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Old 06-02-2007, 22:05
stfrench
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Originally Posted by SlinkyMalinky
I know the programme makers are slanting it to make the parents look as pushy as possible (not difficult!) I want to take the children away from their parents and give them to the SCD pros - they'd be much more supportive and effective teachers! Poor little Ellie - a beautiful dancer, with all the personality and character knocked out of her by her charmless parents. Praps her mum fancies a bit of dancing to shift her stomach. Ooo, miaow!
Hear! Hear! The kids were nice dancers but it's the parents I'm appalled at!
Talk about pushy! It might be all clever editing but I strongly felt the parents were living vicariously through the kids and the poor kids didn't have much say in what was happening to them (esp in Ellie's case).
That wasn't nice viewing (apart from some of the kids' lovely dancing).
xx
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Old 06-02-2007, 22:11
Lovely Leitrim
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Originally Posted by thismouse
Hear, hear. These parents are making my skin crawl
At least Mason's dad wanted the best for his son, in that, if his son was happy, then he was happy.

As for Ellie's parents...
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Old 06-02-2007, 22:14
Mel G
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Can someone please tell me if all the make-up, fake tan, etc. is really necessary? Are they judged on it? If I was a judge I'd take marks off for every false nail on the under 12s, every fake tan, and for every parent that shouts as if they are at a football match.
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Old 06-02-2007, 22:17
dippydozy
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Originally Posted by Mel G
and for every parent that shouts as if they are at a football match.
You noticed too!

That girl at the end who said she doesn't feel 10 - well certainly doesn't look it, she looked tired and fed up
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Old 06-02-2007, 22:18
Coronis
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The shouting really hacked me off... *snorts* Twas real classy.... I imagine that would just put them off, make them more nervous, etc.
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Old 06-02-2007, 22:21
Mel G
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Originally Posted by Coronis
The shouting really hacked me off... *snorts* Twas real classy.... I imagine that would just put them off, make them more nervous, etc.

Especially as Ellie's mum hardly looked as if she could dance for more than two minutes without stopping for a doughnut, yet felt qualified to shout at her daughter for not putting enough effort in!
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Old 06-02-2007, 22:22
Inner Self
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Originally Posted by Mel G
After watching this programme, I know that I will NEVER let my daughter compete on the circuit. Dancing for fun, yes - but these kids didn't look like they were having fun at all!!!!!!!!!!

Just watched SBB and the parents especially Ellie's were appalling

They were living their lives completely through their children and I found Ellie's father a rather unsavoury character.

The mother of the two children was the only one who seemed just a little balanced and she was obsessed with glamour!!
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Old 06-02-2007, 22:27
AnnieD1981
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I used to think some of the skating parents I'd seen were bad but they were nothing on Ellie's parents. That poor child seemed to take absolutely no joy from dancing whatsoever, and I'd hazard a guess that it was entirely down to her parents' attitudes. Imagine having such a wonderfully talented child and yet being so negative towards her!

I also wasn't impressed with the mother of the brother and sister. I didn't think she was too bad apart from spending too much money and liking dancing for the sole reason of getting to dress her daughter up like a doll. But then she made the comment to her son about the other children at the competition being c**p and tried to change his attitude from thinking "Never mind we didn't win, there's always next time," to thinking that he was robbed. I'm not saying that every child should learn to take a skill to a competitive level, but I believe that one of the values that it has is to teach children that the most important thing is to do your best, and that yes sometimes there will be people in life who will be better at something than you. You have to suck it up, say well done and be happy that you did your best.

On the good side I thought Tabitha's mum still seemed to have a reasonable grip on reality and her comment to her daughter after they were knocked out that she'd done really well for only two months work and was so proud of her seemed only to magnify the other parents' behaviour. I also have to say that I found her partner an absolute scream, especially when he was explaining his theory of facial expressions! Now there's a kid MADE for performing!
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Old 06-02-2007, 22:27
Reality Sucks
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Originally Posted by Mel G
Especially as Ellie's mum hardly looked as if she could dance for more than two minutes without stopping for a doughnut, yet felt qualified to shout at her daughter for not putting enough effort in!

Those were my thoughts exactly - It was a case of "Don't do as I do, do as I tell you!" Those two, Ellie's parents, were as bad as each other. Hideous, hideous people who appeared to look upon their daughter as their pension fund
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Old 06-02-2007, 22:33
Reality Sucks
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Originally Posted by AnnieD1981
I used to think some of the skating parents I'd seen were bad but they were nothing on Ellie's parents. That poor child seemed to take absolutely no joy from dancing whatsoever, and I'd hazard a guess that it was entirely down to her parents' attitudes. Imagine having such a wonderfully talented child and yet being so negative towards her!

I also wasn't impressed with the mother of the brother and sister. I didn't think she was too bad apart from spending too much money and liking dancing for the sole reason of getting to dress her daughter up like a doll. But then she made the comment to her son about the other children at the competition being c**p and tried to change his attitude from thinking "Never mind we didn't win, there's always next time," to thinking that he was robbed. I'm not saying that every child should learn to take a skill to a competitive level, but I believe that one of the values that it has is to teach children that the most important thing is to do your best, and that yes sometimes there will be people in life who will be better at something than you. You have to suck it up, say well done and be happy that you did your best.

On the good side I thought Tabitha's mum still seemed to have a reasonable grip on reality and her comment to her daughter after they were knocked out that she'd done really well for only two months work and was so proud of her seemed only to magnify the other parents' behaviour. I also have to say that I found her partner an absolute scream, especially when he was explaining his theory of facial expressions! Now there's a kid MADE for performing!
Yes, they definitely showed a more human side and Mason dropped out when he realised he wasn't having fun any more. I couldn't help thinking of Ray from the X Factor who used to do ballroom dancing. Mason had a similar sort of personality. I didn't get the feeling that they pushed him into it, it was something he wanted to do.

I agree with you about the other parents - Perfect examples of how not to bring children up. I felt for the children, they were being emotionally blackmailed on all sides.
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Old 06-02-2007, 22:38
china doll
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I'm afraid I found it very disturbing, surely they should be allowed to be children first, and dancer's second. As for the pushy parents, I thought Ellie's mom should be the one doing the dancing, as she's the one that needs to lose some weight. If the children had looked even slightly happy with what they were doing, I would've felt more comfortable with the whole thing.

Had to admire Mason giving it up as he did, because he was missing the things that "normal" children do.

Last edited by china doll : 06-02-2007 at 22:40.
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Old 07-02-2007, 00:06
gritty
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One of the parents mentioned the elegance of the sport and then the parents shouting out during the competition. Horrible.

In my sport outside assistance would result in elimination. Shouting anything would be extremely frowned upon. Can I suggest ballroom competitions re-look at their rules. It didn't do the sport any favours being seen in that light on national tv.
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Old 07-02-2007, 00:42
Bruno's Girl
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In many other walks of life, some of those parents would be reported to Social Services.
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Old 07-02-2007, 09:07
* Becca *
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In most competitions though, spectators are encouraged to voice their support for their favourites. Even at the most prestigious competitions, it's the done thing.

I dunno. That's just dancesport to me, anyway.
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Old 07-02-2007, 12:58
laurab88
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I found Ellie's parents and the brother/sister partnerships mum very annoying.

I think Mason's parents and Tabitha's mum had their head screwed on the right way, and it was more of the kids doing it for themselves because they wanted to, not because the parents wanted to.
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Old 07-02-2007, 12:59
dancingbearbear
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Originally Posted by Amytigger
Just out of interest what does everyone have against these kids?? Is it jealousy?? They're very talented and are pushed hard to get where they do in life. I enjoy watching them and think they're lovely to watch!
They may be lovely to watch dancing, but for me their attitude off the dance floor needs some work, as shown when they did the alternative panel on ITT:


http://www.digitalspy.co.uk/forums/s...e#post11713269

Originally Posted by dancingbearbear
Horrible horrible children. I know Claire wasn't the greatest dancer but the say "she's so rubbish she can't even manage to keep her foot on the floor" is a bit cocky. I'd like to see them come face to face with her and say that. Their criticism was not at all constructive, and I'd be ashamed of any child iof mine who was that needlessly unpleasant and rude about other people. I know they're only young, but they'll have heard enough constructive criticism from their teachers and at comps to come out with something a bit less snarky then "oooh, at last she moved her hip".

I thought they were good on saturday, but have now revised my opinion of them considerably. They were even more vile than those stage school girls. I would suggest their parent teach them a bit of humility quick-smart, cos if they go around with that snotty sarky attitude much longer they'll soon be old enough to find themselves on the business end of a bitch-slap!
Having said that, I have not yet watched last night's programme (recorded it), but if the parents are as heinous as the comments on here suggest I suppose its no great surprise that they have the attitude they do.

Last edited by dancingbearbear : 07-02-2007 at 13:00.
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Old 07-02-2007, 12:59
dancingbearbear
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Originally Posted by dippydozy
I am thankfully past the stage of being jealous of an 11 year old child!

No I have no time for rude children mocking a lady in her 40/50's (Claire) for doing her best to learn a new skill - just because they learn't dancing when they were young and it came easily to them, let's see them learn a skill they may struggle with.

I thought they were revolting, they to me were every reason why kids shouldn't be in the limelight
And as far as I am aware none of them suffers from arthritis as Claire did!
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Old 07-02-2007, 13:04
dippydozy
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Originally Posted by dancingbearbear
Having said that, I have not yet watched last night's programme (recorded it), but if the parents are as heinous as the comments on here suggest I suppose its no great surprise that they have the attitude they do.
I've never seen a more miserable bunch of looking children, even doing the dancing they looked fed up.

One telling thing one of them said was that he always wanted to be famous and got the impression that was just a step on the ladder.

Utterly depressing viewing, it makes me hopes the pros on SCD didn't have childhoods or parents like that it would taint the enjoyment of the show for me
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Old 07-02-2007, 13:41
SlinkyMalinky
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Originally Posted by dippydozy
I've never seen a more miserable bunch of looking children, even doing the dancing they looked fed up.

One telling thing one of them said was that he always wanted to be famous and got the impression that was just a step on the ladder.

Utterly depressing viewing, it makes me hopes the pros on SCD didn't have childhoods or parents like that it would taint the enjoyment of the show for me
Yes, I noticed the dreaded 'want to be famous' statement

When I heard that Ian was going to be on Richard & Judy (Vincent being on was an added delicious bonus and surprise ) - I guessed it would be in connection with the Ballroom Babes prog, and thought R&J would be asking Ian about his own experience as a youngster - or what his opinions were, and was v disappointed that they didn't.

I realise that Lilia and Karen were competing at a very young age but I just can't see poor little Ellie growing up to be a very happy or confident person, despite her dancing talent. Poor thing could barely utter two words when she was on R&J. I blame the parents !!

All of us who are parents appreciate that any sporting/ musical/dance/drama/academic talent needs suppport to flourish - that's SUPPORT, not bullying or tyranny! Children, inevitably, soak up the attitudes of their parents so parents have a duty not to show mean-spirited peevishness or the nasty side of competitiveness. Anyone with slightly clumsy, chubby little daughters at dance lessons will know exactly what I mean!
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Old 07-02-2007, 13:59
dippydozy
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Maybe that's it, Karen and Lilia and clearly very happy people and full of confidence you must need to be that way inclined to endure the knock backs and criticisim.

One pro who never looks like he loves dance is Darren Bennett, don't his parents own a dance school?

Before I get leapt on I'm not having a pop at his parents but I'd imagine dancing was the easy and most natural path to follow!
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Old 07-02-2007, 14:05
nancy1975
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'Amateurs?' said the old clown, looking over the top of the steel spectacles that gave him such a severe look when in plain clothes. 'No, you won't run across many amateurs in our business. You see...' he shook out the shimmering silk folds of a pair of vermilion pantaloons on to which he was sewing gold and silver stars '....ours is a job for what you might call specialists. Even to make a clown's dress like this so as to hit the public slap in the eye needs experience. And, you may take it from me, you can't become a rider-what we reckon a rider- nor yet an acrobat, nor yet go on the wire or the trapeze without you've studied from the first days you can stand. That's why circus people will tell you that all this fancy education is ruining the business; takes the kids away when they most need to be learning something useful. I'm speaking of what I know.'

The Understudy. 1931.

This is the second oldest business in the world, and like the first it's being ruined by amateurs, or in this case armchair critics.

The reason I quote the above is that I have seen children in European circuses performing feats that would probably cause a ruckus here, but they have the freedom to without the bureaucracy. Also it's perfectly true that to really excel in anything, including ballroom dancing, it should be from as early an age as possible. I have no truck with the parents as seen on the programme, as it's peculiar that they're unable to do what they want the kids to do. They should have a red card and sent off for the shouting. Also they seem to be offloading their own angst on their offspring. But I find it strange that some people are upset about children doing it at all. How do they think the pros on SCD have reached the level they have? Where do they think the pros from tomorrow will come from? There was a segment on the ITT before the final with the Lilia and Karen's story. They were the same age, doing the same competitions, what's the difference? Yet I don't recall any controversy.

It wasn't so long ago that children left school at 14 and went straight to work. My own father was asked by my grandfather in 1951 at the age of 11 on his circus 'You can't ride, can you'. (He knew damn well he couldn't.) He replied no. 'Well, get practising, you're in the ring tomorrow!'

Whether the kids are enjoying it or not, is another argument, it seemed anyway that the boys were enjoying it more than the girls. But if they do, and go on, compete as an adult or get qualified as a dance teacher, what the hell's wrong with that? Better than wasting your time til the age of 22 in a university only to emerge with a useless degree that everybody else has anyway.

I would put dancing on the curriculum, it'd be better than Mandarin (They should be taught English as well.) Boys are sidelined more and more it seems by a female dominated teaching ethos that actively dislikes competitiveness. Boys by nature are competitive. Probably also another reason why they seemed to be enjoying it more. As for the girls, they seemed to be dressed modestly enough. Any performance needs make up etc to stand out on a distance. We seem very confused about how to raise children, and a lot make a terrible fist of it. On the hand it seems fine for them to dress as miniature adults, and to perform suggestive dance routines to pop 'If you wanna be my lover' on the other, but to commit to something that might take some talent is somehow wrong.
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Old 07-02-2007, 14:31
SlinkyMalinky
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I don't think any of us armchair critics have issues with the children dancing - we've all commented on how beautifully they dance and what a marvellous talent they have. I always comment on how much I admire the dedication, discipline and hard work involved. The targets of our criticism are the parents and the extreme degree of unpleasant competitiveness. The parents shown in the programme (intentionally - cos it makes good tv) were pretty bad and I predict that their children will either rebel eventually, or have all the real spirit knocked out of them, which will make them far less passionate dancers.

It WOULD be much more interesting to have a programme about, for example, Karen's, Lilia's, Darren's, Ian's experience of dancing from a young age as I'm sure it would give a much more useful insight.

Also, whatever the experts claim, I just can't get to grips with 9 year old girls in fake tan, red lipstick and turquoise eyeshadow. Appreciate they need to stand out etc etc, but there are better ways! 9 year olds are naturally lovely - a touch of powder, mascara to define their eyes and a bit of colour on their lips should be enough.

Also - the beauty of SCD is that it brings the specialised world of dancing out to everybody. We benefit, and the dancing world benefits - so our comments do have their place!

You do have a point about little girls from 2 upwards gyrating sexually to Pussycat Dolls etc. I prefer watching the SCD pros doing the ChaChaCha to that myself !
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Old 07-02-2007, 14:35
nancy1975
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It was just 3 sets of parents shown (one single) and doesn't mean necessarily they're all like that in this world. TV's selective editing is notorious anyway, and I would be sceptical of an hour long programme showing a balanced picture.
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Old 07-02-2007, 14:40
dippydozy
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Originally Posted by nancy1975
It was just 3 sets of parents shown (one single) and doesn't mean necessarily they're all like that in this world. TV's selective editing is notorious anyway, and I would be sceptical of an hour long programme showing a balanced picture.

Judging the parents aside you couldn't hide the looks in the children's faces when dancing!

They were obviosuly brilliant but looked like they were going through the motions to keep Mum happy!

I love the idea of dance being taught in school, it can then be learn't in a fun enviroment and if the children have a natural love of it that would shine through (to learn further if they wished) instead of parents joining them up for classes they feel obliged to do.
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Old 07-02-2007, 14:42
nancy1975
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Originally Posted by dippydozy
Judging the parents aside you couldn't hide the looks in the children's faces when dancing!

They were obviosuly brilliant but looked like they were going through the motions to keep Mum happy!

I love the idea of dance being taught in school, it can then be learn't in a fun enviroment and if the children have a natural love of it that would shine through (to learn further if they wished) instead of parents joining them up for classes they feel obliged to do.
I think it should because I have to stick my neck out on this (big mistake) and say that children don't actully push themselves (rarely anyway) and if it was in schools it would save a lot of angst and pressures as seen.
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