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Do you actually know any non-stereotypical gay people? |
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#101 |
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Join Date: Nov 2016
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But when the camp ones all sound the same, their just copying each other not exactly being themselves is it. Another poster in this thread openly admitted to putting on a camp voice and dancing around a bit.
I'm not hating on it and I can see the tide slowly turn and the hate starts to come towards me, I'm just saying that you don't have to be over the top or try to always explain who you are to the point of it being annoying. Its fantastic gay people celebrate their sexuality what with gay pride events etc but I do feel that the camp thing is rather put on and copied by many, hardly you being yourself if you copy others just be yourself. It's something people outside of historically 'minority' or marginalised communities don't understand or want to understand. A sense of identity and community can be fostered in many ways, and it seems odd to me that anyone would say acting in a certain way, because it mirrors other people must mean that it's false in every example or even majority of examples. It's just not true. |
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#102 |
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Join Date: Dec 2004
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I think it is just to do with different personality types - nothing to do with being gay per se. How many loud and bubbly and ultra-extroverted "outrageous" females do you know? I know a few that are completely in your face, although most females I know aren't that way. How many straight men do you know who try so hard to appear masculine? I know a few that put it on a bit, although most men I know aren't that way. It is the same with gays --- I know a few that are camp and "outrageous" and in your face, but I reckon, and the ones that I know personally, most aren't that way.
(I am gay by the way). You should see if there's a gay rugby team in your area, they are getting quite big now. I was in one for a year (last year) and they are often 90% to your satisfaction in terms of "straight-acting" vs. camp acting. |
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#103 |
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Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: Nelson Mandela House- Peckham
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Groups and friends take on each other's mannerisms all the time. Hell, entire communities do; just look at other 'minority' groups like black people, asian, whoever adopting similar dress sense and vocabulary from America or even more locally.
It's something people outside of historically 'minority' or marginalised communities don't understand or want to understand. A sense of identity and community can be fostered in many ways, and it seems odd to me that anyone would say acting in a certain way, because it mirrors other people must mean that it's false in every example or even majority of examples. It's just not true. |
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#104 |
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But when gay people say they are what they are, they are just another clone of the last gay person you saw. What Im saying is, where did this campness come from? was it the "ooh matron" days? and the theme has just sort of carried on? I find it refreshing when you speak to someone who is gay but doesn't make a song and dance about it. Once again this is not me hating on those that do have that way with their personality, I just think sometimes "Ok we get it your gay! don't need to tell us every five mins" or break into song it becomes a bit annoying. I dont go around singing about how I'm straight and love boobs and muff. I dunno it just seems all a bit fake to me, again just my opinion.
But thinking about it, and the people in the pubs I drink in regularly, they do throw their masculinity / heterosexual status in my face every day. I'm not gay, but thinking about it, when they're constantly going on about loving boobs, look her arse, what I'd do to her or what they'd already done with someone; you've just opened my eyes to that hetero version of telling me every five mins that they're straight. |
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#105 |
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It's funny how you ended your post because frankly I do agree with what you say, mainly because you have used such an extreme example of how someone might 'throw' their sexuality in your face.
But thinking about it, and the people in the pubs I drink in regularly, they do throw their masculinity / heterosexual status in my face every day. I'm not gay, but thinking about it, when they're constantly going on about loving boobs, look her arse, what I'd do to her or what they'd already done with someone; you've just opened my eyes to that hetero version of telling me every five mins that they're straight. or announce loudly that I'm straight . There is a difference, the camp over the top gay ones pretty much bang on and on all the time, I think the only time a masculine male says he likes tits and muff is when he's with his mates at the pub.
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#106 |
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True but I dont go to straight parades dressed as a pair of tits
or announce loudly that I'm straight . There is a difference, the camp over the top gay ones pretty much bang on and on all the time, I think the only time a masculine male says he likes tits and muff is when he's with his mates at the pub.It seems more accurate to me to suggest that people of whatever sexuality or orientation will have those who act in a seemingly 'over the top' fashion and will have their detractors for a variety of reasons. |
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#107 |
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Join Date: Sep 2011
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I have known many in Spain (who are gay, but not Broadway musical gay so to speak), but not so many here in the UK. Many of my homosexual friends here perhaps feel they have to act a certain way.
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#108 |
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Join Date: Apr 2010
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But when gay people say they are what they are, they are just another clone of the last gay person you saw. What Im saying is, where did this campness come from? was it the "ooh matron" days? and the theme has just sort of carried on? I find it refreshing when you speak to someone who is gay but doesn't make a song and dance about it. Once again this is not me hating on those that do have that way with their personality, I just think sometimes "Ok we get it your gay! don't need to tell us every five mins" or break into song it becomes a bit annoying. I dont go around singing about how I'm straight and love boobs and muff. I dunno it just seems all a bit fake to me, again just my opinion.
We don't tend to make a song and dance about being gay but many of us will speak up when we are facing abuse or discrimination, or feel like we have to defend our representation on TV and if we show any PDA in public. The problem is, if we show any sign that we may be gay, we are automatically accused of "making a song and dance" or getting "in your face" |
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#109 |
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Join Date: Nov 2016
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I have known many in Spain (who are gay, but not Broadway musical gay so to speak), but not so many here in the UK. Many of my homosexual friends here perhaps feel they have to act a certain way.
Or maybe those people in Spain just happen to be different to those people you know here. In exactly the same way you think perhaps they feel they have to act a certain way, I wonder why it is people feel they have to label behaviour at all? They're acting the way they act. |
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#110 |
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True but I dont go to straight parades dressed as a pair of tits
or announce loudly that I'm straight . There is a difference, the camp over the top gay ones pretty much bang on and on all the time, I think the only time a masculine male says he likes tits and muff is when he's with his mates at the pub.You should hear the guys at my gym talk sex and women in the changing room. It's like a match to see who's the most hetero. |
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#111 |
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You're just after a straight married guy, aren't you..
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#112 |
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You should hear the guys at my gym talk sex and women in the changing room. It's like a match to see who's the most hetero.
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#113 |
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Location: Cork, Ireland.
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The fact that nobody has ever guessed that I was gay would suggest I must be fairly straight acting
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#114 |
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Join Date: Oct 2007
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I have known many in Spain (who are gay, but not Broadway musical gay so to speak), but not so many here in the UK. Many of my homosexual friends here perhaps feel they have to act a certain way.
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#115 |
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Location: Gillingham, Kent
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blokes that go to gyms are not a representive sample, by definition they are trying to prove something, take a survey from pasty, flabby straight blokes
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#116 |
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Join Date: Sep 2011
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Or perhaps those in Spain feel they have to act in a particularly masculine way. The concept of 'Machismo' still has a very strong grip in some Mediterranean countries. Perhaps people here feel that they can act more freely than those in Spain. Don't assume that people who appear masculine aren't also putting on a performance.
I never said my homosexual friends in Spain act masculine. They don't. As I stated, what differentiates them is there is no obvious (intentional or natural) markers that they are gay or not. No flamboyant movements, lisps - or outrageous or scandalous vibe.. and no ultra-masculine over compensation..they are with their boyfriends and friends, just as I am with my wife and friends. I never get the feeling they feel they have to prove anything to anyone. However, I am speaking for Madrid and Barcelona. I am not sure what they get up to in Andalusia or Extremadura for example. Also there are one or two highly provocative and scandalous drag queens on TV with wild makeup and outrageous comments.. just don't see too much of it in every day life. |
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#117 |
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This thread is a hot mess.
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#118 |
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Join Date: Apr 2013
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I do not, but then again, how would I know if they're not flaunting it and it's never been an issue anyway?
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#119 |
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Join Date: Nov 2016
Location: London
Posts: 602
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Quote:
blokes that go to gyms are not a representive sample, by definition they are trying to prove something, take a survey from pasty, flabby straight blokes
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#120 |
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Join Date: Apr 2013
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As I said upthread, go into any pub and you'll hear the same.
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#121 |
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Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: Vault 101, Cheshire
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We have two gay friends. One of them is an old school friend, and if he hadn't come out I'd never have guessed he was gay. No effeminate ways, no attendance at gay parades, no interest in the usual 'gay icons'.
The bloke he lives with is GAY. An attention-seeker, he loves throwing 'Champagne breakfasts' and treating people to a night out at a musical in the West end. He loves watching Bette Davies films and likes 'Kylie'. He's a bit too much for me. |
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#122 |
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Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: North Hampshire
Posts: 5,362
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You had absolutely no suspicions or thoughts before he came out?
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or announce loudly that I'm straight . There is a difference, the camp over the top gay ones pretty much bang on and on all the time, I think the only time a masculine male says he likes tits and muff is when he's with his mates at the pub.
