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Old 03-07-2016, 11:47
Nobbyspiles
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Barbara to Twiggy, "Will you have some of this dinner ?",

Twiggy "You know me Barb, I'll eat any old shite". (Or words to that effect)
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Old 03-07-2016, 11:54
CD93
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Every time...

Jim: Look at that gobshite (Chris Evans)...full of himself. He's like my arse, best kept out of sight.
Denise: He's a millionaire him, Dad.
Jim: Yeah and he's still got ginger bollocks.
Barbara: That reminds me I've got some tangerines in the kitchen. Anyone want a tangerine?
Jim: How does your mind work, Barbara?
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Old 03-07-2016, 18:54
FM Lover
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No words needed for the most iconic scene in series 3

Jim and Twiggy stripping the wallpaper and Barb preparing the bacon sarnies in the kitchen.

Just brilliant every time.
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Old 03-07-2016, 19:48
BellaRosa
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Every time...

Jim: Look at that gobshite (Chris Evans)...full of himself. He's like my arse, best kept out of sight.
Denise: He's a millionaire him, Dad.
Jim: Yeah and he's still got ginger bollocks.
Barbara: That reminds me I've got some tangerines in the kitchen. Anyone want a tangerine?
Jim: How does your mind work, Barbara?
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Old 03-07-2016, 22:40
Loz_Fraggle
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Regarding Laurence Llewelyn Bowen

'He lives with a woman, you know', 'Never!'
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Old 03-07-2016, 23:03
SecretLifeoBees
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Jim: I'm going for an Eartha Kitt. Good old Eartha!
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Old 03-07-2016, 23:13
Ollie_h19
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This won't necessarily be 100% accurate. From "The Golden Eggcup" on the way to The Pearl of Prestatyn.

Denise "I can't wait to send Little David a postcard. Dave, will you buy one for me?"
Dave "yeah"
Denise "Mam, will you write it for me?"
Barbara "yeah"
Denise "Dad, will you post it for me me?"
Jim "yeah"
Denise "Ah. He'll be right made up, getting a postcard from me".
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Old 03-07-2016, 23:55
suesuesue
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Thank u Ollie for starting this thread 😀 Hope bbc repeat this show. Yes I know we can dig out the DVDs and watch it but something more enjoyable about watching it on TV and sharing posts.
Easy to forget it was such an innovative comedy format. The public immediately got the lack of studio audience/canned laughter, the long silences, etc. BBC and critics weren't so sure. Pure zeitgeist tv, understanding how the viewer behaved at home. Genius.

I remember being shocked by an interview with Victoria Wood. I always thought she stopped Dinner Ladies because she didn't want to write more but apparently it was because she saw the first episode of the Royle Family and thought "well that's that then, the traditional sitcom is dead" and closed down Dinner Ladies!
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Old 04-07-2016, 11:56
SaturnV
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Substance? I've never even drank ethanol.
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Old 04-07-2016, 12:05
annielou
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"are you having that Dave?"

"He couldn't find his own a$$e with both hands"

"get the door, Anthony"

"It's Beverly Macca's 18th Party tonight"
"Are her kids going?"

"What did you have for your tea"
"Oooh, we've had that"

"Have you seen Valerie's implants, Jim?"

And so many more ....
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Old 04-07-2016, 12:26
Gulftastic
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'I do things to her you wouldn't do to a farm animal..'

Spoken by the mighty John Henshaw. Not sure exactly what it means, but it's always made me chuckle.
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Old 04-07-2016, 13:28
SaturnV
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Horses's arse, horses's arse
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Old 04-07-2016, 13:53
Hugh Jboobs
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Denise: Eeh Mam I meant to tell ya. It turns out Little David hasn't got ADHD after all.

Barbara: Ooh really?

Denise: Yeah. It turns out he just can't be arsed.
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Old 04-07-2016, 14:03
lewiep93
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Denise: Mam will you tell Antony to stop slurping his tea?
Barbara: Antony stop slurping your tea.
Antony: Dave eats like a pig but you never say owt to him.
Denise: He does not eat like a pig, that's asthma thank you very much.

And this one always makes me laugh from my favourite episode, Sunday Lunch:

Nana: Betty buried her husband on Wednesday.
Barbara: Aww.
Nana: When I go, I don't want to be buried I want to be cremated.
Barbara: Ooh Mam!
Jim: Oh just like these roasties!
Nana: Oh I was upset at him going like that.
Barbara: Did you go to the funeral Mam?
Nana: No I weren't invited. They wanted to keep it to those who knew him. That's what upset me. I mean, you don't have to met someone to celebrate their death.
Jim: But you only go to them bloody funerals so you can go to the buffet!
Nana: Ooh I don't wish to speak ill of the dead but he were a tight bugger that Kenneth by all accounts.

Nana turns to Twiggy.

Nana: Do you know? He used to follow round Kwik Save taking everything out of her basket as quick as she put it in! He never let her have Jaffa Cakes only Rich Teas. Bet she'll have Jaffa Cakes now!

I always laugh my head off at this even though there's nothing hugely funny in that sequence. But its the way it was written and the way Liz Smith delivered the lines.
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Old 04-07-2016, 15:41
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Nana when Dave is reading her a story & she say's David whats a little stiffy lol
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Old 04-07-2016, 16:13
Scarlett Berry
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Denise can you have little David on Friday mam?
Barbara yeah to what time?
Denise to Monday.
😊
Follow on from above:

Barbara..yeah
Denise: Yeah me and Dave are having a break?
Barbara: Ohhhh how lovely, where to
Denise: From baby David
Denise: Yeah, Dave needs some alone time...in the Feathers..and I've loads of catching up to do
Dave: Yeah, she's skyplussed loads of Trisha....

Sheer genius. Every thread has made me roar laughing and brought a lump to my throat at the same time. I've been ill and Ironically sky+ the Royle family and have been watching it back...the drunken Dave and Denise arguing over Beverly Macca....just sublime.

The wedding morning, Nana telling Cheryl her bridesmaids dress was "right tight" and Cherly saying that was the style, Anthony and Denise arguing over her room "MAM will you tell him"..

Nana telling David he can run her home to change her shoes, , Denise:MAM will you tell her". All so innocent but beautifully observed and just brilliant.
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Old 04-07-2016, 16:18
MK184
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Mary: They split his ashes. He'd never been out of Salford in all his life, now half of him is in Manchester and the other America.
Norma: Which half went where?
Mary: There's no way of knowing.

Jim (About the TV aerial): Oh for God's sake Dave your useless, if you want something done round here, do it yer' bloody self. Barb, get up there love.

Cheryl: I've got a job interview at Thorntons next week.
Anthony: Oh nice one.
Cheryl: Yeah I think I should do well, I'm friends with one of the girls in there.
Anthony: How do you know her?
Cheryl: I know her from..... From just going in there all the time.
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Old 04-07-2016, 17:11
valkay
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Jim: I'm going for an Eartha Kitt. Good old Eartha!
Eartha Kit,or Tom Tit. The turtle head's popping out.
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Old 04-07-2016, 17:13
lylonic_x
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When Anthony mentions that he's going to manage a band:
"What are they called?"
"Exit. That way, wherever we play, the name is always up in lights"

And noot just one scene or line but I have always loved the episode where Anthony talks about going down to London with Darren to get a record contract. From start to finish it's funny. I also love how, in the episode, Jim suddenly just says (not word for word):
"Yeah, be careful down in London lad. If anyone gives you any trouble, just give us a call and me and Dave will be right down there to sort them out."
Like I said, I just love how Jim completely changes from laughing at the idea of Anthony going London to actually showing how much he cares. Also, to this day I get a lump in my throat with the whole Queen Of Sheba when Nana dies
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Old 04-07-2016, 17:14
eggchen
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My favourite was when Ant'ny's girlfriend is round

Nana : Would you like a ham sandwich Emma?
Emma: No thanks I'm vegetarian
Nana: What is she?
Barbara: A vegetarian
Nana: Oh, thats a shame for you Emma... You could have some wafer-thin ham though, Barbara can't she have some wafer-thin ham?
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Old 04-07-2016, 17:17
lewiep93
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When Anthony mentions that he's going to manage a band:
"What are they called?"
"Exit. That way, wherever we play, the name is always up in lights"

And noot just one scene or line but I have always loved the episode where Anthony talks about going down to London with Darren to get a record contract. From start to finish it's funny. I also love how, in the episode, Jim suddenly just says (not word for word):
"Yeah, be careful down in London lad. If anyone gives you any trouble, just give us a call and me and Dave will be right down there to sort them out."
Like I said, I just love how Jim completely changes from laughing at the idea of Anthony going London to actually showing how much he cares. Also, to this day I get a lump in my throat with the whole Queen Of Sheba when Nana dies
That entire sequence with the death of Nana is heartbreaking. The bit where Barbara screams for Jim when she finds Nana and Jim crying always gets me It'll be 10 years in October since it was first shown.

Another one:
Mary: What were her last words Barbara?
Barbara: Trevor McDonald.
Mary: Ohhhh Barbara! What a fitting tribute to the man.

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Old 04-07-2016, 17:31
eggchen
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The Queen of Sheba was a masterclass in writing I always think. Barbara crying and brushing Nana's hair whilst she sings is pretty moving stuff, and was interspersed with some deft comedy at the same time.

The nature of how our elderly relatives shuffle off this mortal coil, often quietly and without much drama, was perfectly captured in a really superb slice of TV.
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Old 04-07-2016, 17:42
Scarlett Berry
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The Queen of Sheba was a masterclass in writing I always think. Barbara crying and brushing Nana's hair whilst she sings is pretty moving stuff, and was interspersed with some deft comedy at the same time.

The nature of how our elderly relatives shuffle off this mortal coil, often quietly and without much drama, was perfectly captured in a really superb slice of TV.
Couldn't agree more. Que Sera, Sera...

and when Nana (Norma) thanked Barbara....that made me howl
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Old 04-07-2016, 18:42
suesuesue
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Just noticed that Queen of Sheba will be shown Monday 11 July on Yesterday (free view 19) twice at 2110 and 2320. One of the few things on TV that has me in tears, all down to the gentle and very real treatment, Caroline's genius ability and understanding of people in her writing.
Scarlet ribbons for her hair .....
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Old 04-07-2016, 18:52
Ollie_h19
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Just noticed that Queen of Sheba will be shown Monday 11 July on Yesterday (free view 19) twice at 2110 and 2320. One of the few things on TV that has me in tears, all down to the gentle and very real treatment, Caroline's genius ability and understanding of people in her writing.
Scarlet ribbons for her hair .....
Not sure I can bring myself to watch that one yet.
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