Top of the Pops 4th February 1982
Our head Zoo-keeper for tonight's entertainment is the unflappable & sardonic John Peel, an absolute legend who's presentation style is both relaxed, authoratative and understated. No jigging whatsoever as JP doesn't need to, so without further ado..
Item 1 on the agenda
(40) THEATRE OF HATE – Do You Believe In The Westworld?
This always sounded to me like a slightly speeded up & modernised version of Crazy Horses by the Osmonds with the track's driving guitar, but by comparison this one had little horse power.
I like tracks a little bit out of the ordinary & remember this one well, but the Great British Record buying public agreed the track was so out of the ordinary they didn't buy it.
I think if you had to put a case forward as a teenager, nagging your parents to watch Top of the Pops for the first time this definitely wasn't the best opener to persuade them to permanently change from Emmerdale Farm. Kirk Brandon carries his performance with a swagger a bit like Joe Strummer, but doesn't have the most varied tone, the yelping not helping half way through which might be irksome but nowhere near the irritation factor of the wooping & hollering from the infernal Zoo.
More of that later unfortunately. Decent stab but probably more at home on "The Tube".
We cut back to JP introducing the next turn with a bestockinged lady decked out in a Legs & Co. cast-off from the rootin' tootin' Ottawan routine. Yeeeeeee-haw!
(6) ORCHESTRAL MANOEUVRES IN THE DARK – Maid Of Orleans (The Waltz Joan Of Arc)
The intro of the track & the sight of the "McCluskey Flail" couldn't have put many people off as this single & the superb Architecture & Morality album were really burning up the charts. A highlight for me but pretentious for some, it's hard to resist not tapping a foot to the driving rhythm when it winds up & a near impossibility not to sing along with the "Der Der Der....Der Der Der....Der Derrrrr....Der Dee Derrrr" of the melody if it comes on the radio.
There's no point denying it, we've all done it!
Full marks also to the audience member doing some 'air drumming' (In time too, unlike the real one) & Andy McC not demolishing the mic stand mid-flail. I enjoy most of OMD's material, but suspect like many I suffer from overfamiliarity of tracks in their catalogue such as "Locomotion" (slightly unfairly), but that's only down to lack of imagination by Radio playlisters. I suspect however OMD don't mind the PRS cheques!
Their lesser known tracks "So In Love" and "Secret" I have a particular fondness for their melodic content...
OMD "So In Love"
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mD8TApX3btM
OMD "Secret"
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EtYre1GABao
JP introduces us to some rudimentary Frenglish, thankfully not whilst wearing a horizontally striped jumper & a string of onions whilst impersonating the accent with "Hau-hee-hau-hee-hau", which I suspect our resident Cliff Richard impressionist Mike Read would've almost certainly done.
(47) THE JETS – Love Makes The World Go Round
I used to have one of those jacket/cardigan combos, but not in that shade of yellow visible from space & sponsored by Fyffes bananas the Jets are wearing which are more No-De-No than Hi-De-Hi. Mine was pastel blue as I remember & washed very well indeed at lower temperatures, but I digress.
I quite like some different takes on tracks & think the Jets gave this one some beans compared to the Perry Como original, but the band & concept were a one trick pony, albeit an enjoyable toe-tapping one.
Fair play for the effort trying to make this one more distinctive by featuring an accompanying hand-jive complete with a sedentary booted Fairbrass, many of whom on here would agree he looks
more than capable of 'holding his own' in any hand-jive competition
I enjoyed it & overall a good job, but "I'll have a copyright claim please Bob"
(click)....
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5Z_uqL8opW8
Next up....Ruddy hell, its....
(20) SOFT CELL – Say Hello Wave Goodbye (video)
Torch I suspect was in seventh heaven along with almost all other forumites for this barbed tale of a relationship gone wrong for a bachelor visitor to a dodgy cocktail bar with an even dodgier (only in the 80's) title of the 'Pink Flamingo'. What kind of establishment could that possibly be? It's possible it could be the same one Susan Sulley from the League developed her waitressing skills before Phil Oakey picked her up, shook her down & turned her around, presumably in a Rover SD1 as it's only down the road from Leeds to Sheffield.
The gent in the lyrics should've known the lass he met wouldn't be a match made in heaven due to the company she keeps and the lyrical hints at her occupation, but the pay off for us is a truly fantastic track.
Bleak and unpretentiously honest, and one I suspect will make many forumites Top 10's. And rightly so.
(25) GILLAN – Restless
It's a risky business being a member of a rock band on TOTP as there's constant friendly fire courtesy of the Pyrotechnics Department. Gillan unwisely trusted them to get the cordite right and the audience are treated to a 3-minute recreation of the Battle of Waterloo. Thankfully the shrapnel never reaches the audience & a PTSD claim from the Gillan drummer proved unsuccessful.
Hang on, I knew I'd forgot something... the music! The cover of "New Orleans" was a Top tune in '81 and although this one won't reach the same heights, personally I thought it was a pretty decent track, Ian Gillan giving it raucous vocals and backed by a solid & dependable band.
For some reason I thought the bald guitarist has the look of one of them dodgy geezers you have to see to get overpriced tickets for New Years' Eve in a pub, but I digress (again)
(R).
(12) SHAKATAK – Easier Said Than Done
A mate of mine I used to work with referred to his toiletry activities as 'going for a Shakatak'. I suspect the activity he was referring to was going for the runner up position in the Top 40 rather than 'hitting the top spot', but I didn't want to delve further so this mystery remains mercifully unsolved.
A second turn on the Pops fell fortunately for JP as 'me old mate' & ex-BBC studio manager Bill Sharpe appeared, although a few Years later Gary Numan would seemingly develop an extreme allergy whilst working with Sharpe, when Numan's hair turned blue and he began to look like a negative.
Exhibit A
https://www.discogs.com/Sharpe-And-N...release/403973
The cameraman obviously got bored filming Shakatak & focussed his attentions on Greco-Roman Zoo #27, as presumably he was admiring the quality of stitch finishing on her dress. I was concentrating on Sharpe's 'ivory tinkling' & it's no word of a lie.
Lookout for the bloke at the back with the 'tache & the party hat near the screen, a recent successful graduate from the McCluskey School of Dance.
Shakatak for me are at the tolerable end of the Jazz spectrum as they sway more towards soul, so this one gets the thumbs up.
Nnnnnnnnice.
(14) AC/DC – Let’s Get It Up (video)
Ah, love is a sweet and tender flower which carefully nurtured can blossom and bloom into perfect shared unity. Or you could be AC/DC & therefore your intentions may be less than gentlemanly & the end result is a shotgun wedding as a result of going for a quickie with a groupie behind a kebab shop.
AC/DC have some fantastic licks courtesy of Angus Young & inhabit gravelly-voiced Rock nirvana with Brian Johnson, but on occasion drift into becoming a parody of themselves. This is such an occasion, as on close inspection this track would seem to be the inspiration for Spinal Tap's "Big Bottom".
Let's examine the lyrical evidence...
Loose lips sink ships
So come aboard for a pleasure trip
It's high tide, so let's ride
The moon is rising and so am I
Cruising on the seven seas
A pirate of my loving needs
I'll never go down, never go down
So let's get it up
Let's get it up, get it right up
Let's get it up, right to the top
Let's get it up, right now
Mills & Boon it ain't & I'm amazed Angus Young's head hasn't fallen off by now.
(15) XTC – Senses Working Overtime
XTC I thought would fit in beautifully as top billing at the Trumptonshire Music Festival over at Windy Miller's gaff, such is the unique Englishness vibe they exude. A great British band. As previously mentioned it's not a favourite of mine due to the Partridge nasally slow whyyyyyyyy-nyyyyyy bits contained within, but XTC do an excellent confident stompy performance on the show nonetheless.
As a bonus, Andy P states all the world is biscuit shaped which I'm sure will please Rich Tea no end when he returns.
(21) GEORGE BENSON – Never Give Up On A Good Thing
It's that time of the show folks we all look forward to, but the chap & chapesses do a decent routine, nicely done with the lucky bloke getting 'close but no cigar' with Sidney Haywoode. The track is classic soul/dance & I like most George Benson's material c. Give Me The Night, although this one's nay bad either.
Unfortunately, the whole song is ruined by what sounds like a pack of screaming hyenas being chased by rampaging Red Indians, with random Tourettes un-subtitleable shouting thrown in for good measure.
That'll teach George Benson not to make a video or get his arse on a plane.
(7) CHRISTOPHER CROSS – Arthur’s Theme (Best That You Can Do) (video)
A Wika-dee Wika-dee Wika-dee Wack!
He might not be one of the world's most handsome or charismatic performers, but I find Kris Kross' voice a tonic even though by some he's regarded as a bit dull. This track for me I find just 'OK', benefitting hugely by a leg up from the Arthur film.
His self-titled album with Michael McDonald's backing vocals seem more evocative of the sound he aimed for. You can almost smell the seaweed of West Coast America, or it could be bullshit.
“Sailing” & “Ride Like the Wind” are my highlights of his back catalogue
(R).
(1) KRAFTWERK – The Model (video)
Unbelievably 3 Years old by this point, Kraftwerk finally got the recognition they deserved with this stunning piece of electronica, together with the equally good flipside Computer Love.
"The Man Machine" album, along with the much sampled "Trans-Europe Express" still remain IMO a blueprint for most modern music even after nearly 40 Years, and are rightly lauded. For officionados of Electro, the Francois Kevorkian 12'' Remix of "Tour de France" takes some beating
(R).
Clickety...
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZV1Qmd07NmQ
(5) MEAT LOAF – Dead Ringer For Love (crowd dancing)
Presenting's no job for a claustrophobic in these adverse conditions, but JP makes it to the end despite no obvious exit strategy.
The WMD laser in Herr Hurll's arsenal looks like it's had a major upgrade from last Week's test kettling of Alton Edwards, so much so it now looks more like the prototype for the latest planet-destroying Death Star than a weapon of entertainment in the studio arena. The lights dim in the studio any time it's used in anger so it's probably not too effective, apart from on Alton Edwards which is a good thing.
More forensically analysed foibles coming to a forum near you soon & an
8/10.
JP a refreshing change & there was no "bomber for your ears and eyes as well" which is always a bonus...
Nos da pop pickers