1: Mirror
2: Signal
3: Manoeuvre
4: Safety Dance

Hazard lights don't mean free parking.

(Just back from the shops and a car stopped at green traffic lights on one of the busiest junctions in town. Hazard lights on, couple faffing around inside. Cars swerving into the bus lane to avoid stopped car. Bloke gets out and wanders off towards shops, car proceeds merrily on it's way. Within the space of about 100yrds, there were a couple of regular parking spots they could have dropped off at. And it was a mini, so BMW drivers..)

Aar could you demonstrate the safety dance please ?

Wearing your elf outfit

Thanks

Drove in night fog for the first time. Visibility was awful! Especially on an unlit dual carriageway.

While your passengers are asleep, pause briefly at the first barrier, then smash through that and the second barrier. As a bonus, you'll be the posthumous top of the pops.

If you see a flock of sheep gathered on the verge outside an open field gate watch out for the sheep dog whipping under your wheels!

Switch on lights (headlights) when it's foggy or nighttime. If you have fog lights, use them in fog.

Buy a car with air con or climate control - stops the glass from misting up in damp British weather, as well as keeping u cool in summer.

With older cars, make sure it has ABS brakes......
Ideally, it should have disc brakes all round, not just on the front.
Traction control is preferable.
If you can, ensure its got electronic stability control (this is quite modern).
All tyres in good condition - important.

Unless u love changing gear all day long, buy an automatic.

Don't buy a diesel car just for going round the road to the shops.

Or have your passenger hold it for you. Yes, that's much better. Consider using a straw too, but only with spirits and not beers or lagers or alcopops.

Buy a foreign car with the wheel on the other side and have a fake wheel attached to the car and when pulled over literally pour out of the car absolutely ratted and fail the drink driving test only for you to then inform the copper that the actual driver is stone cold sober

Just get a Mustang.

A car is merely a means of getting from A to B . It's not a race, it's not a demonstration of any skill known to man , no one will be impressed with death defying near misses. Abide by the Highway Code, don't kill anyone , injure anyone including yourself and don't be a driving tit,.....that's it .

Would love one!

Im not sure, a bit mid life crisis.

Go dogging

When joining a motorway/dual carriageway arrive at the merge driving 5-10mph faster than the traffic on the inside lane. Much easier to adjust and slot in that way, and better for those already on the road you are joining.

the Mustang may struggle in Delamere Forest though.

Sparingly, e.g. if I'm at a give way at the top of a hill and want to be able to move off quickly.

A better trick to learn is not rolling back when releasing the foot brake on a hill (without hill start assist, natch). Not that you should hold on the foot brake for any length of time, especially if there's a car behind you, but still worth knowing all the same.

In my case, it was a herd of cattle. The farmer was driving them along the lane, employing a border collie to perform exactly the same role as a sheepdog would with sheep.

Getting the herd round my car (now stopped with the engine off - I can spot when I'm not going to be able to go anywhere for a good five minutes) proved no problem for the collie. On a couple of occasions, he needed to get from the left hand side of the car to the right hand side, a problem which he easily solved by going over the bonnet.

I was surprised to see that, despite several muddy canine footprints, he hadn't left any scratches.

Try to avoid the things that cause crashes.

For example, if you're overtaking, once you've checked ahead, don't hesitate. Same with entering a junction or roundabout. If you're going - go.

Adjust your driving considerably in ice, fog or heavy rain. Many drivers seem particularly unaware of the dangers of planing in very wet conditions. It's every bit as dodgy as a patch of black ice. Watch the forecast and radio updates re road conditions. Slow right down. No use being on time if you're dead.

Make sure your seat is correctly and comfortably positioned. Keep your two hands on the wheel and ignore all distractions (phones, dogs, children (unless they turn blue)).

Rather than avoiding difficult manoeuvres, like parallel parking, practice them until your depth perception improves and you're completing the manoeuvres confidently.

If you're tired, take a break. If you've had a drink, give someone else your car keys. Give yourself plenty of time to get there.

Finally - I'm surprised at all of these people who recommend automatics. I love using gears. A very satisfying part of driving that makes you feel in control and at one with the car. One of the first things I learned to do was to stop the car without using the brakes - using the gears instead.

Enjoy driving but respect the fact that you're in control of a highly lethal weapon.

There's only one driving tip you need, and it covers everything from lane hogging, bad parking, indicating, using roundabouts, merging on the motorway, fog lights, letting people out at junctions, blocking KEEP CLEAR sections and box junctions, cyclists, pedestrians, making adequate progress... etc etc. It's this...

Ask yourself " Am I driving like an arse? "

If you find other road users are in some way upset with you, then the answer is probably Yes and you need to have a word with yourself.

Just thought of one more; controversial, but anyway. If something runs out in front of you and it's a. not human and b. small enough that an impact won't destroy the car - keep going. Amazing the amount of people who are killed or seriously injured through unnecessarily dramatic evasion of bunny rabbits etc.

I've just thought of a sensible one. If you plan on using motorways you should get breakdown cover.

Don't trust anybody.

It's no concelation, stating from a hospital bed that the cause of the accident was somedody breaking the Highway Code.

Assume that everybody is a moron.

I do that in general, to be fair, not just when driving.

Never assume that other drivers will do what they are supposed to and always be prepared that they will do the opposite.

It sounds like a cliché but it's the single best way of avoiding crashes. Especially when dealing with lane discipline. You start to get a 6th sense of when a car is about to do something stupid.