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The Pub (Part 48)


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Old 02-10-2016, 07:41
twassington
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What are boots?
I know you hardcore it all winter in Birkies but I go into Uggs for Winter.!
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Old 02-10-2016, 07:52
Scots rool
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The last thing I needed last night was more alcohol

Morning all peepsicles. Black coffee and two paracetamol please

Why did you break in? How very dare you! *cuffs twass round the lugs*

*unlocks front door* Morning all
*continues countdown*

*goes off to check CCTV*
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Old 02-10-2016, 08:04
Scots rool
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Good evening all.

2 of my nephews took me out for a lovely and leisurely lunch today. We went to my favourite Italian, HERE.

Perhaps a little too much red wine was had. Never mind, Strictly is about to start so I can dance it off.

*Rearranges Pub tables to create a dance area. Lets Gorbals out of the Gents, calls Parton and takes to the floor.*


Let's jive tonight.
You are a complete eejit! Why would Gorbals be in the gents? You do realise that Parton (THE SHEEP) lives in there (By choice), & Gorbals is chinny's pet cat (which I gave him)? One can only assume you've been drinking on an empty head & making the most of the free wine. ROLLEYES
I hadn’t been out on my own since June. I couldn’t cross roads because I couldn’t see how far away cars were.

Went out today for the first time since my op. and my neck got a good workout twisting and turning and looking in all directions. I can see better than I could with my specs. I’m now slightly long-sighted rather than short-sighted and I now want to go to a museum because I will be ale to read the labels.
Welcome to my world. I'm long sighted too.
The most ridiculous complaints made by tourists

'I think it should be explained in the holiday brochure that they do not sell custard creams ...'

Take a look here, Telegraph, 01/10/16.

Good grief.
There are some morons in the world!
Drinks all round.
Joe left us £25 per night to spend, before he caught the 'MegaBus' to Salou
"just take it out of my wage packet" he said.

*clunks*

No he did not, you lying hound!
That's it, yer barred until you pay back wot you nicked!
Good evening Bob. Hope all is well with you. I'll help myself to a brandy. Thanks Sleeps.

As for you, you opportunist git, you're also barred until you cough up all you nicked!
Let's make it a LARGE metaxa Ed

*clunk*

*prepares two very large bills*
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Old 02-10-2016, 08:38
EddyBee
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Good morning all.

A very large tea please with 2 lightly buttered toast (brown bread) with a small portion of orange marmalade on the side.

Have you managed to get in any of the Sunday newspapers?


As for you, you opportunist git, you're also barred until you cough up all you nicked!
Can't you just deduct the monies from Sleeps' next salary? After all, he offered to pay.
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Old 02-10-2016, 08:49
Scots rool
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Good morning all.

A very large tea please with 2 lightly buttered toast (brown bread) with a small portion of orange marmalade on the side.

Have you managed to get in any of the Sunday newspapers?



Can't you just deduct the monies from Sleeps' next salary? After all, he offered to pay.

Don't you ''morning me'', you have no shame at all!

You can cough up the cash yer due before I even consider serving you! And as for yer abuse of Parton & Gorbals!

Joe did not offer to pay anything, bob is as big a chancer as you are! *holds out hands for cash*
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Old 02-10-2016, 09:09
farmer bob
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Morning All

*Reluctantly hands over ca$h to SR*

Wasn't Ed Balls super last night?

Now, could you do us some French Toast, ground coffee, some croissants 'warmed through' & fetch The Sunday Times, The Observer & The Sunday Telegraph please.
There'll be a handsome tip in it for you, if you don't delay.
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Old 02-10-2016, 09:11
EddyBee
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Don't you ''morning me'', you have no shame at all!

You can cough up the cash yer due before I even consider serving you! And as for yer abuse of Parton & Gorbals!

Joe did not offer to pay anything, bob is as big a chancer as you are! *holds out hands for cash*
I have no shame because I have done nothing wrong, neither has my good friend Bob.

*Hands over cash.*

However as a good will gesture I will settle my account and Bob's and take my business elsewhere this morning ...unless you've already gone out to fetch the Sunday papers???
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Old 02-10-2016, 09:18
farmer bob
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I have no shame because I have done nothing wrong, neither has my good friend Bob.

*Hands over cash.*

However as a good will gesture I will settle my account and Bob's and take my business elsewhere this morning ...unless you've already gone out to fetch the Sunday papers???
Fear not, Edward.
I paid SR, I insist.
The Sunday supplements are ordered too.
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Old 02-10-2016, 09:21
Scots rool
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Morning All

*Reluctantly hands over ca$h to SR*

Wasn't Ed Balls super last night?

Now, could you do us some French Toast, ground coffee, some croissants 'warmed through' & fetch The Sunday Times, The Observer & The Sunday Telegraph please.
There'll be a handsome tip in it for you, if you don't delay.

*snatches cash from bob's manky mitts*

I wouldn't know, I don't watch rubbish like that.

This isn't a bleedin' library, buy yer own papers!
Do you still want a breakfast?
I have no shame because I have done nothing wrong, neither has my good friend Bob.

*Hands over cash.*

However as a good will gesture I will settle my account and Bob's and take my business elsewhere this morning ...unless you've already gone out to fetch the Sunday papers???

Really! I think otherwise. *snatches cash out of Eddy's sticky mitts*

A goodwill gesture my arse! You know you would be barred if you didn't cough up.
As already discussed, this isn't a bleedin' library.......now do you want a breakfast or not?
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Old 02-10-2016, 09:24
farmer bob
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*snatches cash from bob's manky mitts*

I wouldn't know, I don't watch rubbish like that.

This isn't a bleedin' library, buy yer own papers!
Do you still want a breakfast?


Really! I think otherwise. *snatches cash out of Eddy's sticky mitts*

A goodwill gesture my arse! You know you would be barred if you didn't cough up.
As already discussed, this isn't a bleedin' library.......now do you want a breakfast or not?

Yes. And make sure the croissants are 'warmed through' please.


*tosses a farthing to SR*

*phones local lad to wheel newspapers to Pub*
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Old 02-10-2016, 09:27
Scots rool
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Yes. And make sure the croissants are 'warmed through' please.


*tosses a farthing to SR*

*phones local lad to wheel newspapers to Pub*
*scowls darkly at bob*

ENJOY & you can stick yer farthing where the sun don't shine!
HERE
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Old 02-10-2016, 09:33
farmer bob
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*scowls darkly at bob*

ENJOY & you can stick yer farthing where the sun don't shine!
HERE
Well, that's just splendid

*gnash, gnash, slurp, gulp, glug*

*Breaks wind exceptionally loudly*
💨💨💨
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Old 02-10-2016, 09:37
Scots rool
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Well, that's just splendid

*gnash, gnash, slurp, gulp, glug*

*Breaks wind exceptionally loudly*
💨💨💨

FGS it's like being at the zoo.........

Disgusting pig! *liberally sprays air freshener & opens all doors & windows*
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Old 02-10-2016, 09:41
farmer bob
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FGS it's like being at the zoo.........

Disgusting pig! *liberally sprays air freshener & opens all doors & windows*
Brrrrrr...chilly in here.

*retires to Snug with hefty selection of newspapers..snores can be heard..zzzzzz *paaarpp* zzzzzz*
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Old 02-10-2016, 09:42
EddyBee
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Fear not, Edward.
I paid SR, I insist.
The Sunday supplements are ordered too.
Well done. This place has gone seriously wrong since Chin took his extended break.

Ed Balls was hilarious last night. Whoever dressed him like that is a total genius.
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Old 02-10-2016, 09:43
farmer bob
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Well done. This place has gone seriously long since Chin took his extended break.

Ed Balls was hilarious last night. Whoever dressed him like that is a total genius.
*whispers*

Chin's up in the Attic.

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Old 02-10-2016, 09:47
Scots rool
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Brrrrrr...chilly in here.

*retires to Snug with hefty selection of newspapers..snores can be heard..zzzzzz *paaarpp* zzzzzz*

*marches into snug with hoover & air freshener* Gerrout of here, I need to clean this place, it stinks!
Well done. This place has gone seriously wrong since Chin took his extended break.

Ed Balls was hilarious last night. Whoever dressed him like that is a total genius.
Don't talk such rubbish! You take advantage of chinny all the time. You bribe him with food!
*whispers*

Chin's up in the Attic.


*scowls at bob* one more word...........
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Old 02-10-2016, 09:49
farmer bob
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*continues with countdown...*

*Roars off on moped*
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Old 02-10-2016, 09:58
Scots rool
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*continues with countdown...*

*Roars off on moped*
Grrrrrrrr........*shakes fist at bob*
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Old 02-10-2016, 14:35
Scots rool
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*makes sure everything is tickety boo*

Afternoon all. *pours self a large spritzer & puts feet up on bar* Ahhhhhhh this is the life. *sluuuuuuuuurp*
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Old 02-10-2016, 17:49
EddyBee
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Good evening all.

We've had a rather nice and sunny afternoon here and quite mild. Complete contrast to yesterday.

Tea please. You'll find me at my favourite table in the garden. Gorbals and Parton are joining me so I'll have 3 slices of your best fruit cake.

... You take advantage of chinny all the time. You bribe him with food!


Chin does not accept bribes. Why would I want to bribe him? What would I gain? Chin is a decent, honrest, hard-working, nice man. Sitting down after a hard day's work and enjoying a meal with a pal is not bribery.
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Old 02-10-2016, 22:28
Gemo52
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I know you hardcore it all winter in Birkies but I go into Uggs for Winter.!
Barefoot in the snow is fun.

You are a complete eejit! Why would Gorbals be in the gents? You do realise that Parton (THE SHEEP) lives in there (By choice), & Gorbals is chinny's pet cat (which I gave him)? One can only assume you've been drinking on an empty head & making the most of the free wine. ROLLEYES

Welcome to my world. I'm long sighted too.

There are some morons in the world!


No he did not, you lying hound!
That's it, yer barred until you pay back wot you nicked!


As for you, you opportunist git, you're also barred until you cough up all you nicked!


*prepares two very large bills*
I’m enjoying it after needing correction for short-sight for decades and the £1 reading specs mean I can see close-up too. I borrowed Mr G’s reading specs be they were too big and didn’t stay put but the little ones they sold at Tesco are just right for me.
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Old 02-10-2016, 22:30
Gemo52
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Four hours drive to the ost-wedding party, Four hours at the party. Four hours coming home. Done.
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Old 03-10-2016, 05:11
hooter
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Four hours drive to the ost-wedding party, Four hours at the party. Four hours coming home. Done.
You totally done it........have a easy day today

Morning McScots and all the pubsters......blooming chilly here this am


Nice hot cup of coffee plez.....ta
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Old 03-10-2016, 05:40
Scots rool
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You totally done it........have a easy day today

Morning McScots and all the pubsters......blooming chilly here this am


Nice hot cup of coffee plez.....ta

How did you get in? How very dare you break into my premises!
You now have yet another fine to pay, any more of this behaviour & you'll be up in that attic!
*holds out hand for cash*
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