoovered out like you were told to do hours ago! *lobs hoover at chinny's fat head & kicks his lardy arse* Quote:
Ta muchly. The bright start here has blooming well evaporated already - so much for me washing going out!
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Tis' true.
*scarpers* ![]() You're barred! Quote:
Good afternoon.
Chicken chow mein please with prawn toast and veg spring rolls. Hurry up. ![]() Bugger off, this isn't a Chinese takeaway! Quote:
You know what, I always think that you are already the Pub owner. You do all the work and your charming personality is just right for a Pub landlord.
Promise you will sack Sleeps and ban twassington from the snug and give me back my account facilities. Farmer Mystic Bob is a genius. ![]() Hell will freeze over before that happens! Eejit! Quote:
I'll see wot I can do Eddy, howver I think we should allow twassock in the Snug for a suitable fee?
Afternoon trouble maker. *clinks* I am leaving Eddy in charge this evening as I am going to the Opera! ![]() The only thing you'll be seeing is stars........*blackens chinny's beady eyes* You are now on yer last warning! You better buck up yer ideas! Quote:
Wotchit you or yer'll get barred! It's my Pub! How do yer fancy being the new cleaner?
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A dream comes true. Thank you. You can trust me.
*Throws twassington out of the snug and locks door.* No weirdos are allowed in the snug unless they pay £10 for the management to overlook their weirdness. You can stay in the main bar, it's very nice there. *Goes behind bar, checks till, opens self a Pub account and charges a large brandy to it in celebration, starts arranging the drinks in alphabetical order, gives Chin a pay rise for the week.* ![]() ![]() That's it! Yer barred............*prepares very large bill for Eddy the Crook* Quote:
Afternoon all
Got to cheer myself up some how, so guess where I'm going next March?! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4hIpywjUiCQ ![]() Afternoon all. ![]() *pins up very large notice* Eddy the Crook & Bob the Chancer are both barred from the premises until further notice! Any member of staff serving them will be INSTANTLY dismissed! Chin is now on his final warning IE: His jacket is on a very shoogly nail! |
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#2752 |
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Forum Member
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: The Owl Sanctuary
Posts: 24,262
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Well, it was certainly worth waiting for
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#2753 |
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Forum Member
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: Alba Gu Brąth
Posts: 125,162
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Quote:
Well, it was certainly worth waiting for
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#2754 |
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Forum Member
Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: The United Kingdom
Posts: 14,997
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*heads for Attic, carrying large duffel bag on shoulder*
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#2755 |
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Forum Member
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: Alba Gu Brąth
Posts: 125,162
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Quote:
*heads for Attic, carrying large duffel bag on shoulder*
![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() *grabs hold of bob's duffel bag & yanks him back downstairs banging his fat head on each step* Gerroutofmypub! Yer barred until you can behave yerself! *slams door on bob's big red face*
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#2756 |
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Forum Member
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: The Owl Sanctuary
Posts: 24,262
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Pleased it meets with your approval. Oh & you're very welcome to make use of the snug any time you like (with no charge).
![]() ![]() As for Eddy arranging all the drinks in alphabetical order.......he calls ME weird! ![]()
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#2757 |
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Forum Member
Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: The United Kingdom
Posts: 14,997
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Quote:
![]() ![]() ![]() *grabs hold of bob's duffel bag & yanks him back downstairs banging his fat head on each step* Gerroutofmypub! Yer barred until you can behave yerself! *slams door on bob's big red face* ![]() *farts & exits*
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#2758 |
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Forum Member
Join Date: Jul 2007
Posts: 2,810
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* drops by *
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#2759 |
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Forum Member
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: The Owl Sanctuary
Posts: 24,262
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* drops by *
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#2760 |
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Forum Member
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: In Your Dreams
Posts: 26,443
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Good evening. ![]() Quote:
*pins up very large notice* Eddy the Crook & Bob the Chancer are both barred from the premises until further notice! Any member of staff serving them will be INSTANTLY dismissed! Chin is now on his final warning IE: His jacket is on a very shoogly nail! *Ignores and takes down illegal notice.* ![]() You seem to forget, Chin left me in charge. ![]() You are banned from the Pub until he returns. ![]() Welcomes back Farmer Bob and kicks twassington out of the snug. Continues to put all Pub drinks in alphabetical order, pours large brandy and charges account, awards Chin a generous bonus for all his excellent work.
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#2761 |
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Forum Member
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: In Your Dreams
Posts: 26,443
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#2762 |
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Forum Member
Join Date: Sep 2008
Posts: 116,685
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Quote:
Good evening.
![]() *Ignores and takes down illegal notice.*[/i] ![]() You seem to forget, Chin left me in charge. ![]() You are banned from the Pub until he returns. ![]() Welcomes back Farmer Bob and kicks twassington out of the snug. Continues to put all Pub drinks in alphabetical order, pours large brandy and charges account, awards Chin a generous bonus for all his excellent work. ![]() now bolt the course ! ![]() Evening Twass, & Twass, & Twass
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#2763 |
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Forum Member
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: The Owl Sanctuary
Posts: 24,262
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Evening Sleeps! That Eddy is getting too big for his boots
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#2764 |
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Forum Member
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: In Your Dreams
Posts: 26,443
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Good evening Sleeps, twassington.
![]() You should both keep your noses out of Pub business. It upsets Chin.
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#2765 |
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Forum Member
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: Alba Gu Brąth
Posts: 125,162
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*opens pub* Morning all
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#2766 |
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Forum Member
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: Alba Gu Brąth
Posts: 125,162
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I don't have a red coupon.
*farts & exits* ![]() ![]() Quote:
* drops by *
Pick that up! Quote:
Good evening.
![]() *Ignores and takes down illegal notice.* ![]() You seem to forget, Chin left me in charge. ![]() You are banned from the Pub until he returns. ![]() Welcomes back Farmer Bob and kicks twassington out of the snug. Continues to put all Pub drinks in alphabetical order, pours large brandy and charges account, awards Chin a generous bonus for all his excellent work. ![]() ![]() *pins up very large notice in various places in the pub (inc. the Gents)* Eddy the Crook & Bob the Chancer are both barred from the premises until further notice! Any member of staff serving them will be INSTANTLY dismissed! Chin is now on his final warning IE: His jacket is on a very shoogly nail! |
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#2767 |
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Forum Member
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: Alba Gu Brąth
Posts: 125,162
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So once again Camoron has been found out to be a liar..........offshore taxgate........it's all a case of, 'do what I say & not what I do!
![]() ![]() A private matter my arse! |
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#2768 |
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Forum Member
Join Date: Oct 2003
Location: Great Britain
Posts: 32,512
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Indeed it's the old Tory sleeeze again.
Morning Sr and peeps
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#2769 |
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Forum Member
Join Date: Oct 2003
Location: Great Britain
Posts: 32,512
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Good evening Sleeps, twassington.
![]() You should both keep your noses out of Pub business. It upsets Chin. ![]() *Sobs*
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#2770 |
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Forum Member
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: The Owl Sanctuary
Posts: 24,262
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Morning both. We all knew Camoron would be guilty to some extent. After all, he inherited Daddy's tax free loot!
If all the rich loophole in the law tax dodgers were made to pay up all the tax they or their predecessors SHOULD have paid, it would probably put the NHS back in a healthy situation.Builders and toast please! Dry yer eyes chin
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#2771 |
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Forum Member
Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: The United Kingdom
Posts: 14,997
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#2772 |
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Forum Member
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: The Owl Sanctuary
Posts: 24,262
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#2773 |
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Forum Member
Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: The United Kingdom
Posts: 14,997
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Quote:
Take that gin bottle out of his gob!!!Sssshhh...he's nodding off now, suckling away
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#2774 |
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Forum Member
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: Alba Gu Brąth
Posts: 125,162
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Quote:
Indeed it's the old Tory sleeeze again.
Morning Sr and peeps![]() Morning chinny ![]() Quote:
![]() *slaps chinny hard* Stop yer girnin' & start doing wot yer paid to do.....WORK! Quote:
Morning both. We all knew Camoron would be guilty to some extent. After all, he inherited Daddy's tax free loot! If all the rich loophole in the law tax dodgers were made to pay up all the tax they or their predecessors SHOULD have paid, it would probably put the NHS back in a healthy situation.
Builders and toast please! Dry yer eyes chin ![]() *clunk clatter* ![]() Quote:
*comforts Chin*
![]() What are you doing in here? Yer barred until I decide otherwise! ![]() Sling yer hook!
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#2775 |
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Forum Member
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: Alba Gu Brąth
Posts: 125,162
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Quote:
Sssshhh...he's nodding off now, suckling away
![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() *bashes bob over the head with the aforementioned bottle & kicks chinny awake*
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*Sobs*