Bill: Put that paddle down, put it down!!!
Craig: 2!

Bill shows Craig his botafogos. Craig screams and falls down in a dead faint.

Brucie stands with Bill. Suddenly, Laurie Holloway runs in, ready for attention.

Brucie: Craig Strasse has been shot. (A beat) Round up the orchestra and bring a few trumpets!

Laurie scurries off.

Um, I can do better ...

Well, it's still better than me, because I can't think of anything at all.

Well my Dad has thought about the above....

Very difficult to do the usual suspects line as in the original, Strasser's dead and sadly I couldn't kill Craig, so it's not really relevant.

But how about....when he's fainted onto the floor the producer comes mincing out, says something like, 'Craig Strasser is dead, send for Will of Casualty'. Will comes on and gives Craig the kiss of life.

The Baftas been and gone and no script nomination...

No mention for the Oscars either.

But by popular demand (yes, really) and for the benefit of FM's who weren't around this time last year...I present a little effort starring Bill and Karen and all the usual suspects of SCD.

Enjoy.

It would have been last year that you would have got nominated not this year

I was referring to my scripts THIS year.

Overlooked both years...not good enough.

Nancy...I was overlooked as well. Perhaps they got our addresses wrong?

Thanks for reviving these for us. Glad I got to read them at long last! Good stuff

They must have.

Had my dress all ready as well.

Glad you like them. Greatly enjoyed yours as well.

Perhaps we'll have to give a statuette to each other.

There's an offer I don't get every day!

Your lucky day.