'Mysterious double death of sisters found in pool on wedding night'

'Shut the hotel that let 2 drunk women swim down'

I'm sure there's wittier

'Did Muslim immigrants kill 2 English roses?'

Thd sisters, whose house was worth £500,000.......

The article itself would have commented on the price of the wedding dress and have a link to a High Street cheaper version for those at home to get the same 'look'

They'd have to include a supplement once they started digging into their backgrounds.

Mother dies with her sister, 6 years after the tragic death of her son, and a few years after a near fatal new years car crash that put her in a coma

oh it would run for weeks - "motherless child who is the biological child of her aunt's husband" would follow quite quickly then there would be Matthew's tragic death, Penny's tragic accident, Kat and Alfie would be stalked until they gave their story, and they would have a field day with Jack - child with new wife's sister and another with her cousin, husband for the second time of baby swap mother........ then there would be the price of the house in Ongar to research, the price of the house they have just sold - where Ronnie bought her wedding dress and the cost.......

Baby swap mum drowns with sister on wedding day.

It would only be a matter of time before the White family came forward to sell their story, complete with tragic face photos.

Serial Murderer and drug addict drown on New Year's Eve in after hours swimming pool dip at expensive country hotel after forcing all the other guests to flee in order to escape their chavvy Essex wedding.

There would be a no comment from the manager of the hotel over why they left the pool unlocked

Be even more interesting to see headlines on the Sun, given the clever ones they've used in the past
No doubt they would be short, concise, in bad taste but witty

They'd be an article by Katie Hopkins saying they deserved to die for being working class and bigger than a size 8

Their ages would be shown in brackets after their names and 'put on a leggy/busty display' would be worked into the article somewhere.

"Wedding Splashers"

Possible Sun headlines
Sexy sisters sink together
Wed and dead
Drunk Blondes drown after wedding booze up

then after a decent interval say two days, there would be an article in Femail - "is it ever appropriate to wear a black bridesmaid dress or is it a bad omen?" now buy one just like it at ..............

All-grown-up leggy blondes drown in booze-fuelled bender - local house prices set to fall as a result.

LizJones would retrace their steps and get pictured in a wedding dress (size 6 designer) drinking champagne (Bollinger) by the side of the pool

Dead Unlucky!
Sloshed Sisters sink to their deaths
Peroxide blondes in pool disaster
Drunk and sunk
Sexy siblings sink sloshed

Bride and her sister found mysteriously drowned after announcing move from immigrant-filled area!

"Exclusive interview with ginger hunk, Max Branning, who was moments away from showing one of the Mitchell pool death girls his breaststroke on the night of her death"

"Sisters from incest family die in possible suicide pact"

Sister Pact?