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How to find a Girlfriend |
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#51 |
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Forum Member
Join Date: Mar 2003
Posts: 53,623
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Dear god, do you ever let up with that shit ?
Are you incapable of actual human emotion and just giving a person a bit of a gentle positive encouragement ? |
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#52 |
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Forum Member
Join Date: Aug 2011
Posts: 8,717
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Quote:
Can't say I agree with the generalisations being stated about women on this thread. That is the consequence of consistent rejection, it can knock you for six in terms of self worth. You can end up becoming jaded and defensive. At least if such people are going to make such a claim, back it up with hard evidence noting that such things are based on propensity, not everyone is the same and that biology and environment are factors.
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#53 |
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Forum Member
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Gloucestershire, England
Posts: 4,782
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maybe you are trying too hard for that relationship??
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Some people are just not relationship material. There will always be a small percentage of people who will never find a partner or engage in a long term relationship.
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This is why people state that you should live your own life and do the things you enjoy. If you do end up being one of those small number of people, at least you won't regret what you have done in life.
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Can't say I agree with the generalisations being stated about women on this thread. That is the consequence of consistent rejection, it can knock you for six in terms of self worth. You can end up becoming jaded and defensive. At least if such people are going to make such a claim, back it up with hard evidence noting that such things are based on propensity, not everyone is the same and that biology and environment are factors.
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#54 |
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Forum Member
Join Date: Aug 2011
Posts: 8,717
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Quote:
Another guy has already provided the evidence, so it's there for your reading.
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#55 |
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Forum Member
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Gloucestershire, England
Posts: 4,782
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Quote:
Evidence for what?
The evidence I speak of (which was actually posted on a different thread, whilst on similar topic) is this post here: http://forums.digitalspy.co.uk/showp...&postcount=130 |
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#56 |
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Forum Member
Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: Retford
Posts: 20,449
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Quote:
tghe-retford is making the implication that the suggestion about many (not all) women have high and/or above realistic expectations for what they want in a partner as false.
The evidence I speak of (which was actually posted on a different thread, whilst on similar topic) is this post here: http://forums.digitalspy.co.uk/showp...&postcount=130 |
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#57 |
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Forum Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Posts: 5,696
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Quote:
tghe-retford is making the implication that the suggestion about many (not all) women have high and/or above realistic expectations for what they want in a partner as false.
The evidence I speak of (which was actually posted on a different thread, whilst on similar topic) is this post here: http://forums.digitalspy.co.uk/showp...&postcount=130 |
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#58 |
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Forum Member
Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: Planet Earth
Posts: 4,361
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Hello, since creating the thread i have actually found a bit more confidence. I am trying to lose some weight now and trying to build more confidence and look more attractive. What other steps could i take. Im not really into online dating. I Do like traveling and going out places but i just am not sure where to start?
You'd be amazed the places you meet people, without even trying. When you're out and about, smile at people, chat to them when you can and just be friendly. You never know, you may bump into the woman of your dreams in Sainsbury when you are looking for a choloclate muffin or fish fingers! Good luck Sam X |
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#59 |
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Forum Member
Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: Planet Earth
Posts: 4,361
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Just be yourself, don't make out you are someone you are not, be chatty, flirty and most importantly.. Listen to a girl...listen to what they want and dont bore them with me me me
Women like confidence and humour.
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#60 |
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Forum Member
Join Date: Feb 2011
Location: Liverpool/sarf London.
Posts: 11,736
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I'm so glad you've begun to feel more confident about yourself. That is the key to so much in life. Sadly, you will always have some people who will try to knock you down and make you feel bad about yourself. Sod them! As long as you know you are a good person, trying your best to be kind and thoughtful, you'll be fine.
You'd be amazed the places you meet people, without even trying. When you're out and about, smile at people, chat to them when you can and just be friendly. You never know, you may bump into the woman of your dreams in Sainsbury when you are looking for a choloclate muffin or fish fingers! Good luck Sam X Love them |
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#61 |
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Forum Member
Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: Planet Earth
Posts: 4,361
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Or those little cream slices from Tesco...
Love them |
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#62 |
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Forum Member
Join Date: May 2011
Posts: 3,539
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A little bit of an update. I am now going on evening and Morning walks to get some much needed exercise and tomorrow I am going to watch my local team play football. I've decided to live my life and hopefully meet the right person along the way. I can't do much when i'm crying/depressed looking at a computer screen.
Thanks everyone for their advice and I will keep you posted |
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#63 |
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Forum Member
Join Date: Oct 2014
Posts: 697
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That's fantastic news Sam!
A really positive step in the right direction. Take care of yourself, and yes I'd really like to know how you're getting on, so keep us updated xx |
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#64 |
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Forum Member
Join Date: Nov 2015
Posts: 231
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Hi, im 23 years old and nearly 24. I've never had a Girlfriend before or even kissed any girl. It is really getting me down as my Step Bro/Step Sis and Friends have all found people. They have all learnt to drive and i don't seem to find any confidence. I Have autisim and it just seems like no Girl will be ever interested in me. What do i do
![]() Could you not ask a friend who can already drive to take you to an empty carpark or something early hours in the morning/or late evening (when the shops closed) and you could have a few lessons just to ease your nerves and build your confidence. Then when you feel ready you could book a few lessons. I am sure if you explained to the driving instructor beforehand that your really nervous etc.. they will be understanding and support your needs. Truth is when finding a girlfriend or a boyfriend, you really shouldn't go out looking. Most people I know have met their girlfriends/boyfriend/partners by accident.. it just happened. They didn't look for it. I know you might think 'oh i will be waiting forever if i just wait around' but thats not true. You keep busy, have fun and dont think about it and live your life and then when you least expect it she'll turn up. You are 23, you are still very young. There is no rush, honestly. |
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#65 |
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Forum Member
Join Date: Nov 2015
Posts: 231
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Quote:
A little bit of an update. I am now going on evening and Morning walks to get some much needed exercise and tomorrow I am going to watch my local team play football. I've decided to live my life and hopefully meet the right person along the way. I can't do much when i'm crying/depressed looking at a computer screen.
Thanks everyone for their advice and I will keep you posted That's the spirit. It's rare (not impossible though) that you'll meet Mrs Right behind a computer screen. So you're doing the right thing in getting out more. It will happen eventually, just stay positive and let it happen whenever it happens. Good luck, I too would like to hear of your progress,
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#66 |
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Forum Member
Join Date: Feb 2011
Location: Liverpool/sarf London.
Posts: 11,736
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keep us all updated Sam, nice one.
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#67 |
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Forum Member
Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: Planet Earth
Posts: 4,361
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Quote:
A little bit of an update. I am now going on evening and Morning walks to get some much needed exercise and tomorrow I am going to watch my local team play football. I've decided to live my life and hopefully meet the right person along the way. I can't do much when i'm crying/depressed looking at a computer screen.
Thanks everyone for their advice and I will keep you posted Being in a relationship IS lovely, but it's not everything. It can also cause terrible pain if you are with the wrong person. So you at doing the right thing, living your life and just seeing what happens. Be happy and keep us posted. X
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#68 |
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Forum Member
Join Date: May 2011
Posts: 3,539
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Hello all, just thought i would update this page. Well 5 months have passed since i posted and still no girlfriend. I am at college but i have decided as this is my 25th year i am entering i am going to quit college after June and start looking for a job. I have decided that I am going to be losing weight and i am also starting to budget my money to save for the future.
I have set the goal to 2020 which is now only 3 years away to be living independently from my parents, to have found a good job and to hopefully have been on a few dates and who knows maybe in a relationship. |
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#69 |
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Forum Member
Join Date: Apr 2007
Posts: 9,835
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Sam, forwhat its worth I think you're doing the right thing. Yes, tonnes of people have had relationships through meeting on line but for many its not that great.
I think doing more activities and meeting new people is the best way to go. A job will also give you a wider circle of friends and contacts. So much emphasis is put on being part of a couple but having good friends and interests are just as important. |
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#70 |
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Forum Member
Join Date: Jan 2002
Posts: 40,632
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Quote:
Hello all, just thought i would update this page. Well 5 months have passed since i posted and still no girlfriend. I am at college but i have decided as this is my 25th year i am entering i am going to quit college after June and start looking for a job. I have decided that I am going to be losing weight and i am also starting to budget my money to save for the future.
I have set the goal to 2020 which is now only 3 years away to be living independently from my parents, to have found a good job and to hopefully have been on a few dates and who knows maybe in a relationship. A bit off topic, I realise, but higher priorities are like you said. |
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#71 |
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Forum Member
Join Date: Oct 2003
Posts: 351
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It can be difficult I know, all my family members are married and at social events I'm often left out (literally sometimes) just because I'm single.
Perhaps the time is just not right for you OP. Relationships can be rewarding but are also a lot of hassle in my experience and god help you if you get her pregnant ! Enjoy being single while you can is my advice. I'd definitely like to find someone in later life since I think it's comforting to know that there is someone there as things start to go creaky. However even at 43 I think I'd feel a little restricted/ conformist in a long term relationship. |
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#72 |
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Forum Member
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: Crawley, West Sussex
Posts: 9,295
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I know a man who everyone thought was a lifelong bachelor and then at around 50 he met and married the lady of his dreams and nearly 20 years down the line they are still happily together.
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#73 |
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Forum Member
Join Date: May 2004
Location: farnborough
Posts: 1,732
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[quote=jra;85033478]Relationships, getting married and having children is not the be all and end all. For example, one in three marriages end in divorce. And don't feel pressurized to have children if you don't want to. It's not enshrined in law. Some of us simply don't want to get married and/or have children.
A bit off topic, I realise, but higher priorities are like you said.[/QUOTE Given your appalling and well deserved reputation you are the last person he needs advice from. |
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#74 |
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Forum Member
Join Date: Feb 2011
Location: Liverpool/sarf London.
Posts: 11,736
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[quote=terry45;85035825] Quote:
Relationships, getting married and having children is not the be all and end all. For example, one in three marriages end in divorce. And don't feel pressurized to have children if you don't want to. It's not enshrined in law. Some of us simply don't want to get married and/or have children.
A bit off topic, I realise, but higher priorities are like you said.[/QUOTE Given your appalling and well deserved reputation you are the last person he needs advice from. |
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#75 |
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Forum Member
Join Date: May 2004
Location: farnborough
Posts: 1,732
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[quote=gdjman68wasdigi;85036326] Quote:
Hopefully all is going well for Sam. |
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