Like things that tend to happen only in soap actually occurring to you or someone you know.

I had an old soap cliche happen to me today: the doorbell went and my mum thought 'oh your sister probably forgot her key'. Went to the door, only to open it to an old friend I havent seen in about 6 years

I've been in relationships with 2 brothers

I have a sister who is like Ronnie Mitchell.....but without the killing.

Why doesn't that surprise me!

We're you seeing both at the same time?

When somebody said to me

Why are you going home right now

And i said to him it is Family business

Commuting adultery. Never thought I would do it but I couldn't help myself. Thankfully unlike soaps, in real life no one ever finds out.

She steals babies?

One New Year's Eve I dropped my posh American sandwich. I switched it with the local landlady's sandwich. Lots of people complained that my bagel swap was in bad taste.

Were they bald?

Unless I'm around. I have a knack for finding out stuff without even trying.

Was he naked with a spinning bow tie?

On form tonight 0..0

Nope. One of them was very serious. The other was revenge

No but he initially mistook me for some old slapper named Pat

I'm so proud.

LOL no :P It's more the protective attitude to me and my sister....and I'm the oldest, and her cold-hearted approach.

Adultery - I've done that - had two bfs in two countries - England and the Netherlands. I ditched the England lad after a very round the bend relationship after 4.5 years, but was only with the Dutch lad for a year. Before anyone asks, we did meet beforehand - the Dutchie came over to England for Christmas / New Year and we clicked.

Not me, but my sister got pregnant and didn't know who the daddy was. And in true soap fashion, didn't know she was pregnant until a few weeks before giving birth.

I've had arguments with people in the middle of a pub before (and the music stays on IRL not like in soaps where it magically goes off).

I've been cheated on, and when I found out about it I slapped said partner and it was genuinely like a soap scene, all teary and emotional.

My mum had some public showdowns with her siblings a few years ago, got very nasty with slaps, one liners etc.

My life is incredibly dull. But my extended family could have come right out of a soap. Had tons of members come out of the woodwork. Affairs, illegitimate children, prison, suicides etc are all commonplace in my family. Fortunately my parents are the sanest (and that is saying something!)

I was living in a houseshare once and I went out with one of my housemates for a few months. He dumped me and then promptly took up with one of our other housemates who happened to be my best friend. I found out on NYE and we had a big soap style confrontation in our local boozer with me screaming and crying. It definitely felt like a C-list EE NY special. Maybe B-list if I'm being generous. I was pretty dramatic.

It's amazing how much we moan about lack of realism in soaps but they actually are quite on the money

My best friend's ex-wife cheated on him with another one of his friends

One of my cousins was pregnant as a teen and my aunt and uncle didn't realize it til a week before she gave birth, the rest of us found out when she went into labor.

And I had a thing with a closeted married guy...but I think most gay guys have experienced this

I think if you add extended family into the mix with mine, it's like Eastenders.

My aunty had cancer, and a serious operation which very few people have survived. She lives a very bizzare and decadent life. Her house is filthy, she takes in lodgers - usually drug addicts, people from the bingo, even two transvestites - one called Morgan who went under the name Patricia! She leads a double life - has one man at home who her two youngest are from, and sees other men at weekends. She smokes drugs all day long and will talk to anyone about her life. She loves reggae and dancehall - got banned from her youngest's school by blasting very sexual dancehall music - the kids were coming out with it in the class.

Before all this, she was mad. Used to get involved with her neighbours domestic dispustes, left her oldest kids with a nine year old, and some random lesbians she didn't know! Got chased by a man in a halloween mask around where we lived in the tower blocks, knew the local lesbian community and had one live with her....then admitted recently she slept with all of the friends of her oldest kid's Dad who was an alocholic who used to beat her.

I do have an uncle who has had drug issues and has a scizophrenic girlfriend who controls his life.

I have lost a partner to a sudden death - that was nearly two years ago. He was an eplectic who had a fit in the bathroom. Only 32 he was.

I sincerely hope there's no murder confessions