Now now Eddy, I wasn't born yesterday, do I look wet behind the ears?? I know perfectly well SR isn't paying you a penny piece and you only got what you deserved from Sleeps.

You should have been a politician, with that forked tongue of yours

Listen lego napper, you're the cos of all the trouble in here, Instead of SR just talking about banning you & putting wee notes all over the place, Every time I see you in here I'm kicking yer arse out intae the car park, till you can behave
yerself, END OF STORY !!!!!


Fork tongue, hes lower than a snake wearing a top hat , that one !

*opens pub* Morning all.

Rain this morning, the garden really needs it tho'.

FFS! How many more months are Lizzie's birthday celebrations going on for?
Imagine if she popped her clogs during it?

Morning SR.....exactly! Who cares how old the lizard is anyway?? Such a waste of money! Off with all their heads, I say!

Mug of tea and a bowl of weetabix and milk please

Morning twass.....clearly there are loads of mad Englishers sleeping on the street so they can get the best place to have a very brief glimpse of her bloomin' face! What is wrong with them, I can't imagine there'll be many (if any), street parties up here!
And as for the £100 per ticket for the 'picnic', some people don't even have that to live on for a week! Disgusting!

*clunk clatter splosh*

Ta muchly SR. It is a disgrace. It should be free so that any mad Royalist can attend regardless of income. Better still it shouldn't exist at all and we'd be a republic!

*slurrp, munch*

Good morning you lot.



A glass of your finest champagne please. Thank you.

*Raises glass.*

A very happy 95th birthday to His Royal Highness The Prince Philip, Duke of Edinburgh and many happy returns.

*Downs champagne.*

Only just seen this, thanks for the add SR. Not been following it at all but wont say no to the prize if there is a HM15 and they are not a loser and go on to win

Good afternoon you lot.

Another glass of your finest champagne please. Thank you. A lovely day for a lovely lady.

*Raises glass.*

A very happy 90th birthday to Her Royal Majesty and many happy returns. Thank you ma'am.

*Downs champagne.*

Hi Eddy, I thought gin would be more appropriate for the occasion. *cheers*

Good afternoon.

Beautiful afternoon. Very sunny, very warm (just right for today's royal birthdays).

Jug of chilled Pimms with all the trimmings, out in the Pub garden.

Weres the mods when you want them, tae delete a few posts like this shite ???





It was her sister ( Maggie )( bungalows bird) that liked the gin the auld gin face that she was !!!

Afternoon Eddy, Davor, & all * Clunk *

* OoooooPppppppppppSssssssssss Trips over eddys leg with jug of pimms* & you've guessed right over his fat head !!!

Evening peeps *clunks* *clatters*

* Puts copies of my book the Attic my struggle and my poem the Ballad of The Attic* on sale for Pub customers*

*Sacks Sleeps*

Huh, you fool. That was my local yoof decoy. You didn't think that I'd fall for that old trick again.

Chin's told me to help myself to a free large quadruple brandy as compensation and a stella for the yoof. Thanks Chin.

*Grabs drinks, grabs remotes, goes to snug to watch Emmerdale.*

Bravo, bravo, bravo!!!

I'll get the food in. Any requests?

Well done Eddy! Yes tish 'n fips for me ta! Don't forget to leave a modest corkage for you know who!

Fish, chips, sausages, mushy peas, peas ... tuck in, it;s nice and hot.

Yes, I always leave corkage and a generous tip to that head waitress SR personage.

Good , good! *Tucks in*

Enjoy.

So very delicious.

Leaves 50p corkage/tip for head waitress.

Would you like to buy copies of my book and poem?

Yes please. And one each for all Pubsters, but give us a sample first.