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The Pub (Part 48)
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Rugby man
23-11-2016
Through no fault of his own, my Uncle crashed into a lemon tree.


He's still bitter and twisted.
twassington
23-11-2016
*snigger*

Evening all pubster parps. Lime and soda please Anyone serving??
chinchin
23-11-2016
Originally Posted by Rugby man:
“Through no fault of his own, my Uncle crashed into a lemon tree.


He's still bitter and twisted.”

*Groans loudly*

Originally Posted by twassington:
“*snigger*

Evening all pubster parps. Lime and soda please Anyone serving??”

Evening twassock *clunk*
twassington
23-11-2016
Ta muchly old peep. *glugl glugl glug*
Rugby man
23-11-2016
I got rid of my vacuum cleaner today.

It was just collecting dust.
farmer bob
23-11-2016
Originally Posted by Rugby man:
“I got rid of my vacuum cleaner today.

It was just collecting dust.”

*locks Rugby Man in the cellar*

twassington
23-11-2016
Originally Posted by farmer bob:
“*locks Rugby Man in the cellar*

”

I hope you locked him in there with a book of better jokes to learn!
farmer bob
23-11-2016
Originally Posted by twassington:
“I hope you locked him in there with a book of better jokes to learn!”

Did you erect the Edd-Stone what you won in the raffle daahn the Labour Club?

davor
23-11-2016
Originally Posted by farmer bob:
“Did you erect the Edd-Stone what you won in the raffle daahn the Labour Club?

”



Evening farmer bob. Do you have any free range eggs to sell?
farmer bob
23-11-2016
Originally Posted by davor:
“Evening farmer bob. Do you have any free range eggs to sell?”

No sorry

Help yourself to a drink though, Chin's buying
twassington
23-11-2016
Edd stone? I only won some chocolate money!

Ooh ta chins. Mine's a champagne cocktail
Gemo52
23-11-2016
Originally Posted by chinchin:
“Evening Gemo *clunk*”

Thank you.
Rugby man
23-11-2016
* breaks out of the cellar *

My girlfriend phoned me last night, and says "Come on over, no one's home!"


I got there, and there was no one home.
twassington
23-11-2016
Originally Posted by Rugby man:
“* breaks out of the cellar *

My girlfriend phoned me last night, and says "Come on over, no one's home!"


I got there, and there was no one home.”

Aaaaaaaaaaargh!!! *runs screaming to the hills*
Rugby man
23-11-2016
These got about 5 likes on facebook!
Rugby man
23-11-2016
I wanted to be an astronaut when I was a kid, but my parents told me the sky was the limit
soap-lea
23-11-2016
Originally Posted by Rugby man:
“I wanted to be an astronaut when I was a kid, but my parents told me the sky was the limit ”

Ooh a newbie with bad jokes in the pub... can someone get me a drink?
Scots rool
24-11-2016
*opens pub* Morning all

Christ on a bike! It's -6c!
Scots rool
24-11-2016
BANG BANG BANG CLATTER THUMP BANG CLATTER CLATTER CLANG CLANG CLUMP CLANG BANG! Yes just over there, no no, there *points* Yes that's it, brilliant.......carry on now.
chinchin
24-11-2016
Morning Sr and peeps
Scots rool
24-11-2016
Originally Posted by twassington:
“I'm ALWAYS nice to you

We got a bag each, it was worth losing for!”

Hmmmm........sometimes you're norty!
Originally Posted by EddyBee:
“Good morning everyone.

Cold here at just 8c, but sunny which is lovely.

*Puts cash into SR's grasping claws*

* Pours beer slops over SR's big head.* That's for destroying my slippers.”

You're gonna be very sorry for that action!
And yer slippers were walking away themselves, I just helped them on their way!
Originally Posted by EddyBee:
“Huh. You're not going to trick me with that old chestnut. ”

Well it's your loss, you'll be excluded from it all if there's any more of that behaviour!
Originally Posted by EddyBee:
“Good afternoon all.

Tea please with a large slice of Christmas fruit cake.”

There is no bloody Christmas cake until Christmas, stoooooopid greedy person!
Originally Posted by hooter:
“cooooooooo, is there chrimbo cake going?”

No there bloomin' isn't!
Originally Posted by EddyBee:
“Yes, for sure. Twassington is a tree hugging type of person and they don't eat chocolate unless it's made out of tofu or something like that.

I also pinched some mince pies from the Christmas party at the office next to mine because I wasn't invited. I'll leave them on the bar so help yourself.

”

How very dare you bring stolen goods onto my premises!
Originally Posted by Gemo52:
“Giving my eyes a rest from a computer screen all day.

… and I have knitting to do for a niece’s new baby which is taking ages ’cos I haven’t done any for such a long time.

I like the price of reading specs compared to what I had to pay for ones for my short sight. There’s a nought missing.”

The reading glasses from the £1 work perfectly well, that's what I use for reading or on my laptop. I don't like using my contact lenses unless I'm going outside.
Originally Posted by Rugby man:
“Seeing as I've been a regular for many years, I may as well make my drinks myself.

*clunk*

*clatter*”

What do you think yer doing! Yer going on the shoogly nail next time you pull that stunt!
Originally Posted by chinchin:
“*Groans loudly*



Evening twassock *clunk*”

I thought you told everyone I had put Rugby man in the freezer.........yet another of yer fibs revealed!
Originally Posted by soap-lea:
“Ooh a newbie with bad jokes in the pub... can someone get me a drink?”

He's hardly new, he's been coming in here for years.
Scots rool
24-11-2016
Originally Posted by chinchin:
“Morning Sr and peeps ”

Morning chinny *clunk*
farmer bob
24-11-2016
Morning

Don't mind me.

*heads up to Attic*
Scots rool
24-11-2016
Originally Posted by farmer bob:
“Morning

Don't mind me.

*heads up to Attic*”


*charges upstairs in hot pursuit & throws bob downstairs* That's off limits to customers! Sling yer hook!
chinchin
24-11-2016
Byeee peeps. Have a good day. *Leaves bugs and hidden cameras around to find out what's going on*
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