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Turning 40


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Old 23-12-2016, 20:59
highland paddy
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I'm turning forty soon, wasn't that bothered by it but have been slightly panicking of late. Have nothing planned yet, more worried I might get eaten up by regret that the final, final days of my relative youth are soon to be gone. Have had health problems the last few years which have put a dampener on things anyway.

How do you approach it if you've been there already, or have just thought about it?
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Old 23-12-2016, 21:10
1fab
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Omg, it must be awful to be so old!

Just kidding - you're still young. And age is just a number, after all.
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Old 23-12-2016, 21:11
Phoenix Lazarus
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No big deal, really. Nearly eight years since I was there, and I've got the big four-eight coming, end of February. Still as happy as ever-in fact, more so, with age and experience.
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Old 23-12-2016, 21:19
muggins14
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I still struggle, at 53, to remind myself every day that I'm meant to be a grown up, a middle-aged person, because if I don't remind myself I often forget!

Turning 40 was fine, 41 was the kicker for me (as was 51) because there's no going back then
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Old 23-12-2016, 21:22
JasonWatkins
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It's just a number and another day at the end of the day, but i suppose it's also down to whatever your priorities might be.

For me, it passed by without incident and didn't suddenly make me wistful for that which might have been. Can't even remember what I did on my 40th birthday - most likely went to the cinema on my own.
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Old 23-12-2016, 21:33
Lou Kelly
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.....regret that the final, final days of my relative youth are soon to be gone.
Er, I hate to break it to you but this happened over a decade ago!!
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Old 23-12-2016, 21:38
highland paddy
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Er, I hate to break it to you but this happened over a decade ago!!
I knew someone would pipe up with that as I typed it...what I meant is that it is the unequivocal gateway into middle age. You can argue about being in your thirties as youth or not, hence why I said relative, but in the grand scheme of your life those are your 'young' years. Once 40 and over you can't really be called 'young' anymore.
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Old 23-12-2016, 21:50
Phil Dodd
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As others have said, 40 demographically is no longer a sign of serious middle age. Fifty is well established as the new forty. Probably for you, mid nineties would be your life expectancy based on the "normal distribution curve". For instance, I'm 65 and the average for me is another 19 years. How do we live our full lives and stay healthy ? Exercise our cardiac system every day, consume a healthy diet, avoid things that will kill us and keep an active mind. People in their seventies, eighties and nineties at the sports centre where I worked did several exercise sessions a week such as tennis or indoor bowls, and showed no signs of keeling over. One man 92 was on his third Russian wife.

There is a change in our working lives. We reach a stage where we have progressed as far upwards as we are likely to go, and consolidate our position. This is not all bad because we can take a more relaxed attitude: the pressure is off and we can enjoy our work. Nowadays we are still climbing in our forties and beginning to consolidate by our mid fifties. We are expected to work longer, though, but you could go for a later life career change to an easier job particularly if you have been paying into pensions etc.

The third age is really great ! This is because everyone who follows these forums are the sort of people who will use some of their time for discovery and education - we never stop learning. I've learned so much in the past seven months about subjects that interest me. There is also the opportunity to put something back into society.

So don't worry that he years pass. There is a lot to look forward to if you make the most of each situation. Try to sort out your health problems as soon as you can, though. Good luck and remember that we're always here to chat about your feelings.
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Old 23-12-2016, 22:22
East
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I am 42 and still watch Clubland TV. Being over forty is no big deal for me.
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Old 23-12-2016, 22:36
jp761
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What can you do about it Sweet FA so who cares hey!
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Old 23-12-2016, 22:44
sarahj1986
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I hit 30 this year and it did make me reflect on my 20s a lot, what I've achieved, or not achieved etc etc. Ultimately I was ok with hitting 30, Im a very happily married woman, my career is going in the direction I want it too, and I have a good life with my husband and family.

My 30th birthday itself we were in Mallorca, spent the day at a lovely beach then saw the caves. In the evening we headed into Magaluf for a quick meal then got very drunk and saw the sun rise. My 18th and 21st birthdays were ruined by my ex so I wanted to do the immature thing and go out and get drunk. I was ill the whole of the next day so it's made me realise I can no longer put it away life I used to. I used to love clubbing but now I can't be bothered with the hassle of it anymore and I can't deal with the terrible hangovers.
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Old 23-12-2016, 22:50
hooter
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I still struggle, at 53, to remind myself every day that I'm meant to be a grown up, a middle-aged person, because if I don't remind myself I often forget!

Turning 40 was fine, 41 was the kicker for me (as was 51) because there's no going back then
Go on, you're still a spring chicken
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Old 23-12-2016, 23:15
razorback Tony
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I still struggle, at 53, to remind myself every day that I'm meant to be a grown up, a middle-aged person, because if I don't remind myself I often forget!

Turning 40 was fine, 41 was the kicker for me (as was 51) because there's no going back then
53 here too, but about 31 in my head.
Still have all my own teeth, save for one implant, all my own hair, but with flecks of grey at the sides, just hope that it stays grey and doesn't become white like the teeth.
While I'm at it, I hope the teeth stay white too.
You're right about no going back, it's a shame that you can't press a pause button, then rewind a bit.
Trouble is, the world would be full of 28-34 year olds then.
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Old 23-12-2016, 23:19
1fab
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One of the most youthfully-minded people I know had his 90th birthday this year. I see people half his age who are not half as interesting. You are you, regardless of age.
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Old 23-12-2016, 23:36
Princessxxxx
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I wish I was 40, as I'm in my mid 40's.

The good news, generally the older you are the more wealth you have.

As you grow older, trust me you act more sensibly.

Just look after your self a little bit and when you are 44/45 and you tell people how old you are, they will say, "never, I thought you was in your mid thrities" that will make your day

ATB
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Old 23-12-2016, 23:36
stvn758
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Tell everyone you're 38, will do wonders for your self esteem.
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Old 23-12-2016, 23:38
Fairyprincess0
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Im hoping my life might actually begin at 40.....
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Old 26-12-2016, 22:54
highland paddy
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As others have said, 40 demographically is no longer a sign of serious middle age. Fifty is well established as the new forty. Probably for you, mid nineties would be your life expectancy based on the "normal distribution curve". For instance, I'm 65 and the average for me is another 19 years. How do we live our full lives and stay healthy ? Exercise our cardiac system every day, consume a healthy diet, avoid things that will kill us and keep an active mind. People in their seventies, eighties and nineties at the sports centre where I worked did several exercise sessions a week such as tennis or indoor bowls, and showed no signs of keeling over. One man 92 was on his third Russian wife.

There is a change in our working lives. We reach a stage where we have progressed as far upwards as we are likely to go, and consolidate our position. This is not all bad because we can take a more relaxed attitude: the pressure is off and we can enjoy our work. Nowadays we are still climbing in our forties and beginning to consolidate by our mid fifties. We are expected to work longer, though, but you could go for a later life career change to an easier job particularly if you have been paying into pensions etc.

The third age is really great ! This is because everyone who follows these forums are the sort of people who will use some of their time for discovery and education - we never stop learning. I've learned so much in the past seven months about subjects that interest me. There is also the opportunity to put something back into society.

So don't worry that he years pass. There is a lot to look forward to if you make the most of each situation. Try to sort out your health problems as soon as you can, though. Good luck and remember that we're always here to chat about your feelings.
Thanks for this and other replies.

Anyone else have any advice?
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Old 26-12-2016, 23:28
blueblade
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Tell everyone you're 38, will do wonders for your self esteem.
He is 38 - according to his profile he will turn 40 on 2nd February 2018.

Anyway it's just a number OP. An artificial construct which means sod all.

You are your biological age, not your actual chronological age.
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Old 27-12-2016, 08:17
Walter Neff
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I'm turning forty soon, wasn't that bothered by it but have been slightly panicking of late. Have nothing planned yet, more worried I might get eaten up by regret that the final, final days of my relative youth are soon to be gone. Have had health problems the last few years which have put a dampener on things anyway.

How do you approach it if you've been there already, or have just thought about it?
Just be thankful that you have reached it, I am going to be 80 in May, and I am really looking forward to it.

I will be taking part in my third London Marathon two weeks before, and my best friend is treating me to a Wing Walk for my birthday.

As long as I still have my own teeth then I will never feel old, and if you are fit and healthy, then just remember, it's only a number!
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Old 27-12-2016, 20:00
Sylvester2007
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Been there and nothing changes.

I can imagine if you are single and/or unhappy it may make you start to worry, especially for females with the body clock ticking, but it's a personal thing.
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