and I am heartbroken

I just wanted somewhere to - I dont know really - just somewhere that understands the heartache I am going through

I know it was the right decision and I know that I had to do it but it didnt make it any easier

She has only been gone for 4 days but it feels like an eternity - Olive was my entire world, she was my shadow and the house just feels empty without her

She went downhill really rapidly and I still dont know what was really wrong with her, she stopped eating, vet diagnosed asthma after giving her a chest x-ray and taking some blood but Im not 100% sure it was asthma but I guess I have to accept the vets diagnoses.

I know they did everything for her and they were even willing to treat her some more when I rushed her in on Thursday morning but watching my sweet baby gasp for breath was utterly heartbreaking and I knew that I couldnt prolong her suffering

sorry for the ramble

I dont expect anyone to read this but I just needed somewhere the write things down and express my feelings, I just hope that I dont feel like this forever but at the moment it feels like I will

RIP Olive - I love you so much baby girl and I am so sorry that your life ended this way, I did everything I could for you, I hope you know that and if I could turn back the clock, I would and I would do even more for you

I am very sorry to hear you lost your cat, I only have dogs but know the heartache when one of them passes.
But remember you gave her a good life and did the best for her in the end. All we can do really.

I understand your pain. I felt the same way when my dog passed away. They're always in your life, always need looking after so when they go it's devastating. And empty. Good luck getting through the next while. Day by day and slowly it will get easier. And it does help to talk about it. That too will also get easier, I'm sure you well up at the mention.

You clearly loved her very much katt. I'm sure she knew that and appreciated her long life with you. Its never going to be easy to see a loved one passing, but I think you did well by her.
Your feelings will get better with time - you'll be able to remember her happy days without the end being so fresh.
RIP Olive.

So very sorry for your loss, and l can completely understand your pain and grief.

I had to have our cat Molly PTS in October, my mother (who she lived with) could not or would not make the decision.

She had, had a vet come to see her who felt she was too old to have any invasive tests (she was 20) and he gave her a sterroid injection, he did hint that it could be serious.

Molly had stopped eating, had become skin and bone, had become antisocial (hiding herself away) and her back legs had stopped working properly. I arrived there and told my mother to phone the vet.

I had two hours with her before the vet arrived, and she went gently to sleep.

It was devastating, but the kindest thing we could do for such a wonderful little girl.

In November we adopted Tom, he was the neighbourhood stray/alpha male, who had been coming and going for 10 years, Molly and Tom hated each other, so he could not have come in before. He has been neutered, wormed and cleaned up, and is asleep snoring on a faux fur throw on the sofa, as l type.

He cannot replace Molly, and the guilt l feel is huge, for her death, taking Tom in, for not feeling the same way about him as l did for her (yet).

Molly was the fourth very long lived cat we lost, Tom is estimated to be about 15, all we can do is love and care for him while we can.

Katt I know exactly what you are going through. I was the same when I lost Amber to illness back in 2012. To be honest I had to get another cat as I couldn't bear to see the empty places in the kitchen and conservatory where her dinner plates and litter tray had been. Absolutely devastated, as we grow so close to our pets.

I've now got Lucy who at nearly 7 is probably at or approaching her peak. She is so energetic and full of life. I just want to make the most of her while the day is young.

I can only recommend that you get another cat - this will not be disrespecting the memory of your dear Olive.

They all have their own unique lovable personalities.

I had my 15 year cat put to sleep a while ago and know it feels. I got another cat a few months later and it helps a lot. You never forget them but life goes on and the little kitten we got from the petshop now has better life .

It will get easier with time and there is always good memories. Just remember they had the best possible life and 16 is a good age for a cat.

Pet losses affect me deeply so I know how you are feeling, it does get better but it hurts very much.

Oh katt, I'm so very sorry.

I recently lost my old girl (20 in July) a week and a half ago, but she wandered off so I've no idea if she's found an old lady to shack up with, but I suspect not. It bloody hurts so much, though, and I do know how you feel, but I think I'd probably feel a lot worse if I'd had to make the decision you made.

Very big e-hugs, katt.

RIP Olive. x

thank you everyone - your sweet and thoughtful messages mean a lot

xx

RIP Olive - I'm sure you had a wonderful life filled with love from your katt. I shed a few tears when I read this post - so sad.

I have been over what you are feeling Katt and it's not easy , reading this brought it back .

Think of the good times you and olive had together x

just popping back to say thanks again

I found myself at a rescue centre at the weekend and totally and utterly fell in love with a mother and daughter there

I really didnt expect to find myself falling in love with 2 kitties so soon after loosing Olive but I have and I made an application to become their new mum!

That application is going through so its looks like I will have 2 new kitties in my life - they are 3 years old and 18 months respectively, both girls and need to be rehomed together

its actually made me smile again and although I wont ever get over the pain and heartbreak of loosing Olive I do think she would like these 2 cats

So sad to loose a pet. Lost a few over the years, last one just wandered off in to the fields and never found him at all.

Still have Barley who will soon be 16, he had nose cancer 3+ years ago and had the tip removed. Recently having heart problems so on fluid and heart tablets. He will be our last (maybe).

Awww I'm so pleased for you, katt. I'm sure your two new girls will be spoiled rotten at the end of the first week. Good on you for taking them both on - I believe it's difficult to find a home for both halves of an inseparable pair.

The thing with cats is that even if we have 20 we still feel love for each and every one of them. We never seem to run out of the capacity for it, I think. It probably applies to dogs, too, but I've never had more than one at any one time.

Here's wishing you all the best, and I hope your two new ones will ease your pain a little. Have fun with them! x

Ahh - that's good news, katt

They'll never replace Olive, but will make their own place in your heart.

I just popped by to say I understand your loss and that Olive was a wonderful name, she sounded like a lucky kitty to have you as her mummy.
The new kitties won't replace her but you know that and we know that, but will help to heal your heart.

Good for you

You'll always have lovely memories of Olive, but you are giving a forever home to two new kitties.

Have you got them yet?

picked up the new cats on saturday morning

mother and daughter - 3½ and 18 months

daughter has settled in really really well, very affectionate, sweet natured little girl

mother - not so great - she is quite aggressive towards her daughter - hissing at her and swiping at her she wasnt like that in the rescue centre although I did only see them twice before taking them home

I dont know if its just an anxiety thing with the mum but I always thought the mothers cats didnt really take too well to having children stay with them..............

I will give it a couple of days and see if mum settles down......... the rescue place is going to ring me in a few days to see how I am getting on so I think I will probably mention it and say that the mother doesnt appear to be very happy..........

its quite difficult as the daughter is sooooooo affectionate and desperate for cuddles and tickles that mum just seems to back off and go sit in her bed - I have tried to stoke her and tickle her but she often hisses at me too - kinda dont really know what to do to be honest

any thoughts?

I assume mum is neutered? If not she'll want to drive off her rival as she comes into heat.
It could just be that the young one has reached that age where mum will force her to find her own territory. Not all cats do this, but maybe this one does. If so the kindest thing is to send one back to the shelter to be rehomed on their own.
You could try some feliway or, if you have room, keep them seperate for now and re-introduce in a few weeks?

I had a mother cat and two of her daughters until the kittens were 4. I was very surprised that our queen wasn't more 'cuddly' with them, but it seemed more that she was pushing them away to prevent them suckling her, like breaking them of the habit.

They never cuddled up together, the three of them, but they did get along. Ish. You wouldn't think they were related, though, at all.

Give the mum cat some time. Is there any way you can create a "mum zone" and "daughter zone"? For instance, not allow daughter upstairs, but allow mum upstairs? If mum gets her own little territory, she may calm down.

Good luck with them - I think they just need time. I wouldn't push it with the strokes and tickles, though. At first, ban the daughter to another room, to let the mum get a look in with your affections, and see how that goes.

x

yes, they are both neutered

mum was a lot better last night - I think she is just unsettled and perhaps taking her nerves out on daughter

I have an open plan house so its tricky to banish the daughter to another room, they both slept on the sofa last evening without any instances and they both came up to bed with me too

daughter is very bouncy (she is only 18 months) and tends to race around the house at times, this seems to spook the mum a little but she is getting better at being less spooked!

I think mum just needs time to settle in, get used to all the strange noises (I live in a terrace house so have neighbours both sides), new smells etc etc

thanks guys for the advice - appreciate it

I have only just come across your thread Katt, but I hope it all settles down soon for you!.... I myself keep thinking of getting a cat or kitten and am always looking on the RSPCA website.... they are great with all the rescues they do, they often do say the same about two cats/kittens,.. 'must be homed together'..... it makes you wonder if after your experience that is really necessary?...... because I bet if you had just taken the mum she probably would have been fine on her own?.... that's not for me to say though!, just a thought!...... But.... I do hope these two turn out to be a really great addition to your home and help to mend your broken heart just that little bit quicker...

I guess the rescue centre can only go by what the owners of the cats tell them - to be honest I am not convinced that these 2 needed to be rehomed together and I think that for the sake of my sanity and the well being of mother and daughter, one will sadly have to go back

I hate that I am thinking like this and I dont want to have to send one back but mother is definately NOT a happy girl at all

I will give them a few more days to see if mum actually settles down and stops batting her daughter around the head every time she goes near but but I cant see it happening to be honest

Katt, you have my deepest sympathies - I'm facing that decision tonight, and it's breaking my heart. However many pets you have, you never get used to having to make the final decision. It hurts, even though you know it's the right thing to do.