Fine I'll carry on then shall I? just don't want to see this go to waste!!!

... She crept up on Mr Ian Tumnus Waite
"Hello," she smiled, practically drooling right in front of him.
Mr Ian Tumnus Waite glanced around. No one was there to help him, as they'd all danced into the sunset with Asantonlan.
"I just heard," said Mad White Witch Arlene, her hand running suggestively up her stockinged leg,"if you would like to be my partner for the Great Dance Ball at the Ice Ballroom."
Mr Ian Tumnus Waite was trying very hard to think of a get out clause.
"Umm if I don't your Majesty, what may I ask will happen to me?" he said hesitantly, his heart beating manicallyagainst his enchanting chest.
"Umm the worst punishment I can think of!!" she said a horrible glint in her eye. He knew what she wanted; him to thrust him hips and be raunchy!!!
"NEVER!!!!" he yelled but Mad White Witch Arlene glared at him menacingly.
".. would I turn down the chance to dance with you!! May I call you Arlene??" he said stuttering.
"Why of course you can Ian. Now let us get back to my castle and begin training!!" And with that the carriage whooshed away, as Mr Ian Tumnus Waite looked back over his shoulder, he saw the sparkles running up behind. Unfortunately they were too late.
Lilia was beside herself "Oh Mr Ian Tumnus Waite!" she cried,"How on earth will we get you back?" ..........

Help required!!!

i went to see narnia tonight and all i could think about was this bloomin version. when aslan died i actually cried out loud "oh no, they killed anton". i got a few odd looks i can tell you. also i noticed that the old version of either lucy or susan is played by a miss winkleman!

oops didnt mean to cause embarrassment in the cinema, tho expect I'll do the same when I see it

Right said Lillia Sparkle the dance contest to save the land of Strictly Narnia cannot go ahead without Mr Ian Tumnus Waite, we need that chest, we need those legs, we need that smile, we need spanked .........ooops sorry not old enough to be thinking such things apologised Lillia, just blame the Ian & Zoe appreciation thread for that last bit
So we must go back to the Palace and save him from the evil clutches of the Mad White Witch Arlene, come on everyone lets go. They rushed off madly towards the palace and it was only when they reached the secret door again that they realised they didnt have a plan, wait said Darren Sparkle, I have an idea, Brendan it is time to find the good in your heart and sacrifice yourself for the greater good, you must go in there and offer yourself as a worthy replacement for Mr Ian Tumnus Waite.
Will there be ladies said Brendan wickedly, yes yes said Darren now get going. Brendan went through the door and they waited breathlessly for what seemed like hours to see if Mr I tumnus would come back to them.
Eventually just as they thought all hope is gone, Mr I T arrived breathlessly through the door way and flopped on the ground at their feet. Poor Mr Tumnus whatever did she do to you said Lillia soothingly as she laid his head on her lap.
Mr I T said voice wavering, she made me samba for her alone in that great icy ballroom, then Tango then Rumba, it was all too much for me, just as your Brave brother Brendan arrived she was trying to get me to spank her, thank you so much for saving me.
Oh you poor, poor man lets get out of here before she finds out.
Later, much later, they are back at the outdoor ice ballroom,
taking their places for Strictly Ice Dance the competition to end all competitions and to win back Narnia for its peoples and creatures.

And here's our Compere, Brucie Stag Forsyth, and his able assistant, Tess Fawn Daily. He opens the show with his usual well known phrase:

Ice to see you to see you ICE shouted back everyone, and now lets meet the Ice Stars of our show:

Mr Ian Tumnus Waite and his beautiful partner Lillia Sparkle,
Mr Antaslan Du Beke and his beautiful partner Zoe Sparkle, (Im ashamed I cant remember).
And Miss Karen Hardy and her partner Darren Bennett Sparkle,

Will everyone please take their places for the The Narnian Smooth Marathon, how long can they keep going, who'll be knocked out, who'll get to the next dance "The Narnian Avocado Tango" ...............

Bravely they take to the floor and begin to dance for their lives, wonderful to watch as the American smooth is danced all around, only two couples will make it to the next round, time ticks on two hours pass and still they dance, three hours, four hours, four and half and then there are signs of flagging, Camilla Sparkle and her partner are exhausted, strain shows as they try to continue the dance, unbeknownst to anyone the evil White Witch Arlene is watching from a safe distance and has bewitched some of the dancers to try and prevent the dance battle being won.

Suddenly the first dance is all over, Brucie, announces, ladies, animals and gentlemen, the first round is over, give a huge round of applause to Darren Bennett Sparkle for doing a great job and of course a huge round of applause to those who move to the next round. Miss Lillia Sparkle and her partner Ian Tumnus Waite, and Antaslan Du Beke and his partner Zoe Sparkle.

A short break is now had by all and as we wait for the next and final round there is evil afoot in the forest, Arlene the Evil witch is re-charging her wand in order to destroy the plans of the dancers for the re-establishment of Narnia to Narnian hands. She unplugs the re-charger and raises her wand, but is stopped by a gentle hand on her shoulder and the suave voice of Antaslanton, Arlene my dear its time to let it go, you've had your fun now lets let the rightful owners of Narnia have it restored to them. Brendan Sparkle is waiting for you in your Ballroom to give you the dance of your live, go child how can you refuse. Pained for a moment she looks at Antaslanton in desperation and then turns quietly on her heel and flees back to the ice palace.

Now it is time for the final round, contestants take your places for the Narnian Avocado Tango, now dance, dance for your very lives depend upon it.

And so Lillia Sparkle and Ian Tumnus Waite took to the floor followed by Darren Bennett Sparkle and Karen Hardy and they danced up a storm, there was fire, there was sexiness, there was heat, there were avocado moves such as have never been seen on a dance floor, and then there was silence as......................