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Old 09-07-2002, 02:04
chrissie
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It strikes me Alex has been brought up to have respect for women - he loves them.
He doesnt force himself - he's kind - he's not afraid to show himself with all his faults.
Some men could learn a lot from him.
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Old 09-07-2002, 05:19
Mr Wolf
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Well said! Jonny and PJ are like a couple of little shoolboys compared to Alex.
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Old 09-07-2002, 08:38
Tiggs
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anyone notice last night on C4 when jonny served dinner- alex was the only one to wait for jonny to st down before he started...manners!

T
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Old 09-07-2002, 09:20
Babycatcher
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Originally posted by Tiggs
anyone notice last night on C4 when jonny served dinner- alex was the only one to wait for jonny to st down before he started...manners!

T

Yes, I noticed. Unfortunately I think this display of manners was lost on the rest of the HMs though.
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Old 09-07-2002, 09:44
lulu
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Originally posted by Babycatcher



Yes, I noticed. Unfortunately I think this display of manners was lost on the rest of the HMs though.
Did you notice Alex telling Tim he wouldn't start eating until everyone sat down, and Tim said 'oh I should have waited too'. Obviously not as posh as he thinks! However that isn't posh it's just good manners.

I did notice the rest of them attacked their food the minute they got it, I was quite shocked by how much Jade got in her mouth with one forkful!

lu
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Old 09-07-2002, 09:46
Ed E
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To Tiggs:- Yes, I noticed it too, though not straightaway. At first I just thought he was staring really hard at PJ and wondered why he was giving him the evil eye....I then realised why he'd waited....ah bless. In so many ways, Alex is so out of place in the house, although I don't think Jonny will ever wee in a shower again so I suppose he's achieved a small victory!
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Old 09-07-2002, 09:51
observer
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Originally posted by Ed E
I don't think Jonny will ever wee in a shower again so I suppose he's achieved a small victory!
Not only Jonny, but I am sure many viewers as well! My colleague told me that he will never wee in the shower again *LOL*
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Old 09-07-2002, 09:53
observer
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Originally posted by Tiggs
anyone notice last night on C4 when jonny served dinner- alex was the only one to wait for jonny to st down before he started...manners!
T
Yes, I did notice. Hopefully Alex's maners rub on the rest of the population.
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Old 09-07-2002, 11:12
Gulag Blues
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No, no, no, a thousand times no! It is NOT good manners to wait for people before starting food; this is a fallacy. In fact, it is considered bad manners to let your food go cold, and you should start eating immediately after having been served.

(If you don't believe me, please refer to Debrett's for confirmation).

<edit> However, the HMs' table manners generally leave a lot to be desired. Elbows on the table, slurping, eating with mouth ajar, knife-in-mouth, not wiping their mouths between eating and drinking, etc. Am I anal about table manners? Is the pope Polish?
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Old 09-07-2002, 11:37
mireille
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Originally posted by Gulag Blues
No, no, no, a thousand times no! It is NOT good manners to wait for people before starting food; this is a fallacy. In fact, it is considered bad manners to let your food go cold, and you should start eating immediately after having been served.

(If you don't believe me, please refer to Debrett's for confirmation).

<edit> However, the HMs' table manners generally leave a lot to be desired. Elbows on the table, slurping, eating with mouth ajar, knife-in-mouth, not wiping their mouths between eating and drinking, etc. Am I anal about table manners? Is the pope Polish?
It is v. v. unpolite in france to start eating before eveyone is at the table and served, dunno about english etiquette, but would have thought it to be quite similar....

the other things u have commented on are the same in france. (well not sure about the mouth wiping... a bit "anal?!?!" as you said

Mireille
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Old 09-07-2002, 11:43
Tiggs
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ok- alex waited for jonny because he belives it to be polite to do so.

the others DID NOT dive i because they thought they were being polite!!!!

so whether alex was correct in his understanding of modern table manners or not...he was the only one trying to be polite.

point made

T
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Old 09-07-2002, 11:58
chrissie
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Originally posted by Tiggs
ok- alex waited for jonny because he belives it to be polite to do so.

the others DID NOT dive i because they thought they were being polite!!!!

so whether alex was correct in his understanding of modern table manners or not...he was the only one trying to be polite.

point made

T
again alex showing respect
this time respect to the person who had worked to provide the food - we always used to wait for my mum to sit down before we started dinner - but that was the olden days !!
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Old 09-07-2002, 12:05
mireille
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[quote]Originally posted by chrissie


again alex showing respect
this time respect to the person who had worked to provide the food - we always used to wait for my mum to sit down before we started dinner - but that was the olden days !!
[/QUOTE
am 27, and i will expect my 2 year old to do the same... i think it would be terribly disrespectfull not to...

going back to the etiquette issue, am sorry for showing my ignorance but I was brought up in an not religious environment... I thought that people had to say graces before eating, therefore a tradition would indicate you wait for all to be seated... which I thought would reflect in etiquette....

Mireille...
who cant stand people that make noise when they eating, do not shut their mouth, but dont care about elbows caus was traumatised as a child as to what to do with my hand at the table...
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Old 09-07-2002, 12:16
Lucytash
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Originally posted by Gulag Blues
No, no, no, a thousand times no! It is NOT good manners to wait for people before starting food; this is a fallacy. In fact, it is considered bad manners to let your food go cold, and you should start eating immediately after having been served.

(If you don't believe me, please refer to Debrett's for confirmation).

<edit> However, the HMs' table manners generally leave a lot to be desired. Elbows on the table, slurping, eating with mouth ajar, knife-in-mouth, not wiping their mouths between eating and drinking, etc. Am I anal about table manners? Is the pope Polish?
Alex has been taught table manners by his German mother & Germans are very formal at meal times. The main meal is still a most important part of daily family life.
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Old 09-07-2002, 12:19
Gulag Blues
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Originally posted by mireille


It is v. v. unpolite in france to start eating before eveyone is at the table and served, dunno about english etiquette, but would have thought it to be quite similar....

the other things u have commented on are the same in france. (well not sure about the mouth wiping... a bit "anal?!?!" as you said

Mireille
My understanding is that this depends to a certain extent on the number of people at the table. If you have to wait over 10 minutes for everyone to be served before eating, your food goes cold and you are therefore encouraged to start scoffing (and cold caré d'agneau avec sa timbale de pommes de terre au fromage de chèvre just doesn't do the trick, I'm afraid).

For the record, I was brought up with a Mauritian variant of good Catholic French table manners...
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Old 09-07-2002, 12:22
Babycatcher
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Originally posted by mireille


It is v. v. unpolite in france to start eating before eveyone is at the table and served, dunno about english etiquette, but would have thought it to be quite similar....

the other things u have commented on are the same in france. (well not sure about the mouth wiping... a bit "anal?!?!" as you said

Mireille
It is also considered rude in Germany to eat before everyone is served. Alex will have been taught that by his German mother, as was I (mine being from aristocracy, albeit lowest rank)

I would have thought that eating before everyone was settled was a matter for the host to "give permission" for them to do so.
"Please start before the food goes cold...." or whatever. In this case Jonny would be the host as he was the one who did the cooking.

Trouble is with manners is that each country has it's own ideas on what is considered to be polite so confusion and offence reign!!
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Old 09-07-2002, 12:24
mireille
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Originally posted by Gulag Blues


My understanding is that this depends to a certain extent on the number of people at the table. If you have to wait over 10 minutes for everyone to be served before eating, your food goes cold and you are therefore encouraged to start scoffing (and cold caré d'agneau avec sa timbale de pommes de terre au fromage de chèvre just doesn't do the trick, I'm afraid).

For the record, I was brought up with a Mauritian variant of good Catholic French table manners...
Agreed, at large familly reunion we do eat before everyone is served but only once the host has invited you to.
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Old 09-07-2002, 12:27
Gulag Blues
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[quote]Originally posted by mireille
[b]
Originally posted by chrissie


going back to the etiquette issue, am sorry for showing my ignorance but I was brought up in an not religious environment... I thought that people had to say graces before eating, therefore a tradition would indicate you wait for all to be seated... which I thought would reflect in etiquette....

Mireille...
who cant stand people that make noise when they eating, do not shut their mouth, but dont care about elbows caus was traumatised as a child as to what to do with my hand at the table...
(God, I've opened a can of worms here...) Grace at formal dinners is said before food is served (God knows what it is in private homes). As I said, the crucial point is that the food should still be warm when you start eating it; I would imagine that in a draughty, poorly built and uninsulated English country house, you'd have to start eating PDQ before your food started congealing on the plate.

The English and the French have markedly different attitudes to hands: in France, hands have to be on the table, whereas in the UK, hands under the table is fine (this is allegedly to avoid young demoiselles being molested at the table; obviously not a problem for the Rosbifs...).

(On-topic): I agree that Alex was acting through politeness whereas all the others could think of was munching, slurping and generally being unappetising before Jonny had had the time to start eating himself. However, I just wanted to point out some of the lesser-known aspects of "correct" (whatever that means) manners... And look where it's got me!
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Old 09-07-2002, 12:28
chrissie
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Originally posted by mireille


Agreed, at large familly reunion we do eat before everyone is served but only once the host has invited you to.

Exactly Mireille

Chrissie
loves old fashioned table manners
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Old 09-07-2002, 12:31
mireille
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yes table manners differ from country to country, but generally within europe they are quite constant, and fairly based on commun sense. It is not nice to start eating when the person that went to the trouble of cooking for you is still in the kitchen... if someone spend 1 hr cooking for you you can wait 5 min. for them to make their way to the table... cant be that hungry.

it's not pleasant to see into people's mouth when full of food, it's not pleasant to hear noises either...

so I agree with what Alex has done, he though will be made to appear "pedantic/up tight" (appologising for spelling, and not even sure this is the right word!!) by most people, which is highly unfair
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Old 09-07-2002, 12:36
snowfire
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Babycatcher did I read that correctly?

Are you a toff?

Wow - <curtsies> just as well I agree with most of your posts or it could have been off with my head

Snowfire
Appropriately subservient
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Old 09-07-2002, 16:00
peppie
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If... I have cooked a meal for my family and they start eating it before I've sat down it drives me mad!
No one is that starving that they cant wait for a minute for everyone to be together! a meal is alot more than the food on your plate, it's a social experience and a chance for everyone to get together for a short while. also bad manners is leaving the table before everyones finnished!

Thank you

Sharon
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Old 09-07-2002, 16:03
KimWim
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Even though I believe Alex was right in waiting for everyone to be seated. Why didn't he remind the others and tell them to wait instead of sitting there scowling. I think he would have made more of an impact by that.
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Old 09-07-2002, 16:07
cazkins
 
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Originally posted by peppie
If... I have cooked a meal for my family and they start eating it before I've sat down it drives me mad!
No one is that starving that they cant wait for a minute for everyone to be together! a meal is alot more than the food on your plate, it's a social experience and a chance for everyone to get together for a short while. also bad manners is leaving the table before everyones finnished!

Thank you

Sharon
I agree 100% with what you said Sharon. Respect to Alex for his table manners but I'm afraid I still don't like him much!
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Old 09-07-2002, 16:11
lulu
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Originally posted by KimWim
Even though I believe Alex was right in waiting for everyone to be seated. Why didn't he remind the others and tell them to wait instead of sitting there scowling. I think he would have made more of an impact by that.
That lot would probably wonder what he was going on about

lu
*also believes it's good manners to ask to be excused from the table*
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