On saturday night i had to take my beloved 10 year old cavalier to the vets to be PTS. His belly had filled with water following congestive heart failure. He was drained about a month ago but it filled up in a day so big he was uncomfortable.
The vet took him off to put a cathater thing in his leg and i said i would stay to be with him. Now i cant get the sad scared look he was giving me out my mind. I was hugging him and telling him how much i loved him he must have thought i am mental. Then he put the injection in and he started slipping away and collapsed on the table.
I cant get the images out my mind, i have had nightmares the last 2 nights about it i dont know what to do. I thought i would be strong but i was a mess and now i feel guilty i scared my dog in his last few moments. I cant believe he has gone.

As animal owners we all have a responsibility to look after them throughout their lives, and then do the right thing when that very sad time comes around.

My sympathies marc. I have had to do this more than once, and it doesn't get any easier.

Some people leave their animals to suffer, but you did the right thing for the old boy when he needed it. Console yourself with that.

http://www.kiplingsociety.co.uk/poems_dog.htm

Marc it doesn't seem like it now but I promise it will get better with time, it's all raw and new now and you have to allow yourself time to grieve properly. You have done brave and most loving thing you can for your little boy, he was lucky to have you as an owner and you were lucky to have him. It comes to us all in the end and being there for them is most loving thing we can do.

Most people on this bit if the forum have been through it and survived a bit battered and eventually a bit wiser. So if you need to talk we are here for you.

Marc, Im so sorry

I have recently had to make the terribly painful decision to have my 16 year old cat PTS and I am still broken up at my decision BUT I know it was best for her - it was only 11 days ago and I am still struggling to adjust to life without her BUT it has gotten easier - my cat was also scared and had an awful look in her eyes BUT you must try and push that image from your head and REMEMBER THE GOOD TIMES YOU HAD WITH YOUR DOG - I cant tell you when it will get easy but take it from someone who is pretty much going through the exact same feelings as you just 11 days ahead - the pain and heartache does get easier and you will never ever forget the good times you had with your dog, the love you gave each other and the bond that you shared together - you did do the right thing, no matter how hard it was and believe me, I know how hard it was to do

It will get easier

These little guys are adorable.

Its never an easy decision to have to make. The important things to remember you were there, you were the last thing he saw, the last thing he felt. He's no longer in pain, he's bouncing over the rainbow bridge.

If its any additional comfort, I saw a vet cry after PTSing an animal, our appointment was late while she settled herself down

Sympathy all around

Am so sorry for your loss. As people have said your little friend is at peace and not suffering, you comforted him in his final moments and he will have loved you for it.

Time really does heal.

Marc if you hadn't acted you would be beating yourself up that you let him suffer. Too soon? Too late? I know someone whose dog died a terrible death on the way to the vets and they couldn't forgive themselves for not acting sooner. You almost can't win.

But your decision was a brave thing born out of love. It's what many of us would wish for ourselves. Hope you can take some comfort in that and that things will get easier x

I'm so sorry. I know how much it hurts and I do understand how you feel. It's the final act of love we can show them to help them when they need it but it's the hardest thing to do. I'm sure your head knows it was the only thing to do but your heart says otherwise.

I know everyone says it but time really does ease how you feel and you will be able to look back on your time together and smile at the happy memories. We lost our girl unexpectedly at xmas and I thought I would die. It hasn't eased much and I still have good and bad days but it does get easier but very slowly.

Letting go is the heavy price we pay for loving them but he knew he was loved at the end and that's what matters, you were there for him -hugs x

You have nothing to feel guilty about OP. It's awful losing a beloved pet.
Best wishes to you.

I'm hoping you're feeling a little bit better today, marc. I'm so very sorry.

It is difficult and I still miss Mickey who we had to say good bye to last July, full of guilt but it was the right decision because the alternative would have been unfair. I still feel like Micky so desperately wanted to live but his body wouldn't let him and it would have been selfish to continue.

Your dog would have been even more scared had you not have been there!