Although it wasn't a line, it cracks me up whenever they show Matt spoon feeding David, and David then taking the rice out of his mouth and throwing it to the floor.

Edit: I know I've already posted, but that really does crease me up everytime I see it!
Last edited by *Laura* : 24-11-2006 at 13:59

I fully laughed oout loud at that one, class




Any of David's stories where the person dies is brilliant


Ant & Dec (especially Dec) have been quality as usual. Also, the 'Jan fan fan' thing had me in stitches.

i was crying with laughter when ant and dec were taking the mick out of vaginaca...went something along the lines of:
dec 'i know a girl called abi birthday'
ant 'no you do not...thats not a real name'
dec 'it is'
ant 'it isn't'
dec 'is'
ant 'ring her then'
dec 'i can't'
ant 'why not'
dec '......................she died'
then when ant was reading the autocue dec said 'she burnt to death on her candles'

loved it!

I love David's Vaginica Semen stories.

Scott after 1 song in his BTT "I'm a celebrity, get me out of here NOW"...

Sorry, the man's such a ****.

Anything where those two get the giggles is the best!

Also love Ant and Dec's faces whenever Scott goes, 'I'm a celebrity get me out of here!'
'WHAT?'
'Seriously?'

But my favourite was when Dean screamed so loudly on his BTT that Ant yelled too, and then he went...
"I nearly died!" LOL!

The one from Phina about Gaffneys ego and him being unemployed..

<weep> <sob> <woe is lil ole me>


no quote

"What charity do you support David?"
"Chinese girls with Herpes".......etc
I nearly choked I laughed so much

I agree with this one..He said with such a dead pan face too..some of them still take a while to wonder if he is serious.

Who would have thought this man would be so funny before he went in?..all the stories in the press about him asking for personal assistants etc,he doesnt seem at all like that..he is the funniest to watch by far.

Thank God that wimp left last night..the trick he pulled on sitting on the chest was more childish than anything I have seen any of my children or their friends do..he should feel embarassed.

[quote=shirlt9]I agree with this one..He said with such a dead pan face too..some of them still take a while to wonder if he is serious.

Who would have thought this man would be so funny before he went in?..all the stories in the press about him asking for personal assistants etc,he doesnt seem at all like that..he is the funniest to watch by far.

He probably did say all those things about the assistant and ailments, but was so deadpan the press believed him

Brilliant - and his timing is spot on.

[quote=Melodybear]
I'm starting to think that most of the storiees we've heard about gest are just jokes he told that get reported as fact. Theres some US sites that are doing the same thing with quotes from IAC

Absolutely, and so dead pan.

"Anus! Anus!" (Jan Leeming back in teh camp after the Bushtucker trial)

The CGWH didnt really make laugh that much really

ant and dec to have there moments, when you can tell that it isnt too scripted

"Wake up, stretch, and bitch, 2, 3, 4..."

I found it so funny when Malandra was talking to the camera (I think she was in the tree house) and she said "Oh, there's a rat over there" and David came into view with black whiskers drawn on his face, and said, with a great big beam "It's me!"

Cheers! I've just spat my drink all over my keyboard

"Chinese girls with Herpes".

Fantasically deadpan!

Tc

Ok, so I know I've posted here before (several times) but was it just me who found Matt last night blo*dy hilarious?
Matt: "Myleene says 'That's an amazing idea'
<cut to clip of Myleene saying 'That's a genius idea'>
Matt: "Normally it's a really sh*t idea, but according to Myleene it's an amazing idea!"
Matty to win

Matt (to David on David's fake chat show): I don't think David actually snores, I think he just wants people to think about him while he's asleep.

I know it was in questionable taste but I was absolutely PMSL when David was talking about "Albino Heights"
He is sooooo funny.
He has had such a bad press makes you wonder what Jacko is really like doesn't it? Perhaps ITV could sign him up for the next series.

You really can't get much better.

I only tune in for Gest

Jan
"He said, if I was older would you marry me? I said, No!"