Originally Posted by biomorph04:
“Renee accuses others of being every nightmare that she herself really is”
She's letting him/anyone control her the second she raises her voice & swears & she's handing over power...
I know it's really hard to do at times, but I live my life along the lines that the only real control in life is my reaction, to someone else's actions.
I had a nightmare neighbour for 11 yrs on n off, literally stood there smiling while she falsly accused me of Slagging her off/Kidnapping her cat/waking her kids up all hours/being a paedo (Yes, REALLY) /mental/a junkie etc... She thrived off drama/attention, just like Bear does & shouting/swearing is their language, their fun.
So even though it takes LOADS of self-control, it's worth it. I just used to smile calmly, say "If you have an issue you wanna discuss civily with me, no problem. If you're just going to shout/swear/call me names etc then I'm not gonna get involved in a pointless exchange.
I know it's different cos obviously she wasn't in the same house lol, but as hard as it, it's worth it to see them deflate eventually when they realise they're not gonna get an argument out of you.
She had every right to tell him why she was angry, and tell him what she thinks, but she could've done it in a calm voice, not name-call, and when she said "Done" she should've left it there, instead of then going again a couple more times...that just shows they can draw you back in & you seem weak to them. Sad but true.
Should've said her piece, left it at done, don't talk to me please then literally ignored him if he kept going on. I learnt soooo much self control with 11 yrs of my immature, petty, lying, vindictive, verbally aggressive neighbour &her bfs, if I didn't hate the thought of being on tv I'd love to be in there - I'd tear them a new one without one argument, swear word, or name calling... They're 100 times easier than her lol!!! The calmer you are, the more logical/reasonable you are - the more baffled they get


