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cheating. who's to blame? bear or Chloe?


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Old 19-08-2016, 15:14
seether
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100% Bear, he was the one in a relationship.
Bears fault.
He was attached, she wasn't.
If she knew he was - still 100% Bear?
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Old 19-08-2016, 15:18
Xuri
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If she knew he was - still 100% Bear?
Yes.

I don't see why people have trouble with this. Even if Chloe danced around him naked it was still his choice to cheat.

It would make her a bad person. But the actual cheating is still 100% his fault. Unless you think men aren't responsible for their own actions.

Edit:

I say this, by the way, as someone who really dislikes Chloe.
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Old 19-08-2016, 15:21
Rhumbatugger
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Yes.

I don't see why people have trouble with this. Even if Chloe danced around him naked it was still his choice to cheat.

It would make her a bad person. But the actual cheating is still 100% his fault. Unless you think men aren't responsible for their own actions.

Edit:

I say this, by the way, as someone who really dislikes Chloe.

Spot on. He's responsible for his actions. No one made him do it.

And Chloe wasn't really interested until he went for her, doing kiss dares. It wasn't as if she even tried to 'seduce' him.

I don't like Chloe either.
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Old 19-08-2016, 15:26
seether
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Yes.

I don't see why people have trouble with this. Even if Chloe danced around him naked it was still his choice to cheat.

It would make her a bad person. But the actual cheating is still 100% his fault. Unless you think men aren't responsible for their own actions.

Edit:

I say this, by the way, as someone who really dislikes Chloe.
No I'm not quibbling with his bit of the bad behaviour, just interested how you are evaluating fault. So he is responsible 100% for the cheating in your view & she is 100% responsible for her bad person-ness - 2 separate matters - not necessarily as represented by a % split?
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Old 19-08-2016, 15:29
Xuri
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No I'm not quibbling with his bit of the bad behaviour, just interested how you are evaluating fault. So he is responsible 100% for the cheating in your view & she is 100% responsible for her bad person-ness - 2 separate matters - not necessarily as represented by a % split?
The thread is titled "cheating, who's to blame?".

Bear is 100% responsible for the cheating. He can either say "yes" or "no" to Chloe. Yes means he's cheats, no means he doesn't. The decision is not Chloe's and she's not responsible for the choice he makes.
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Old 19-08-2016, 15:30
NathalieR
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Lol, obviously the person who cheated..
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Old 19-08-2016, 15:36
seether
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The thread is titled "cheating, who's to blame?".

Bear is 100% responsible for the cheating. He can either say "yes" or "no" to Chloe. Yes means he's cheats, no means he doesn't. The decision is not Chloe's and she's not responsible for the choice he makes.
That's not exactly my point. What is Chloe responsible for then - nothing whatsoever? Only interested in how people view her behaviour; many have said she is culpable but less so. If you personally apportion 100% blame to Bear then are you apportioning Chloe 0%? Or just that he is 100% responsible for his part, ie the dictionary-definition cheating.
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Old 19-08-2016, 15:38
Xuri
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That's not exactly my point. What is Chloe responsible for then - nothing whatsoever? Only interested in how people view her behaviour; many have said she is culpable but less so. If you personally apportion 100% blame to Bear then are you apportioning Chloe 0%?
For the cheating, yes, 0%.

As far as I'm aware she didn't cheat on anyone.

This is confusing to me as I really think it's so simple the thread doesn't even need to exist.

Edit:

Oh, to answer your question, she's responsible for her behaviour. Much like Bear is responsible for his. The cheating is his behaviour.
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Old 19-08-2016, 15:40
mccfluff
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if you are in a relationship and you cheat on your partner, then you are in the wrong.
the other person isn't cheating on anyone (assuming they are single in this scenario)
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Old 19-08-2016, 15:44
orangeballoon
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a couple of reality tv people go on a show... and enact a reality tv show....

the only shock is how slutty they actually were.

who was to blame? their parents.
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Old 19-08-2016, 15:45
All_seeing_eye
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He said he was single, he's to blame.
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Old 19-08-2016, 15:46
seether
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For the cheating, yes, 0%.

As far as I'm aware she didn't cheat on anyone.

This is confusing to me as I really think it's so simple the thread doesn't even need to exist.

Edit:

Oh, to answer your question, she's responsible for her behaviour. Much like Bear is responsible for his. The cheating is his behaviour.
^ In that case I understand where you & others are coming from, thanks for explaining - I see why you think it shouldn't need it but I suppose I have a slightly different overview. To me if a married partner is unfaithful then yes he is 100% the unfaithful person as any unattached 3rd party isn't being technically 'unfaithful' (see I get it). But in assessing responsibility of the unattached person, if I have to hold them responsible for their behaviour, I can only assess that by splitting overall blame into % but I understand that some people think that's simplistic & therefore get the wrong impression of what my view is.
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Old 19-08-2016, 15:49
Ms Ann Thrope
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I honestly started to find Bear... bearable. He'd cracked a few giggles from me - and then they threw in the ex and I've now lost complete respect for him.
I don't like Chloe, but I certainly don't blame her.

I honestly think that in that moment, Bear knew that he'd lose a lot of voters which is why he cried in the bathroom - to act like he was sorry. We need to remember what he's admitted - he knows how to play the game! I think if he'd been caught on the outside, we would of seen a much more care free attitude, but because a lot of females are voting him, he knows he's got some making up to do.
He was sorry all right, for HIMSELF. Apparently he had told his girlfriend only the week before he went in that he wanted to spend his life with her. How quickly that seemed to escape his pitiful brain the moment someone else appeared in his sights.

He didn't appreciate being made to look like an arse in front of the other housemates and on live tv, that's why he was crying. Did he care about hurting her feelings? It didn't look like it. He was certainly right that she had a lucky escape, though.

It's all me me me with these scripted reality nitwits. He's like a infant when he hasn't got a script telling him what to do.
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Old 19-08-2016, 15:59
too_much_coffee
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A few years ago I met someone who I started dating and then found out three months later that he was actually married. I felt really bad about the situation and guilty that I had been party to the deception, albeit unwittingly.

Chloe doesn't seem to give a monkeys about it which says a great deal about her, in my opinion.

Bear is just like an alley cat and would have settled for anyone in the right age bracket to have his fun with.
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Old 19-08-2016, 16:43
Littlegreen42
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The one with a partner is the one to blame.
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Old 19-08-2016, 16:44
sorcha_healy27
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I would say it was 50/50. It takes two to tango after all
Bear was the inevitable the girlfriend . 100% him. I said the same about Steph last year. Whoever is in the relationship is fully to blame.
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