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Heathers chair and other soft furnishings.


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Old 25-06-2016, 23:45
melloncollie06
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I've been bitten to bits by midges
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Old 25-06-2016, 23:52
bangle1
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I've been bitten to bits by midges
I think the chez has a flea infestation
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Old 25-06-2016, 23:53
EVIL-MONKEY
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I'm waiting for the announcement from J that explains that he know's he isn't because he's infertile (so he's happy to sleep around).

*On Heathers instructions goes and gets sledge hammer and pummels Jack*

"The wine's just for Heather ok!"
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Old 25-06-2016, 23:55
bangle1
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I'm waiting for the announcement from J that explains that he know's he isn't because he's infertile (so he's happy to sleep around).

*On Heathers instructions goes and gets sledge hammer and pummels Jack*

"The wine's just for Heather ok!"
BIB Or he only ever did her up the poop chute.
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Old 26-06-2016, 00:02
melloncollie06
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BIB Or he only ever did her up the poop chute.

but without being too graphic (OK with being graphic!) if he did, it could have err... dribbled down to her foof.

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Old 26-06-2016, 00:03
EVIL-MONKEY
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BIB Or he only ever did her up the poop chute.
He could think/say such a thing... oh wait I have previously and lets face it they have.
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Old 26-06-2016, 00:05
EVIL-MONKEY
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We're classy people here!
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Old 26-06-2016, 00:12
bangle1
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but without being too graphic (OK with being graphic!) if he did, it could have err... dribbled down to her foof.

Poor Jack's gonna have a coronary when he reads that
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Old 26-06-2016, 00:29
jack_blair
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I've been bitten to bits by midges
Jimbob?

having seen what he's capable of doing while on his knees in short VTs where he was laughing and off his face, i am suprised it took so little to put you off him so recently ?
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Old 26-06-2016, 00:31
jp761
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I like Letishya on BB
She's one of the bigger characters in there , in more ways than one.
You love her Carol Voderman bum! Don't blame you..

My massage chair will fit it in.. it's a big chair!

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Old 26-06-2016, 00:31
jack_blair
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I'm waiting for the announcement from J that explains that he know's he isn't because he's infertile (so he's happy to sleep around).

*On Heathers instructions goes and gets sledge hammer and pummels Jack*

"The wine's just for Heather ok!"

THAT IS A VERY VALID POINT EVIL
WELL DONE !
YOU'VE CRACKED IT

Jimbob may not be able to have children
so he can prove she's a liar , if push comes to shove
but he doesn't want to say anything yet , so's not to embarrass himself or put off any prospective bunk up .
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Old 26-06-2016, 00:33
jack_blair
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You love her Carol Voderman bum! Don't blame you..

My massage chair will fit it in.. it's a big chair!

i don't fancy Vorderman
She'd get me to recite times tables while we were at it, and i'd find that really boring

That chair looks so comfey
What's that handle for , oops , you ok jp?
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Old 26-06-2016, 00:40
Rogana Josh
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they have a yurt section and tents that are already erected
it's like a VIP part of the Festival, mod cons, bit of comfort
They're not that expensive though
It's just the mud
That's me sorted then
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Old 26-06-2016, 00:48
Rogana Josh
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BIB Or he only ever did her up the poop chute.
Another option, or he only ever had BJ's
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Old 26-06-2016, 00:50
Rogana Josh
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but without being too graphic (OK with being graphic!) if he did, it could have err... dribbled down to her foof.

He could suffer from Premature Ejaculation
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Old 26-06-2016, 00:50
jp761
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i don't fancy Vorderman
She'd get me to recite times tables while we were at it, and i'd find that really boring

That chair looks so comfey
What's that handle for , oops , you ok jp?
Prostate massage leaver....

Ok fine you want a go... be my guest
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Old 26-06-2016, 00:55
bangle1
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Another option, or he only ever had BJ's
He could suffer from Premature Ejaculation
Prostate massage leaver....

Ok fine you want a go... be my guest

I should have known mentioning te poop chute would destroy the tone of the thread
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Old 26-06-2016, 00:58
Heatherbell
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jp put up a lovely chair, it reclines
So do I . If I'm knackered enough I can recline on a sack of nutty slack without any need for a wee lever to assist me .
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Old 26-06-2016, 01:07
jack_blair
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Prostate massage leaver....

Ok fine you want a go... be my guest
haha
I'll only go on it if it is a vibrating chair , like those hydro bed things
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Old 26-06-2016, 01:07
Rogana Josh
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So do I . If I'm knackered enough I can recline on a sack of nutty slack without any need for a wee lever to assist me .
You can do that now, Heather without permission from Brussels
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Old 26-06-2016, 01:08
Rogana Josh
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haha
I'll only go on it if it is a vibrating chair , like those hydro bed things
Ooh! You are awful! jack
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Old 26-06-2016, 01:09
Heatherbell
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I'm waiting for the announcement from J that explains that he know's he isn't because he's infertile (so he's happy to sleep around).

*On Heathers instructions goes and gets sledge hammer and pummels Jack*

"The wine's just for Heather ok!"
My hero . 💘

Cops just called . Yep, half past midnight .Dedication .
Can't trace that licence plate or any permutation of it, other than to a white van on t'other side of the country . Reckon it's a cloned one being used . Bast@rds . Nothing to do now but get the damn car fixed from our own pockets . Couldn't have come at a worse time financially , but hey ho , nobody died .
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Old 26-06-2016, 01:19
Heatherbell
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but without being too graphic (OK with being graphic!) if he did, it could have err... dribbled down to her foof.

Exactly . That's as safe as pulling out at the crucial moment ....as in not very safe at all .
All it takes is one little adventurous sperm training for Rio to go off piste and whoosh ! he'll be in there causing chaos as his mates lag behind smoking an after-jiggy ciggy in the back alley .
One.
Little
Swimmer .
👶
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Old 26-06-2016, 01:21
jack_blair
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My hero . 💘

Cops just called . Yep, half past midnight .Dedication .
Can't trace that licence plate or any permutation of it, other than to a white van on t'other side of the country . Reckon it's a cloned one being used . Bast@rds . Nothing to do now but get the damn car fixed from our own pockets . Couldn't have come at a worse time financially , but hey ho , nobody died .
It's really efficient the police have got back to you and being so late too.
Some twits who can't drive in car with fake plates , utter sh*tes.
Sorry to hear that.
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Old 26-06-2016, 01:22
Heatherbell
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I should have known mentioning te poop chute would destroy the tone of the thread
Honestly bangle , I wonder why we bother trying to be polite and decent .
This lot , tut tut tut .
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