Weekly Bulletin of the Malt(shovel)
It was the opening of the new Home Farm adventure activity centre, Given how shambolic it was it will go the same way as the notorious disasters as the Holiday Village and the festival site. Home farm is run really badly in the opinion of the Malt.
Malt customers have been warned to stay away from the main village today due to the wedding of David Metcalf and tracy Shankley, this is likely to be another disaster, and most of the Malt customers have been botcotting Davids shop anyway since the last time tracy was rude to them
Hotten police are being investigated for corruption and incompetance, the Hotton Police clear up rqte is the worst in the Yorkshire region and the Home office want to know why.
Tourist Matt Bianco has been killed in a stampede of Llama's on Farmer Browns big back fied, it is believed that the Tourist 2 dogs were yapping at the heels of the Llama's, Folling this 5 Llama's ran out into the road and were mowed down by a milk lorry.
The Malt in the final match of the season beat the Rose and crown by 10 wickets