THE BOSS: “So, what’s going on then with those three people who flew out of the Rift?”

JACK: “Well, one got a job in London. Despite her only being in this new time for about a week or so and being a little naive about sex, we fully expect her to be able to cope in the Capital City, while avoid getting mugged, stabbed, raped or getting taken advantage of in the various nightclubs. Assuming she survives her first two weeks in London, she’ll fit right in and benefit the human race by opening a fashion store.”

THE BOSS: “Ooookaayyy. What about that hot pilot?”

JACK: “Owen banged her into the middle of next week. As you know Sir, that’s standard protocol for Torchwood personnel when we encounter aliens or humans who are misplaced in time, or possessed. Despite the fact that we told the pilot that she couldn’t go back, she made us look like stupid fools by predicating the precise moment when the Rift could take her back. She’s clever, that one. Whatever time she files into, she’ll fit right in.”

THE BOSS: “I see…..and the Old Guy?”

JACK: “He wanted to die. I let him.”

Pause

THE BOSS: “And you guys think you deserve better office space because?!??”

Pause

JACK: “Erm…..the future is coming and we’ve got to be ready?”

THE BOSS (sighs): “You should be ready, Jack. Something is coming. Out of the darkness. Its coming for you, Jack.”

JACK: “What is it?”

THE BOSS: “Your P45. You’re fired.”


Last edited by SkyBlueArmy : 18-12-2006 at 21:26

Nice

If it was a one man operation with sidekicks you could overlook or the questionable actions but there is another level of command and beauocracy, perhaps we'll see the consequences bite T3 in the ass at some point.

True.

They need a boss. At the moment, they're getting away with murder (especially Jack) and shagging aliens.

I mean, Jack is a man who is dead and in a way, wants to die - I'm not sure if I would want someone like that working with me in a organization like Torchwood.

Hell, under Jack's watch:

>>> Team members have taken home alien tech.

>>> Team members are banging other team members (Jack & Ianto, Gwen & Owen)

>>> One team member went wacko and attempted to kill other team members - twice! (Suzie)

>>> Demon fairys took a little girl away to join their clan.

>>> One team member hid away his Cyber-woman girlfriend in the basement for Christ knows how long.

>>> Another team member met an alien chick, shagged her, and then brought her new girlfriend into the very heart of Torchwood HQ.

>>> The entire team got locked into their own HQ and had to rely on the piss-taking local police to get them out.

Who is keeping a record of all these screw-ups?

Of course, they can't be perfect because that would result in a very boring show and no Season 2 - but someone, somewhere, in the Torchwood-verse MUST be keeping a record of all these screw-ups that Team Cardiff are making under Jack's leadership.

Maybe TW3 has done some good things under Jack's leadership that we haven't seen. TW1 was supposed to be the big cheese and what did it do. Only build a skyscraper to reach a spatial disturbance - probably taking money from the other TW's. Once the sphere came through, fired particle guns at the spot and saw "ghosts" kept doing it, not realising it could hurt Earth rather than help it and then of course, when the cybermen and daleks came out. They didn't have the tech do deal with them. Let 4 Daleks break a million Daleks out of prison and allow war on Earth. Basically letting Earth become home of the Daleks. TW as an organisation is bit rubbish but then what do you expect from something which was set up by the Queen.

I dunno if TW1 'let' the Daleks do anything - they were being 'deleted' by the Cybermen at the time.

The threats which TW3 have faced have been pretty minor compared to the battle of Canary Wharf, and all too often, self inflicted.

TW1 couldn't do much about the Daleks sending their Void ship and the Cybermen following it.

TW3 could do something about their own team members taking home alien tech.

They should never have killed off Yvonne Hartman. She would have given CJ a run for his money in the ego stakes.

Yep, I liked her.

Is there any evidence that she is dead?

I'm sure with a spot of cloning & a touch of Cyber brain transplant they could get Yvonne up, running & pissed off as hell

that would be a turn up for the books.

But given what we know about Yvonne would it be unexpected - after all this was a woman who stayed true despite being Cyberised - surely avoiding being drawn into the void would be easy for her - after all 7 of 9 - sorry Ianto's robogirl managed to do it.

just wish she hadn't be cyber-ised and left as she was...truly brilliant character that could have returned in the same way Harriet Jones is a reoccuring role.

As she was processed on this Earth, their could be a chance she wasn't sucked into the void. She could still be walking around TW1, and really p****d off by now.

I agree, it seems wrong that Torchwood is effectively Jack's organisation.

What's more odd is that there's none of the jingoism that pervaded Torchwood on Doctor Who. None of the "for the good of the empire" stuff, now all of a sudden it's about the whole human race - to the extent that somebody put an American in charge. I can't help but figure that they need to do an episode that connects what we're seeing to the established history of Torchwood, and the sooner they tackle Jack's backstory the better because it seems like the show needs to be able to move beyond that mystery.

Jack's doing it for the Humans Race but perhaps Torchwood thinks he's doing it for the Empire.

It seems to me that we learn more about Jack on the website than we do in the show. Did you see that journal that somebody posted on one of the TW threads.

But Lisa (being one of the last Converts) would have been upgraded with materials from WhoEarth so would not have been sucked back.

There were others like this but they died soon after.


http://www.torchwood.org.uk/html/fall/report.shtml

Presumably because Ianto was there on the spot and manged to act quickly enough he managed to stabilise Lisa unlike the other partial conversions who would have been left alone for some time before they could be helped.

How I wish that Yvonne had been one of the last converts, when they were frantically sticking whole bodies in cybersuits rather than just brains, we could have had the very pleasing sight of *her* in the metal cyber-bikini...

Jack is in real trouble in the season finale when the health and safety people turn up for an inspection. I wonder how long it is since they had all their plugs PAT tested?

Terrible signage down there in their secret base as well, and I saw more than a few heavy items stored high up. Tut tut.

Look this is YVONNE HARTMAN we are talking about, if anyone could survive losing bits of her she could and why should we assume that Torchwood reports are accurate.

Torchwood needs someone to kick butt in Cardiff, so why not bring back Yvonne

And I bet they still don't give the police any respect!!

What is Torchwood in Cardiff isn't *really* Torchwood? Afterall, they've got one reject from London (Ianto), and a few guys they've picked up from the surrounding area. Jack seems to have been working there before the others. Perhap's he's just told them they're working for Torchwood. The sod.

I hate to break the terrible news to you but Torchwood isn't "real". It's a work of fiction.

sorry to go off subject, but in episode 1 did Jack say they had lost TW4?

Yup - cue Babylon 4

The Torchwood station up in Glasgow, run by a strange Scottish bloke...... 7th Doctor????